How to be graceful

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How to be graceful

My grandmother was the classiest lady I knew. I learned a lot of my “how to be chic” lessons from watching my grandmother as a little girl. When she passed away last week those who spoke of her kept referencing her poise, style and her grace. It became evident that she wasn’t only my How To Be Chic and Graceful role model, but she was that for everyone who knew her. Here are 5 Lessons from my grandmother on how to be graceful:

Stand Tall (even if you are sitting down)-Your body language should say here I am. So many times as women we want to make ourselves small. We try not to take up too much space, or draw too much attention to our presence. We think being noticed means being judged. My grandmother was a tiny woman standing barely 5′ tall but I never realized that growing up. She always had a commanding presence because she was self-assured and actually filled the space she was in. You knew you were in the presensence of greatness because her body language told you so. Make sure that you stand or sit with purpose. People will believe what you tell them. If you are fidgety or withdrawn your body language says I don’t belong. And guess what? You won’t. Practice good posture, positive self-talk and mindfulness. Remember that you do belong.

Speak softly but suredly-there isn’t anything graceful about letting whatever pops into your head pop right out of your mouth, or about being rash, rude or profane, no matter how many Real Housewives of Wherever say so. However, there isn’t anything wrong with speaking your mind either. My grandmother definitely spoke her truth but she did so without yelling, cursing or hurling insults (or wine glasses and restaraunt tables). She spoke softly but with assurance. She chose her words carefully and she made her remarks thoughtfully. I believe that people don’t really hear you if your aren’t speaking calmly. What they focus on is your behavior, not your words. So if you want to be heard and respected you have to speak respectfully. Now I completely understand that this isn’t always possible. We all have areas where passion overtakes our purpose but try to proactively focus on your intention. What are you trying to convey? There is a huge difference between the two big A’s that rule communication- Are you being assertive or aggressive? If you are feeling yourself getting worked up do a quick check in and see which A you are practicing. Remember that there is a difference.

Remain Humble- there is nothing wrong with sharing good news. In the real world as well as the social media world there’s a delicate balance in announcing your accomplishments and bragging. I struggle with this too because I always want to come from a humble and grateful place but as an influencer and blogger its also important for me to share parts of my life with all of you. I try to focus on my intentions when sharing good news. My rule of thumb is to ask myself if my share is coming from a place of gratitude. If it is then I share away. If not I keep it to myself. Being humble doesn’t mean that you never share good news, it just means that you remember to ask yourself the why.

Dress well-I heard someone say once that Tom Ford believed that dressing well was a form of good manners. Exactly! This is what I have been trying to say for years. Now, I have no idea if he really said that, but I sincerely believe that statement to be true. Dressing well tells whomever you happen to be with that you cared enough to show up as the best version of yourself. This by the way , has nothing to do with brands or the cost of what you wear. A wrinkled shirt is still a wrinkled shirt no matter how much you paid for it. That might be fine if what you’re conveying is grunge(think the the Olson Twins).. but not grace (think Kate Middleton) Remember to dress neatly and appropriately for your environment.

Compliment others-my grandmother was a very beautiful woman. But what I loved about her was that she never waited for someone to tell her how pretty she looked (although they always did), she was always quick to offer someone else a kind and sincere word. Remember that there is beauty everywhere and there really is no excuse for not recognizing it in others. Giving sincere compliments to others not only fills them up but it fills you up as well. Remember that complimenting others makes you more aware of the beauty and goodness in the world.

So those are my (well really my grandmother’s) lessons on how to be graceful. My last piece of advice is that if all else fails just remember to act like a duck. You know… calm and collected on the surface while paddling madly below.

I would love to hear your thoughts on how you practice being graceful.

How to be graceful

“Being grateful” is common advice that everyone has heard: We all know that focusing on what you have instead of what you don’t have, can make you a happier person.

But, let’s face reality: It’s difficult to be grateful when you don’t feel that way. If things are not going well, the last thing you want to do is “look on the bright side” or “focus on the positive.” You’re entitled to feel skeptical about being grateful, right?

