How to avoid falling in love with a friend

Falling in love with your friend with benefits (FWB) is like working full-time as an unpaid internВ at a company you’re crazy about with no guarantee of a job at the end of it all.

It sucks, especially when you’re the one who’s caught feelings.

You might be lucky enough to have your feelings reciprocated, but you’re more likely going to get your feelings hurt.

If you’re in the latter camp, I’m here to commiserate with you.

Here are the five stages of falling in love with your FWB:

Stage 1: You Won’t, Under Any Circumstances, Catch Feelings.

This is the best stage. You’re probably recently out of a relationship and emotionally unavailable, but you’re also sexually frustrated.

One-night stands are an option, but let’s face it: The morning after and the walk of shame back to your apartment aren’t as fun as when you’re doing it every single weekend.

Plus, you don’t want to catch any diseases from strangers. What’s the next best option?

Doing it on a regular basis with someone you know and trust, without the label of “significant other.”

The beginning is so much fun. You get along with this person, you’re (hopefully) having bomb-ass sex and there aren’t any strings attached.

You never have to feel guilty when you’re flirting with other people or lazily flicking through Tinder.

There is just one unspoken rule: You two have to keep it this way for as long as possible.

You’re having fun at this point and you promise yourself that you won’t, under any circumstances, become attached.

Stage 2: You Start To Settle Into A Routine.

The 4 am texts start to become 2 pm texts and the two of you gradually settle into a pleasantly predictable routine.

It’s fairly comforting, and there are still no relationship obligationsВ you have to keep in mind.

You fit this person into your busy schedule and he or she fits perfectly between the last class you have on Monday and dinner with friends.

This is also a good stage because the two of you are still getting along and ostensibly, want the same thing.

For many FWB relationships, this is the longest stage, and the rest of your FWB relationship will ideally play out in this manner until one of you gets bored or meets another person.

In some FWB relationships, however, this is the stage when you start to become a little too comfortable in your routine. It brings up feelings that are reminiscent of a relationship.

After all, you two are sharing a lot more than spit, and at this point, you’re doing so on a regular basis. Depending on the type of person you are, this could lead to a lot of trouble.

Stage 3: You Start To Develop Feelings.

You’re lingering at your FWB’s house for longer and longer and now, the two of you have extended activities from purely hooking up to actually talking and hanging out.

This keeps happening until one day, you wake up beside this person, look overВ and start to freak out because you realize you genuinely like him or her.

You like the way this person makes you laugh as much as you like the way he or she make you come.

You start to fantasize about this person outside of the bedroom: picking out vegetables at a farmer’s market, picking out furniture at IKEA or doing other non-sexual relationship-type activities. Yikes.

At this stage, you consider breaking it off for a number of reasons. Maybe your last relationship was a disaster and this arrangement was only supposed to be a short-term thing.

Maybe you recognize you’re falling for emotionally unavailable people because you’re emotionally unavailable yourself.

Despite your normally logical trains of thought, you can’t deny your feelings for this person.

Now, every time you come over, you experience a wave of nausea, or you start to take certain actions В that used to mean nothing to you more seriously.

This person offered you carrots? Carrots mean nourishment, and if he or she wants to nourish you, maybe he or she also has feelings for you? You’re going a little crazy at this point.

Stage 4: You Admit Your Feelings To Your FWB, And Everything Falls Apart.

Once you admit your feelings to your FWB, it could go one of two ways. Ideally, of course, your FWB returns your feelings, and both of you want to take the arrangement to the next level.

More often though, your FWB doesn’t return your feelings, and the house of cards the two of you built together so precariously falls apart.

After all, if your FWB were the type of person who wanted to be in a relationship, wouldn’t he or she be in a relationship already?

You two may still meet every once in a while in order to relieve some sexual frustration, but once you admit your feelings and get rejected, nothing is quite the same.

The fun you used to have with each other is replaced by a general awkwardness created by the vacuum of his or her unreciprocated feelings for you.

Every time you have sex, you get a little more attached and just a tiny bit more heartbroken. You do this until you realize you can’t handle it any longer.

Your arrangement ends, either with an ultimatum or with both parties silently agreeing to never speak to one another again.

Stage 5: You Learn From Your Experience.

Falling in love with someone who doesn’t return your feelings is messy when you factor sex into the equation.

This is the worst stage because there aren’t any real guidelines to help you when your FWB relationship inevitably dissolves.