Well, not so fast, because science shows that feeling grateful actually does make a radical difference: In his book The Upward Spiral, Alex Korb, a UCLA neuroscientist, says that focusing on what you are grateful for actually releases dopamine and serotonin into your body.

Dopamine is a neurotransmitter that helps control the brain’s reward and pleasure centers. Serotonin is a neurotransmitter, as well, and is said to play a major part in mood regulation, anxiety and happiness. When these two chemicals are plentiful, we feel good; when they are low, we just don’t feel upbeat, plain and simple.

Korb also writes that the mere act of searching for something to be grateful for can make particular neurons in your brain more efficient, thus making it easier to feel grateful over time.

The difficulty with gratitude

A valid rebuttal to being tasked with feeling grateful is that it is hard to feel that way about things that come easy to us.

For instance, telling people to be thankful for the roof they have over their heads is hard for them to digest if they’ve never struggled with money. Or, telling someone to be thankful for the food they’re eating may not work if they simply can’t relate to someone starving in a distant land.

A related and common piece of advice is to list all the things you are grateful for and review it each day. While this is a step in the right direction, it’s difficult for us humans to focus on so many different items at once. It’s as if we’re multi-tasking with our thoughts and feelings.

So, if you’re trying to be thankful for the love of your spouse and the security of your job — at the same time — you may have a hard time getting a full sense of gratitude for either advantage.

Looking for ways to feel gratitude that make more sense? Here are ways to reprogram your brain to do just that:

1. Understand that your brain can rewire itself.

Neuropsychologists Rick Hanson, author of Buddha’s Brain, and Joe Dispenza, author of You Are the Placebo: Making Your Mind Matter, echo the findings mentioned above. For the sake of brevity, they explain that our memories come from neural connections in our brain. When we focus on a particular thought or feeling related to that memory, those connections become stronger and easier for us to remember.

However, when we stop dwelling on those thoughts, the connections dissipate, making it difficult for us to remember why they bothered us in the first place.

So, although it may be difficult at first, you should continue focusing on things you are grateful for, because that practice will get easier over time, as those new neural connections become stronger.

You will start noticing that those triggers that used to set you off don’t anymore and that you’re able to look on the bright or opportunisitic side of things much more easily.

2. Make a list.

The key is simplicity. When I am creating a performance program for my clients, I tell them to focus on how their three basic needs — safety, satisfaction and connection — are being fulfilled. .

When you are looking for what to be grateful for, focus only on one of these needs and pick only one thing you are grateful from among them. Don’t overload your brain. Focusing on one thing at a time enables you to emotionally invest in it fully. Here are some ideas:

Safety: What gives you comfort and security in your life? Think: health, your home, the city you live in, support of your family and friends, money, the freedom you have, a stable job, etc.

Satisfaction: What activities are you able to pursue that make you feel good or accomplished? Think: realizing goals, hitting targets at work, engaging in hobbies you enjoy, exercising, reading a good book, driving your car or enjoying the outdoors.

Connection: What makes you feel closer, loved and intimate or connected to others? Think: spending time with family and friends, meeting new people, volunteering, having a great meeting at work, enhancing a relationship with a colleague, being part of a sports event or a party where people share the same interests.

If you are having trouble finding something to be grateful for, watch the news and I’m sure you will get some ideas.

3. Focus on ‘the why.’

After each item on your list, write why you are grateful for it. This will help you associate an emotional response with it, and let it sink a little more into your brain. What impact does it have on your life? Why does it mean so much to you?

Gratitude is an emotion. So, to get its benefits, you must actually feel grateful for what you are focusing on. Just thinking about it or saying a list of things out loud won’t do much. I’ve written about this topic before. Take a look at “Why Your Morning Routine Doesn’t Work.”

4. Experience more.

Don’t worry if you are having trouble feeling grateful for things in your life. You’re probably unaccustomed to this way of thinking. You just need to surround yourself with things that will make you appreciate what you have.

Unfortunately, we feel most grateful for things in life when we recognize how little others have. But if we elevate our gratitude while helping others, then we create a win-win. I suggest volunteering with youth or helping out families in need, so you can see what they are going through and understand how much you truly do have.

5. Research.

If you are still finding it hard to feel thankful, do some research and learn about the conditions other people are facing in the world. You’ll have a different perspective on the issues you are dealing with. One strategy is to find a few videos that hit home and watch them every morning to remember how fortunate you are. This will kick your gratitude into action immediately, with little effort.

The point is not to exploit the bad things other people are going through and use them for our advantage. It is to understand that the more we appreciate what we have in life, the happier we will be, the happier our kids will be and the better a place this world will be.

How to be graceful

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Muscle tension, stiff joints and weak muscles are the major culprits of short, stiff and ungraceful movement. Relaxation and breathing techniques combine to increase body awareness and reduce stress and muscle tension to promote graceful movement. Stretching exercise increases flexibility and improves range of motion to create balanced and smooth body movement. Balance training helps keep you steady on your feet. Add core training to promote good posture and practice moving until you master the art of graceful movement.

Practicing Relaxed Movement

Most people carry tension in their shoulders, hands or feet, which can adversely affect the way they move. Walk across the room with your fist tightly clenched. Breathe in through your nose and exhale slowly through your mouth, as you unclench your fist and walk back. Notice the stiffness of your movements while your fists were clenched, compared to how freely you moved once you relaxed. Pay attention to your body tension as you go about your day, and practice keeping your body relaxed for more grace of movement.

Stretching

Stretching can serve as a relaxing cool-down after a workout or can leave you feeling energized after work or play. Stretch the major muscle groups of the calves, thighs, hips, lower back, neck and shoulders two to four times a week to promote flexibility of movement. Daily stretches such as toe touches keep the lower body limber and improve gracefulness by reducing daily muscle and joint stiffness. Slowly turn your head from side to side to stretch the muscles in your neck. Stretch out your arms and give yourself a hug to keep the upper body limber and moving smoothly.

Balance Training

Balance training improves your ability to shift your body weight while your body is in motion. This type of exercise can be as simple as standing on one foot, then the other. Increase the challenge by standing on one foot with your eyes closed or standing on one foot and slowly lifting the opposite arm over your head. Walking on grass, unpaved trails and other natural surfaces can also challenge you to maintain good balance. Balance training can be accomplished almost anywhere and is most effective when added to your daily routine.

Core Exercises

Maintain good posture to enhance your graceful appearance as you sit or move. Regular aerobic and strength-training exercises help control body weight, increase stamina and build strong bones and muscles needed for good posture and agility in movement. The core muscles of your abdomen, back, hips and pelvis stabilize your spine and are responsible for virtually every move you make, as well as your ability to maintain good posture. Add pushups or planks to your strength-training session, or for an added challenge, do situps on a stability ball. Graceful movement may take time to learn but will come with practice and patience.

10 Ways to Become More Grateful

Robert Emmons offers everyday tips for living a life of gratitude.

1. Keep a Gratitude Journal. Establish a daily practice in which you remind yourself of the gifts, grace, benefits, and good things you enjoy. Setting aside time on a daily basis to recall moments of gratitude associated with ordinary events, your personal attributes, or valued people in your life gives you the potential to interweave a sustainable life theme of gratefulness.

2. Remember the Bad. To be grateful in your current state, it is helpful to remember the hard times that you once experienced. When you remember how difficult life used to be and how far you have come, you set up an explicit contrast in your mind, and this contrast is fertile ground for gratefulness.

3. Ask Yourself Three Questions. Utilize the meditation technique known as Naikan, which involves reflecting on three questions: “What have I received from __?”, “What have I given to __?”, and “What troubles and difficulty have I caused?”

How to be graceful

4. Learn Prayers of Gratitude. In many spiritual traditions, prayers of gratitude are considered to be the most powerful form of prayer, because through these prayers people recognize the ultimate source of all they are and all they will ever be.

How to be graceful

The Gratitude Project

What if we didn’t take good things for granted? Learn how gratitude can lead to a better life—and a better world—in this new GGSC book.