How do you cope with the ending of a relationship that wasn’t even really a relationship?

Your friends may be able to relate, but eating ice cream straight out of the tub and staring at Netflix for a week isn’t exactly the best protocol for situations like these.

Honestly, your only option is to pick yourself back up, brush yourself off and realize your FWB is just another person to add to your list of experiences. You know you’ll be okay in the end.

How to avoid falling in love with a friend

It can be difficult to avoid falling too hard or too fast for someone, especially if you’re new to dating or have been out of the game for a while. It’s easy to get swept away with the new person you’re seeing— and it’s a completely natural instinct— but it can be good to slow things down. My mom always says I’m far more pragmatic than romantic, and I certainly like to protect myself, which is maybe why I find this so important. But I do think keeping some distance early in the relationship set you up better for the long run.

It’s all about keeping perspective, but that’s so much easier said than done. Even being a pretty pragmatic person when it comes to love and romance, I certainly get the urge to spend loads of time with my girlfriend and skip yoga or cancel plans. But I also really love my friends, and want to spend time with them, and know there’s a good reason I go to yoga and bootcamp and do standup. So when I want to disappear into my blankets and spend all day in bed, I remind myself how much I love the other things that I do. And more important, I remind myself that I want this relationship to actually be a part of my life, rather than a flash in the pan.

So how do you keep yourself for falling to hard? Here’s my best advice:

1. Talk To Your Friends

When it comes to gauging our relationships, friends are a great asset. If you have people you trust, who can give you tough love when you don’t want to hear it, you’re really lucky and should use that. Ask them outright if you’re losing perspective or being unrealistic, and if they think you are— don’t get defensive, just listen, and remember you trust them for a reason.

2. Don’t Start Spending All Of Your Time Together

It’s the quickest way to fall too hard. Obviously in the honeymoon period of a new relationship, you feel like you’re in an amazing little bubble when the two of you spend time together. That’s completely natural. But if you spend all of your time in that little bubble, you’re going to fall too hard. Come up for air every once in a while. You don’t need to go on five dates a week from when you meet each other, there’ll be plenty of time down the road.

3. Keep Your Hobbies

Yeah, those things like your pilates workshop or your art class may not seem so important when you can stay curled up with your new favorite person, but it is. You can’t let these things fall on the wayside, because for you to keep from getting in too deep, you need to keep some things that are just yours. It may not seem so important in the first month, but months down the line you’ll be grateful you kept up with what you love.

4. Remember This Feeling From Other Relationships

Romantic memory spans are weirdly short. People that you used to think you couldn’t live without, you probably laugh about as so ridiculous you don’t know why you were ever with them. Yet when it comes to a new relationship, you forgot that your emotions could ever switch so quickly, or you convince yourself you’ve never felt this way before. But you almost certainly have. The funny thing about love is that yours always feel unique and special, but you have to remember it’s not— falling in love is not special or unique— it’s universal and most people will do it more than once. It doesn’t make what you’re feeling any less lovely and incredible, just bear it in mind.

5. Don’t Ignore Their Flaws

There’s nothing scarier than when your friend starts saying their new S.O. is “perfect”. Because nobody’s perfect. We all do dumb things and have weird personality traits and that’s totally fine. But if you’re convinced the person you’re with is just perfect, you’re just not being realistic and instead you’re falling really hard for the idea of a person rather than the person themselves. Maybe the person you’re with talks too much or likes music you hate— that’s fine! And no reason not to be with them. You should love them with their flaws, rather than just be pretending they don’t exist.

6. Remind Yourself You Want It To Last

The only real problem with falling too hard too fast is that it’s not really sustainable, and could probably lead to you getting hurt. Yes, you love spending time with that person and it feels like it would be amazing to be around them every second, but if you really want things to last you need to find out how to integrate into each other’s lives rather than dropping everything for each other. Because that won’t last. So don’t think of it as holding back or not being romantic, it’s actually showing how much you care about the person, because you want to be with them for a long time.

Want more of Bustle’s Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our new podcast, I Want It That Way, which delves into the difficult and downright dirty parts of a relationship, and find more on our Soundcloud page.

How to avoid falling in love with a friend

“Do not fall for someone who is not ready to catch you.” – Unknown

Falling in love is the easiest thing one can do, be it intentionally or unintentionally. However, getting away from those fluttery feelings is the most painful and gradually happening task. Even if we just met a person, the way back to square one gets full of thorns.

But, is there a way to not let anyone fall in love with you? Or how to avoid falling in love with a friend with benefits? Or how to not fall in love with your best friend? Give us the opportunity to answer your questions.

How To Not Fall In Love With Your Best Friend Or Just Anyone?

One thing we should always remember is that the romantic memory spans are weirdly brief. And this is how we can reverse the phenomenon of falling in love with just anyone.

#1. Distraction Comes To Your Rescue

You don’t have to let this person manipulate your thoughts in just any way or by any means. It may seem difficult, but you will have to stop thinking about this person and make it appear doable to not let them be a significant part of your existence. Sooner or later, such an infatuation gradually fades away.

But it’s just a little unmanageable during the initial stages. So, keep yourself and your thoughts distracted through hobbies or other activities to make you invest your brain in something that doesn’t relate to this. Anytime you feel the need for this person or just feel lonely, get busy with some activity that’s a full-brainer.

#2. You Should Not Get Over Friendly

The first way to not get over friendly is to not have deep and long conversations. Absolutely avoid these during the night time. Don’t let any late night calls or texts let you get carried away. You can also reduce the times you meet that particular person. This way, you are not only maintaining a safe distance between you two but are also not getting over friendly which may lead to some strings getting attached. When you aren’t sharing that emotional intimacy, you are shutting your ways that lead to profound love.

#3. No Physical Intimacy

It is pretty normal for you to feel like you are floating on the clouds when you meet someone new, or someone who is just like you. You want to cuddle up with them; you feel like holding their hands or just want to feel their warmth every time. But that’s exactly what you don’t have to do. Because the moment you might walk away from them is the moment, you would come falling to the ground.

The same rule applies when you are in friends with benefits kind of relationship. So, how to avoid falling in love with a friend with benefits? Physical intimacy might be your chosen option, but you don’t have to just depend on this very factor of the relationship. Take it very casually, and you are good to go!

How to avoid falling in love with a friend

#4. Maybe You Can Focus On Someone Else

When you are focusing on someone apart from this person, it is the easiest way to get over the lovey-dovey sentiments. Divert your attention towards someone who is different from this person and in no way reminds you of him/ her.

Sometimes, flirting is the best option to how to not fall in love with your best friend, a friend with benefits or maybe a person you just met. Even if you are head over heels, flirting easily gets you through this phase. It helps you see the world outside of this person.

#5. Determine Your Differences

One sure way of how to not fall in love with your best friend or for that matter with just anyone is to determine why the two of you are incompatible. You probably can list down a number of traits that do not match. This way, you will focus more on their negative side rather than the positive ones to make them fall in love with you.

All you have to do is detach yourself from the other person on an emotional level and then make a decision. Make sure to not focus on the insignificant things but the ones that really can get you to stay apart.

#6. Focus On Your Personal Interests And Needs

When you love yourself first, everything else just falls into place automatically. So, focus on your individual goals and objectives to stop thinking about this person. This way, you enable your brain to shift the gears and build the strength to forget the silly love of your life. Consult a mentor or a life coach or maybe a close family member or your BFF to help you figure out your life goals and accomplish them in a timely manner.

Start getting more social and prioritize your own needs as you are the only one to make yourself compete with the rest of the world. But how to stop falling in love in such a case? Devote time to your hobbies, confide in your friend circle or consider speaking your heart out to someone you trust. You will feel better.

#7. Remember This Feeling From Another Relationship?

When we consider starting a new relationship, what we tend to forget is the emotional connection that we may have had even before. Love gets you into funny situations. You weirdly and shortly start feeling unique. You start convincing yourself that such feelings haven’t been witnessed before. And you also probably start thinking that you cannot live without the other person.

But, wait a minute, just rewind a little and check for yourself – such kind of sensations have been felt even before. Falling in love doesn’t really remain special, and with a majority of us, we have felt this way even before the cupid’s arrow gets stuck. So, keep in mind that this too can be just like any other relationship that you might have formed and broken within no time.

How to avoid falling in love with a friend

#8. Maybe You Can Talk To This Person

If all else fails, just opt for the way that should be the last option – talk to this particular person. Let him/ her know that you like them and also are starting to fall in love with them, but all you really want is to not fall in love. You never know that they might have the solution to your problem and they would be able to help you overcome these feelings.