5. Come to Your Senses. Through our senses—the ability to touch, see, smell, taste, and hear—we gain an appreciation of what it means to be human and of what an incredible miracle it is to be alive. Seen through the lens of gratitude, the human body is not only a miraculous construction, but also a gift.

6. Use Visual Reminders. Because the two primary obstacles to gratefulness are forgetfulness and a lack of mindful awareness, visual reminders can serve as cues to trigger thoughts of gratitude. Often times, the best visual reminders are other people.

7. Make a Vow to Practice Gratitude. Research shows that making an oath to perform a behavior increases the likelihood that the action will be executed. Therefore, write your own gratitude vow, which could be as simple as “I vow to count my blessings each day,” and post it somewhere where you will be reminded of it every day.

8. Watch your Language. Grateful people have a particular linguistic style that uses the language of gifts, givers, blessings, blessed, fortune, fortunate, and abundance. In gratitude, you should not focus on how inherently good you are, but rather on the inherently good things that others have done on your behalf.

9. Go Through the Motions. If you go through grateful motions, the emotion of gratitude should be triggered. Grateful motions include smiling, saying thank you, and writing letters of gratitude.

10. Think Outside the Box. If you want to make the most out of opportunities to flex your gratitude muscles, you must creatively look for new situations and circumstances in which to feel grateful.

Last modified on Fri 22 Jun 2001 21.33 BST

In many ways, defeat was William Hague’s greatest achievement. A resignation speech which mixed eloquence and emotion with heart-rending honesty made him one of the all-time great losers. If only the rest of us could manage to lose with similar grace; unfortunately most people find the role of loser one of the hardest to play in the world.

“When I lost my first pitch I behaved so childishly I can’t think about it without squirming,” says advertising account manager, Kate Callerton. “We were pitching for a really big account, a well known tour operator and I’d spent weeks slaving over the presentation, obsessively organised every aspect – from which fruit should be on the table, to what colour paper the presentation should be on. I thought it all went brilliantly – until the call came telling us they’d chosen to go with our main competitor. I spent the rest of the afternoon crying in the toilets.”

According to Cary Cooper, psychology professor at UMIST, Kate’s reaction is not necessarily a bad one. “The first thing you need to acknowledge about losing is that it is going to hurt,” he says. “Later on, you may be able to rationalise it, or logically explain why it happened, but the first reaction is going to be a bad one – whether it’s tears, anger or frustration. It’s important to let these feelings out – as long as you manage them correctly.”

Managing feelings, however, can be extremely tough and Kate admits that she didn’t cope well with losing. “I spent the next couple of weeks feeling really depressed – my self esteem was hugely affected. I felt I’d done everything possible to win the pitch, but at the end of the day, I hadn’t been good enough. It seriously made me question if I was in the right career – and I was a complete nightmare to work with for the next couple of months.”

“In all competitive situations someone has to lose and it can seem very difficult to deal with at first,” believes psychologist Colin Gill. “Losing can dent your self confidence and self esteem and make you feel very bitter and frustrated, but it is important not to walk away from the experience with unremittingly negative feelings. Try to learn from the situation, be honest about things you did well and things that could have been done better. Try to discover why the pitch or project went to someone else, and learn from it.”

Losing to another company may be hard, but if the person you lose out to is one of your colleagues, the situation can be even tougher. “My company was awarded the project management of a major renovation on a stately home,” says Carl Wade, “and I really wanted to head up the team. I’d been assistant manager on several projects and I felt it was my time to move up. I talked to my boss about it and believed the job was mine – until he gave it to someone else in the office, who had no more experience than I did.”

In this sort of situation, the dignified thing to do is to congratulate your colleague – but it can be tremendously difficult if you feel the project was rightfully yours. “The guy who won the project invited everyone out for drinks to celebrate but I couldn’t go,” admits Carl. “I know I should have gone and put a brave face on it, but I couldn’t. Instead I got smashed with my mates, moaned for an entire night about the unfairness of it all and felt much better in the morning.”