#9. The No Contact Rule

As the title says, no contact rule pertains to maintaining absolutely no contract with this person till you start feeling better. It can terribly hurt initially; you might go all crazy to talk to them or feel their presence. But as the time starts to pass, you will realize how the life is much better without them. You would start concentrating on things that actually need your focus. And you may also understand that they were directly/ indirectly controlling your life and that now you are a free chirping bird.

Liked what you just read? Want to read more such interesting stuff? Let us know through the comment section below. We would love to hear from you!

(Image Courtesy: 1. Thought Catalog, 2. Marriage, 3. Health Enews, 4. ST Giles)

(Featured Image Courtesy: Love Panky)

So, I’m sitting God knows how many thousands of feet in the air on my way back to London, waking up to a beautiful sunrise, listening to some Ed Sheeran. An aching feeling in the middle of my chest suddenly makes an appearance as I’m watching the sun flare up the sky to my right.

You know that feeling of realization that just hits so close to home? You feel like you’re about to start crying but 1) you don’t cry (and by “you,” I mean me), and 2) if you absolutely had to, it wouldn’t be on a flight filled with strangers.

You’re all familiar with this story: You meet someone, friendshipВ develops, years go by and they become your person. However, we don’t choose when, how and who we love. We don’t control how it enters our lives orВ when it leaves. And to be honest, I don’t think love conquers all. There are other elements that work with love in order to make something last. However, the chemistry in these connections is undeniable.

I’m a hopeless romantic at heart. I love love, but I feel like society has ruined it for me. I really don’t care about the bouquets of flowers and dinners (although, all of that is great), I don’t care for someone to claim me as their #WCE on Instagram. I’m a romantic in the sense that there is someone out there who’s soul is the other half to yours. Someone who is compatible with you, even when you can’t explain it. I believe in a bond that is very unique in the way it develops, how long it lasts and the impact that it has on our lives.

Call it your soulmate, your missing piece, your beau … I’m a Pisces, and I am a natural dreamer. So, to believe that this exists is not far-fetched in my mind. However, since we live in the age of Tinder and “Netflix and chill,” I will not be holding my breath for handwritten love letters across continents anytime soon.

Let me tell you, when you have that “oh, sh*t” moment and realize you’re in way too deep andВ have been lying to yourself all along,В that’s whenВ you start seeing everything a lot clearer. It’s like a “diamonds in the sky” type of revelation. Let’s just say falling for a close friend will always go through a weird period of readjustment, especially when you’ve both confessed feelings for one another and don’t know if you’re going toВ move forward with it or not.

Emotions and vulnerability are messy, ladies and gentlemen. I love it, though. If you’re self-aware and introspective by nature, being in tune with how you feel is just what you do, but the other party at hand may run for the hills when sh*t gets a bit too real for them. Finding your person can be scary.

After a year of being ghosted, my friend and I reconnected and it was as if nothing ever happened. Maybe we’re good at sweeping things under the rug and moving on, or maybe it’s because 10 years of friendship and a real bond doesn’t just disappear overnight. But whatever the reason, I realized a few things about how we love people, how we react to getting hurt and how we let go:

1. We’re all romantics at heart.

You may be theВ person in your squad who will never be caught tearing up when watching a heartfelt movie (me too bro, me too), but no matter what your exterior shows, we are creatures that yearn for affection. We want someone to notice those little things about us, to notice when we’re not ourselves. We ultimately want someone who will be our life partner, through thick and thin. A lover and a best friend.

2. We forget humans are flawed.

You live and you learn, and one of the most important things I’ve learned is we all mess up. It’s so easy to be wronged and to flip the switch and go off. To be honest, for any of us to expect the people we care about to neverВ mess up is holding them to a standard we can’t even fulfill. The way we approach situations can be different, and how we exchange words could be wiser. Basically, we just need to handle situations better, people.

3. People come and go.

The people in our lives are not ours. We do not control their movements in our lives. And ultimately, they should be there to add to your life. You are not any less of a person if someone decides to leave, and it doesn’t have to be all bad after they do. I see it like this:

When I care about people, it’s an all or nothing type of love. I think I have a good read on people and I choose carefully, so I don’t get a bitter taste in my mouth when they do leave because 1) you have to let things be, and 2) the good memories will always outweigh the bad.

4. What flaws?

The friend I mentioned earlier always jokes that I put up with a lot of his shenanigans. But quite frankly, although I know what he’s talking about, I still don’t see it that way. The only way he can be this person I love is with everything that makes him, him. Flaws and all.