Although it might seem impossible that anything positive could come out of losing, once the initial shock and disappointment abates there are steps to take. “Talk to your boss,” says Cary Cooper, “and be frank. Admit how disappointed you are – it will show him that you are ambitious and motivated to move up. Take any criticism gracefully – even if you think it is unfair. Don’t react immediately, but go away and think about everything that has been said. Even though it’s hard to have your shortcomings pointed out, it’s the fastest way to overcome them.”

Carl Wade agrees. “I had a meeting with my boss and he told me I’d lost out because he felt I wasn’t ready for the responsibility. My relationships with clients and contractors were good, but my attitude was wrong; I came in late, took long lunches, always left bang on time.

“It stung to hear it, but I had to admit that it was all true. So, I changed my habits, knuckled down and really committed to the job and it paid off. Last month I got my own project to manage – and it’s bigger than the one that I lost.”

No-one likes being a loser. It’s OK to be angry, upset, disappointed. It’s not OK to let it affect your self esteem. Learn from it, let it go – and move on.

How to be graceful

You’re on stage. Three hundred pairs of eyes are fixed on you. You’re killing: Twenty minutes in and the audience is in the palm of your hand.

Then your slide show freezes up.

Your skin tingles. Your body tenses. You stammer. Your eyes dart back and forth from the audience to the screen to your laptop to the stage manager in the wings.

As Beilock and Carr describe it, “Pressure raises self-consciousness and anxiety about performing correctly, which increases the attention paid to skill processes and their step-by-step control. Attention to execution at this step-by-step level is thought to disrupt well-learned or proceduralized performances.”

Or, as those of us less learned describe it, you choke.

Still, some how, some way, in the very same situation, other people don’t choke. What do they have that we don’t?

Maybe it’s coolness under fire. Maybe it’s what the more colorful call knowing what to do when the crap hits the fan. Whatever you call that sense of grace under pressure, some people are just born with it, right?

Some people do seem naturally confident and poised under pressure. But poise isn’t natural. Poise is a skill that some people develop.

People like you.

How? Let’s start with a basic premise. When you panic, you don’t freak out because you lack bravery or courage. You don’t lose your cool because you aren’t born with the right stuff.

You panic because you face an uncomfortable situation and you don’t know what to do. You freeze because you haven’t done the work to change, “Oh-my-God-this-can-NOT-be happening-to-me-right-now. ” into, “Oops. That’s unfortunate. Oh well. No problem. I know what to do.”

That’s why hanging tough when things go wrong isn’t the result of bravery. Bravery is the result of knowing what to do and how to do it when things go wrong. Thinking clearly and staying at the top of your game is easy when you’ve actually practiced for the worst.

And that’s why the key to maintaining your poise during even the most stressful situations is to gain experience. Not just any experience, though; the right kind of experience, the kind that builds confidence.

For example, say you’re scheduled to do a product demo for an important customer. The pressure is high because your business is struggling and if you don’t land this customer you might have to let some employees go.

Here’s how to ensure you can stay cool–no matter what happens:

1. Practice the basics.

Run through your demo a number of times. Smooth out the kinks. Make sure you know it cold.

Make sure you can perform it on autopilot–in a good way–so that some of your focus can be applied to reading the room instead of wondering, “Okay, what do I do next?”

Then think about the most likely questions or interruptions. Rehearse what you’ll do if the client wants to see a certain function again. Rehearse what you’ll do if the client wants to know how a certain function applies to their processes. From the customer’s point of view, the best demos are interactive and informal–make sure you’re ready to present the demo as a conversation rather than a presentation.

2. Then rework the basics.

All your initial practice will result in a set of logical steps: 1, 2, 3. To really know your stuff, change it up. Start with step 5. Start at the end and work backwards. Skip a couple of steps.

Rehearsing a different order helps reinforce your knowledge of your material and also prepares you for those inevitable moments when the client says, “That sounds good so far. but what I really want to know is this.”

When that happens you won’t need to say, “We’ll get to that later,” and frustrate your client because you’re fully prepared to get to it now.

3. Practice the “What if?”

Once your presentation is in good shape it’s time to prepare for things that could cause you to freeze. What if your software locks up? Figure out what you’ll do. What if your client is delayed and you only get 10 minutes instead of 30? Decide how to shorten your presentation so you still hit key points. What if you get questions you aren’t able to answer? Decide how you will respond.

Go ahead; go crazy. Think of some outlandish scenarios and decide how you’ll handle them. It’s actually kind of fun.

4. Visualize.

Athletes mentally rehearse; they imagine themselves performing an action. It works for them–and can work for you.

There’s no need to make your product fail on cue so you can practice what to do. Just rehearse it in your mind. There’s no need to get a few friends to role play hijacking your meeting so you can rehearse how you’ll respond. Just picture it happening, and picture what you’ll do.

Not only is visualization effective, it also has a calming effect: Picturing yourself succeeding is a great way to build confidence and self-assurance.

That’s especially true if you:

5. Create solution shelves.

Responding quickly is a skill that can be developed; that’s why the military, police, and emergency workers train relentlessly. There’s no need to think on your feet if you’ve already done the thinking. Stick your solutions on mental shelves, and when you’re faced with a tough situation, reach for the solution.

Go back to your “What If” scenarios. If a key employee doesn’t show, what’s the solution? Stick the answer on your shelf. What if price is an issue before you even get a chance to start? Stick the answer on your shelf. What if the room you’re shown into isn’t appropriate for the demo? Stick the answer on your shelf.

The more answers you prepare and shelve, the more you can rehearse and visualize. Instead of having to think on your feet, it’s stimulus-response.

Stimulus-response is easy.

6. Learn from close calls.

Say something goes wrong; your client doesn’t notice, but you realize it was a close call that could have ruined the presentation. Don’t just walk away relieved. Think through what you could have done–and add the solution to your mental shelf.

Close calls are like gifts, because they let you learn painlessly.

7. Rinse and repeat everywhere.

You can apply this approach to almost any situation, whether business or personal: Giving feedback, pitching investors, disciplining employees, dealing with confrontation, playing a sport, starting and building relationships. it doesn’t matter.

You don’t need to be brave. Just take a systematic approach to developing skills and gaining confidence.

Do the work and bravery, composure, and coolness under fire are unnecessary.

10 Ways to Become More Grateful

Robert Emmons offers everyday tips for living a life of gratitude.

1. Keep a Gratitude Journal. Establish a daily practice in which you remind yourself of the gifts, grace, benefits, and good things you enjoy. Setting aside time on a daily basis to recall moments of gratitude associated with ordinary events, your personal attributes, or valued people in your life gives you the potential to interweave a sustainable life theme of gratefulness.

2. Remember the Bad. To be grateful in your current state, it is helpful to remember the hard times that you once experienced. When you remember how difficult life used to be and how far you have come, you set up an explicit contrast in your mind, and this contrast is fertile ground for gratefulness.

3. Ask Yourself Three Questions. Utilize the meditation technique known as Naikan, which involves reflecting on three questions: “What have I received from __?”, “What have I given to __?”, and “What troubles and difficulty have I caused?”

How to be graceful

4. Learn Prayers of Gratitude. In many spiritual traditions, prayers of gratitude are considered to be the most powerful form of prayer, because through these prayers people recognize the ultimate source of all they are and all they will ever be.

How to be graceful

The Gratitude Project

What if we didn’t take good things for granted? Learn how gratitude can lead to a better life—and a better world—in this new GGSC book.

5. Come to Your Senses. Through our senses—the ability to touch, see, smell, taste, and hear—we gain an appreciation of what it means to be human and of what an incredible miracle it is to be alive. Seen through the lens of gratitude, the human body is not only a miraculous construction, but also a gift.

6. Use Visual Reminders. Because the two primary obstacles to gratefulness are forgetfulness and a lack of mindful awareness, visual reminders can serve as cues to trigger thoughts of gratitude. Often times, the best visual reminders are other people.