I have my vices and so do you, so how can we judge someone else for theirs and not look at our own first? However, if they’re indulging in activities that are a detriment to their lives and we truly care about them, then we help them the best we can.

5. We all have that person.

The person whoВ pops up in the back of our minds, the one we’re so comfortable with that we can be vulnerable and not fear getting hurt or rejected.В We have a person who may be the complete opposite from us, but may get to usВ better than most. These people are the ones whoВ will never leave our hearts, and thatВ can be both a tragedyВ or a fairytale. Either way, c’est la vie.

I guess what I’m trying to say is we have no control, and the sooner we realize that about ourselves, the easier it becomes to have some faith and let go. Don’t overcomplicate something so special. We all experience loveВ differently.

I may or may not be over someone I thought I had forgotten about, and he may or may not read this (let’s not talk about this, if you do). Through myВ early 20s, I’m learning that adulting is a mind-f*ck, and love is indeed a mother f*cker.

So, I’m sitting God knows how many thousands of feet in the air on my way back to London, waking up to a beautiful sunrise, listening to some Ed Sheeran. An aching feeling in the middle of my chest suddenly makes an appearance as I’m watching the sun flare up the sky to my right.

You know that feeling of realization that just hits so close to home? You feel like you’re about to start crying but 1) you don’t cry (and by “you,” I mean me), and 2) if you absolutely had to, it wouldn’t be on a flight filled with strangers.

You’re all familiar with this story: You meet someone, friendshipВ develops, years go by and they become your person. However, we don’t choose when, how and who we love. We don’t control how it enters our lives orВ when it leaves. And to be honest, I don’t think love conquers all. There are other elements that work with love in order to make something last. However, the chemistry in these connections is undeniable.

I’m a hopeless romantic at heart. I love love, but I feel like society has ruined it for me. I really don’t care about the bouquets of flowers and dinners (although, all of that is great), I don’t care for someone to claim me as their #WCE on Instagram. I’m a romantic in the sense that there is someone out there who’s soul is the other half to yours. Someone who is compatible with you, even when you can’t explain it. I believe in a bond that is very unique in the way it develops, how long it lasts and the impact that it has on our lives.

Call it your soulmate, your missing piece, your beau … I’m a Pisces, and I am a natural dreamer. So, to believe that this exists is not far-fetched in my mind. However, since we live in the age of Tinder and “Netflix and chill,” I will not be holding my breath for handwritten love letters across continents anytime soon.

Let me tell you, when you have that “oh, sh*t” moment and realize you’re in way too deep andВ have been lying to yourself all along,В that’s whenВ you start seeing everything a lot clearer. It’s like a “diamonds in the sky” type of revelation. Let’s just say falling for a close friend will always go through a weird period of readjustment, especially when you’ve both confessed feelings for one another and don’t know if you’re going toВ move forward with it or not.

Emotions and vulnerability are messy, ladies and gentlemen. I love it, though. If you’re self-aware and introspective by nature, being in tune with how you feel is just what you do, but the other party at hand may run for the hills when sh*t gets a bit too real for them. Finding your person can be scary.

After a year of being ghosted, my friend and I reconnected and it was as if nothing ever happened. Maybe we’re good at sweeping things under the rug and moving on, or maybe it’s because 10 years of friendship and a real bond doesn’t just disappear overnight. But whatever the reason, I realized a few things about how we love people, how we react to getting hurt and how we let go:

1. We’re all romantics at heart.

You may be theВ person in your squad who will never be caught tearing up when watching a heartfelt movie (me too bro, me too), but no matter what your exterior shows, we are creatures that yearn for affection. We want someone to notice those little things about us, to notice when we’re not ourselves. We ultimately want someone who will be our life partner, through thick and thin. A lover and a best friend.

2. We forget humans are flawed.

You live and you learn, and one of the most important things I’ve learned is we all mess up. It’s so easy to be wronged and to flip the switch and go off. To be honest, for any of us to expect the people we care about to neverВ mess up is holding them to a standard we can’t even fulfill. The way we approach situations can be different, and how we exchange words could be wiser. Basically, we just need to handle situations better, people.

3. People come and go.

The people in our lives are not ours. We do not control their movements in our lives. And ultimately, they should be there to add to your life. You are not any less of a person if someone decides to leave, and it doesn’t have to be all bad after they do. I see it like this:

When I care about people, it’s an all or nothing type of love. I think I have a good read on people and I choose carefully, so I don’t get a bitter taste in my mouth when they do leave because 1) you have to let things be, and 2) the good memories will always outweigh the bad.