7. Make a Vow to Practice Gratitude. Research shows that making an oath to perform a behavior increases the likelihood that the action will be executed. Therefore, write your own gratitude vow, which could be as simple as “I vow to count my blessings each day,” and post it somewhere where you will be reminded of it every day.

8. Watch your Language. Grateful people have a particular linguistic style that uses the language of gifts, givers, blessings, blessed, fortune, fortunate, and abundance. In gratitude, you should not focus on how inherently good you are, but rather on the inherently good things that others have done on your behalf.

9. Go Through the Motions. If you go through grateful motions, the emotion of gratitude should be triggered. Grateful motions include smiling, saying thank you, and writing letters of gratitude.

10. Think Outside the Box. If you want to make the most out of opportunities to flex your gratitude muscles, you must creatively look for new situations and circumstances in which to feel grateful.

How to be graceful

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Being Graceful and elegant isn’t about being feminine or meek. It is more about how you carry yourself. It’s more about not tripping over yourself, appearing in control of your actions and feeling of confidence that exudes to the people around you. People that are more graceful and elegant are treated with more respect and is more approachable in professional settings. A graceful person is also admired by any gender not by their physical appearance, but how they carry themselves with such ease and demeanor. You don’t need to go to etiquette school to become more graceful and elegant. All you need is to try a few of these tips below and practice. These can help foster the grace and elegance that are just hiding inside.

Being Aware of Your Body

When we aren’t as aware of our body, we tend to appear out of focus, indelicate or clumsy. Simply being aware of your whole body can instantly help with being more graceful and elegant. Being comfortable with what you have and understanding how your body moves can prevent you from doing unnecessary actions. For the first few days you are trying to learn about being graceful and elegant, you will start to catch yourself doing things or saying things that you may wonder if it appears indelicate to others. This is a great way to teach yourself about grace and elegance. You don’t need to be knit picky, just being conscious of your actions is sufficient.

Posture

There is something about people with proper posture. They tend to appear more confident, taller and in touch with their body. Learning posture can make a big difference from looking casual to looking elegant and graceful. Try it right now. Go in front of a mirror and practice proper standing, sitting and walking posture, and compare it with how you act casually. You will notice a big difference on you hold yourself. With the right stance you can be more graceful and elegant in a snap. It will be difficult to follow these postures every day and more so if you are not using them. But with enough training you’ll be able to maintain this posture naturally or when you are in an occasion where you are required to be more graceful or elegant.

Dancing

There is an air of grace and elegance in dancers that it can move us. Dancers are able to control their movement with ease, making them smooth and comfortable to look at. You can harness this by learning dancing. This is a great way to train your body about control. Dancing can also help make you more confident with your movement. Dancing such as ballroom dancing and ballet are a great training to make you more graceful and elegant.

Table Manners

Table manners are important, it is essential to being more graceful and elegant. Small things such as chewing with your mouth clothes, not putting your elbow on the table, not eating too fast and so on can make you more sophisticated and give you a bigger chance to be invited again. If you were to dine with people that do not have any table manners, would you eat with them again? There is no need to be prissy, all you need to know about table manners is to respect the people dining with you and avoid things that can make them uncomfortable.

Observe

Do you know someone or admire a celebrity that is graceful and elegant? If you do, try to observe them. How they talk, how other people perceive them and their actions. Just by observing them you will see a difference on how you do it and how they do it. You don’t need to copy them since we are different people and live different lives. This is just a great way to notice small things that you would not notice about your actions that you don’t necessarily see. This is not about being uncomfortable with yourself or pretending to be someone else. Grace and elegance is about looking more aware, confident and strong.

Being graceful and elegant doesn’t have to be about physical beauty. You don’t have to be smaller, smoother, taller and so on. No matter how you look, elegance and grace come from the inside. Being graceful and elegant doesn’t mean that you have to be aloof or rude. It’s about learning to listen and replying at the right instance and length. Grace and elegance aren’t also targeted for women. Men can be graceful and elegant. One of the true signs of grace is being able to move smoothly. Allowing your every move to be deliberate. Getting everything where you want it to be will take some practice.