4. What flaws?

The friend I mentioned earlier always jokes that I put up with a lot of his shenanigans. But quite frankly, although I know what he’s talking about, I still don’t see it that way. The only way he can be this person I love is with everything that makes him, him. Flaws and all.

I have my vices and so do you, so how can we judge someone else for theirs and not look at our own first? However, if they’re indulging in activities that are a detriment to their lives and we truly care about them, then we help them the best we can.

5. We all have that person.

The person whoВ pops up in the back of our minds, the one we’re so comfortable with that we can be vulnerable and not fear getting hurt or rejected.В We have a person who may be the complete opposite from us, but may get to usВ better than most. These people are the ones whoВ will never leave our hearts, and thatВ can be both a tragedyВ or a fairytale. Either way, c’est la vie.

I guess what I’m trying to say is we have no control, and the sooner we realize that about ourselves, the easier it becomes to have some faith and let go. Don’t overcomplicate something so special. We all experience loveВ differently.

I may or may not be over someone I thought I had forgotten about, and he may or may not read this (let’s not talk about this, if you do). Through myВ early 20s, I’m learning that adulting is a mind-f*ck, and love is indeed a mother f*cker.

Sometimes, a person right in front of you may be in love with you, but you don’t realize it. Perhaps you’re friends who hang out a lot and you even tell others that nothing’s going on — you’re “just friends.” However, little do you know that the person is harboring secret feelings for you .

Or maybe you are dating, but get mixed signals from them — though they’re not saying “I love you,” they are showing you through their subtle actions. Yes, they rescued you when you got stranded in the middle of the freeway when you ran out of gas, but isn’t that what friends do?

To get the scoop, Business Insider spoke to two relationship experts, including Dr. Suzana E. Flores , clinical psychologist and author of “ Facehooked: How Facebook Affects Our Emotions, Relationships, and Lives .” “While there is no guaranteed way to know if a person is truly in love with you , there are a few signs someone can show to reveal how they really feel,” Dr. Flores told Business Insider.

1. They have fun with you even if the task at hand is not fun, per se

The saying, “It’s not what you do, but who you’re with” is popular for a reason — because it’s true. Pay attention to the person who’s always there for you, even when the task at hand is not outwardly a fun one, like helping you move. “A sign someone may be in love with you includes their ability to have fun with you even during mundane tasks,” Dr. Flores said. “If they are happy to see you, no matter what the two of you are doing, it may be love.”

Kailen Rosenberg, elite matchmaker and founder of The Lodge Social Club , a dating application with a three-step vetting process that launched earlier this month, agrees. “The person will often go the ‘extra mile’ to help you with something — a project, a need, an errand, etc.,” she told Business Insider. “Bottom line, they want to be near you, thought of by you, and assist you.”

2. They look at you . a lot

The next time you’re with the person in question, note how often they look at you. Harvard psychologist Zick Rubin found a correlation between eye contact and love. In his study, couples deeply in love look at one another 75% of the time while talking, while people engaged in conversation only look at each other about 30-60% of the time.

“When someone is in love with you, they will stare at your eyes more directly and for a longer period of time; they want to be completely present with you,” Dr. Flores said. “This is why it’s so important to interact with a love interest in person versus just through digital connection — we need to connect emotionally through eye contact.”

3. They pay more attention to you

Everyone is busy, right? But people also make time for things — and others — that are important to them. “Someone may be in love when they begin to focus a lot of their attention on you, especially in one-on-one settings,” Dr. Flores said. Rosenberg agrees. “They’re just like the boy on the playground who used to pull your hair or tease you when you were a kid,” she said.

4. They show empathy — in good times and bad

When someone is not only sympathetic when something happens to you, but also empathetic, it may be another sign that they are in love with you . In other words, your happiness is their happiness, and your pain is their pain.

“Someone in love will care about your feelings and your well-being,” Dr. Flores said. “If he or she is able to show empathy or is upset when you are, not only do they have your back, but they also probably have strong feelings for you.”

5. They remember the little things

When it comes to reading signs to see if someone loves you, pay attention to the little things — because they’ll do them. You two may go to the movies and they’ll mix your popcorn with Raisinettes because you once mentioned you liked that salty and sweet combination.

“Someone in love will remember your birthday, your favorite color, and favorite meal, so the little things they remember and do for you are also meaningful,” Dr. Flores said.

6. They introduce you to the important people in their lives

The more people they introduce you to, especially those important to them, such as their family and best friends, the more likely it is they want to be closer to you emotionally.

“They’ll also go out of their way to connect you with their own friends and connections to help make your life or work easier,” Rosenberg said.

7. They often mention the future

How does the person act when it comes to talking about the future? Do they talk in more “we” language or “me” language? After all, you don’t talk about upcoming and faraway events with just anybody, unless you definitely want them in your life and by your side.

“Notice how the person behaves around you,” Dr. Flores said. “If they suddenly start speaking about a possible future with you, it’s a sign that they are falling in love or are already in love with you.”

How to avoid falling in love with a friend

How to avoid falling in love with a friendAvoid falling in love: Find yourself falling uncontrollably in love with the wrong person?! Use these 13 ways to avoid falling in love if you surely know it’s wrong for you! When you start to like someone, you don’t actually fall in love with them instantly. The feeling you experience is infatuation. And infatuation, as much as it feels like an inescapable wall that blocks your view from everything else, will eventually fade. Most of us who have a crush on someone end up falling more in love with each passing day, not because we’re so helplessly drawn towards than person, but because we voluntarily choose to let that person sink their hooks deeper into our heart.

More..

Falling in love and its confusions

Sometimes, it’s easy to be confused. A friend or a coworker could be charming and sweet, and before you know it, you may be having an emotional affair with them, or worse, falling head over heels in love with them even though every molecule in your body could be screaming out that you’re going down the wrong path.

And then you try to stop yourself, but each time you try, it only hurts you more.

And finally, you choose to give up fighting, and wallow in self pity and misery because you’re in love with someone who’s just so wrong for you, or someone who may never ever love you back the way you love them.

But the truth is, you’re still the one who’s in control of your own life and your own heart. You can choose to walk away from love instead of falling deep in it if you truly choose to.

Step #1 Is it such a bad idea?

So you’ve made up your mind that falling in love with a particular person, be it a friend or a colleague, is a bad idea.

But what’s your real motive behind walking away. If you want to get over someone and have their hooks loosened from your heart, you need to be very clear about why you choose to let go.

Weigh the pros and the cons. Do you think a long term relationship is impossible? Is there something about this person that just isn’t acceptable by you? Are they dating someone else, or perhaps, already married with kids?

If you want to avoid falling in love with someone, or want to stop loving someone, you need to be very clear about the reasons behind why you’re doing it.

How to avoid falling in love with a friend

How to avoid falling in love with a friendAvoid falling in love: Find yourself falling uncontrollably in love with the wrong person?! Use these 13 ways to avoid falling in love if you surely know it’s wrong for you! When you start to like someone, you don’t actually fall in love with them instantly. The feeling you experience is infatuation. And infatuation, as much as it feels like an inescapable wall that blocks your view from everything else, will eventually fade. Most of us who have a crush on someone end up falling more in love with each passing day, not because we’re so helplessly drawn towards than person, but because we voluntarily choose to let that person sink their hooks deeper into our heart.

More..

Falling in love and its confusions

Sometimes, it’s easy to be confused. A friend or a coworker could be charming and sweet, and before you know it, you may be having an emotional affair with them, or worse, falling head over heels in love with them even though every molecule in your body could be screaming out that you’re going down the wrong path.

And then you try to stop yourself, but each time you try, it only hurts you more.

And finally, you choose to give up fighting, and wallow in self pity and misery because you’re in love with someone who’s just so wrong for you, or someone who may never ever love you back the way you love them.

But the truth is, you’re still the one who’s in control of your own life and your own heart. You can choose to walk away from love instead of falling deep in it if you truly choose to.

Step #1 Is it such a bad idea?

So you’ve made up your mind that falling in love with a particular person, be it a friend or a colleague, is a bad idea.

But what’s your real motive behind walking away. If you want to get over someone and have their hooks loosened from your heart, you need to be very clear about why you choose to let go.

Weigh the pros and the cons. Do you think a long term relationship is impossible? Is there something about this person that just isn’t acceptable by you? Are they dating someone else, or perhaps, already married with kids?

If you want to avoid falling in love with someone, or want to stop loving someone, you need to be very clear about the reasons behind why you’re doing it.