A quick envisioning exercise could change whom you choose to be your mate.
Posted October 23, 2017
When you’re single and ready for a new relationship, it’s only natural to daydream about your perfect mate. You might imagine what he or she looks like, sounds like, or even smells like. You might dream about what his hobbies are or what it’d feel like to hold her.
Luckily, this natural instinct to daydream about a future love can quickly be transformed into one of the most powerful techniques for attracting your perfect mate.
This technique is called envisioning, and it’s really just daydreaming while holding a specific intention in mind. The intention usually takes the form of a question. Instead of letting your mind wander, you focus on the question, allowing your mind to circle around it. You let yourself mull the question over without being attached to the answers that surface.
Here’s the trick to making this a truly powerful attraction technique: Don’t ask a question about your future mate. Ask one about your future self.
We rarely envision ourselves in our future relationships. We assume we’ll be the same as we are now; that seems like a given. But it’s actually dangerous to view yourself as static. The truth is, you’re changing all the time, and if you’re going to be with someone for a long time — which presumably you would if they were perfect for you — you should expect to change over the course of the relationship.
Your perfect mate should not just be someone who loves who you are today. They should also be someone who wants you to evolve in the way you want yourself to evolve. In other words, they should encourage you to become the person you want to become.
Give this quick envisioning exercise a try: Close your eyes and imagine yourself five years from now. Don’t focus on where you’re living, what you’re doing for work, or what your family looks like. Instead, hone in on your core qualities. How are they different from today? What does it feel like to be you five years from now? Looser? More balanced? Supercharged?
Hold onto this question: What do you want more of in the future? It might be more courage, more freedom, or more self-control. Just ask yourself the question and let yourself dream.
The answers you receive will give you a sense of the direction you want to move in — internally, that is — in the future. Do you want to move toward inner calm and serenity? Do you want to be more fired up and inspired than you are now? Do you want to be more accepting? More outspoken?
This is your internal roadmap of your future self. So, how will it help you attract your perfect mate? If you’re aware of how you want to evolve, then when you meet new people, you can ask yourself: Does this person bring out the qualities in me that I want more of? Would this person support and encourage me to be who I want to be? Or does it feel like they would bring out the opposite?
For example, let’s say you’ve always been cautious and have tended to think through the consequences of every decision. So when you envision yourself in five years, you see yourself more at ease taking risks. You would like to be more spontaneous and free; this is the direction you would like to move in. Does your new love interest seem like the kind of person who would happily move with you in this direction? Would they encourage and support you in freely taking risks? Or would they, consciously or not, lead you to shy away from taking risks? Would they, subtly or overtly, discourage you from acting spontaneously? Do you get the sense they’d want to move in the opposite direction, toward being more structured and disciplined?
A new partner might have perfectly good reasons for wanting less risk in their life, and the two of you might want the same things, in an external sense—children, financial security, etc. But it’s likely that he or she would not bring out the person you really want to become, and this could lead to discontentment in the relationship. You could wake up five years from now and feel like you’re not really the person you want to be.
So, beware of viewing yourself as static. You are dynamic—always moving toward being one type of person and away from being another. Find someone who wants you to become the person you want to become. Choose a partner who loves you now, and will also love the person you’re constantly becoming.
There are tonnns of theories out there about soul mates. Some people believe you have just one, others believe you can have multiple soul mates (romantic or not), and then there are those who prefer the term “twin flame”—which is similar to a soul mate, but not exactly the same thing.
Regardless of what you believe though, you may be thinking exactly what I’m thinking: Uhhh hello?? Where art thou, soul mate.
Now before you hit me with the cliché “when you know, you know,” I recognize it’s not possible to literally plan the time and date to meet your match. But the way I see it, you do have two options: You can sit back, relax, and leave it up to fate, or you can be proactive and manifest that shit yourself.
So because I, too, am extremely eager to find the LOML, I’ve consulted with some experts who have advised on how you can speed up the whole “finding your soul mate” process. Below, your guide to prepping yourself to finding your soul mate:
1. Be yourself (but actually).
FYI: The whole point of a soul mate is that they’re someone who is meant to love you for you, so how are you supposed to find them if you’re not being yourself? Relationship expert Jasbina Ahluwalia, founder of Intersections Match by Jasbina, advises: “Be you unabashedly. Own who you are. If you’re not proud of any part of you, empower yourself to improve that part. If you love you, your soul mate will as well.”
2. Don’t seek perfection.
If you keep a strict vision in your head of what your soul mate should be like, you’ll probably miss out on the person you’re meant to be with. “Your soul mate is usually not who you’ve envisioned, but an entity of love that co-opts a body that mirrors all of your imperfections in a way that makes you love yourself more,” says sexologist Frenchie Davis, host of Libido Talk. “You’ll find your soul mate in what you consider your flaws. It will be the person that admires what you’re afraid to love about yourself.”
3. Take it slow.
“When it comes to finding your soul mate, remember that you can’t rush things,” says dating and relationship expert Laura Bilotta. “It may take a while, but when the timing is right, everything will align,” she says.
If you’re, like, the most impatient person ever though (hi, it me): “Be patient and stay positive. Take some time to work on yourself, think about what you’re looking for and what will make you happy. And if the search for ‘the one’ is getting exhausting, don’t be afraid to take a step back until you’re ready to get back into the dating game so that you can put yourself fully into it. You need to enjoy the ride and trust that your soul mate will come along when you’re ready for them.”
4. Figure yourself out.
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but finding your soul mate is not as easy as Amazon Prime-ing sex toys to your apartment. Dating coach Stef Safran advises you “invest in all parts of your life.” This can look like actively engaging in self care, working out, investing in your interests personally, etc. This way, you can learn more about yourself to find the type of person who would fit best for you.
When you put yourself out there, remember “It’s okay to have a series of bad dates, no dates, or even taking a dating hiatus,” Safran says. “It’s okay to ask for advice and it’s also okay not to accept all the advice you receive. Everyone needs to understand that failure is part of how you succeed and that there is nothing wrong with being single and looking.”
5. Don’t settle.
Sure, it’s important to be understanding and accepting of other people’s flaws, but a soul mate is supposed to be your
, meaning you can’t rush or force this kind of feeling with any random person you match with on Tinder.
Licensed marriage and family therapist Moe A. Brown says: “I encourage anyone who wants to meet their soul mate to do one simple thing: Stand in the mirror and get to know who you are intimately. Who you are in your highest form is the exact energy signature you are looking for. “
6. Look for someone who accepts you for who you are.
You can put effort in from your end, but if the other person doesn’t reciprocate, not much can be achieved. “Find someone who honors and accepts you as you are, strives to understand you and your perspective and feelings, and is willing to work through your differences with respect and compromise,” says relationship expert and author of First Comes Us: The Busy Couple’s Guide to Lasting Love Anita Chlipala.
“Find someone with a commitment to commitment and who is willing to do the work to make the relationship work. A soul mate relationship doesn’t just magically exist–it is intentionally created,” she says.
7. Put in the work.
And finally, once you’ve actually put in the work toward finding your soul mate, it’s time to put effort into maintaining that relationship. “Relationships thrive when you invest in understanding one another’s needs, while also acknowledging that one person cannot fulfill all of your needs—physically, socially, practically, or sexually, says Jess O’Reilly, PhD.
“Becoming soul mates involves open communication that is ongoing and minimizes judgment. You don’t have to have everything in common to become soul mates, but if you’re both willing to put in a similar amount of effort (time, communication, broadening of comfort zones) to make it work, you might find that this facilitates the process of becoming soul mates.”
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Rj De Ja De Janeiro Dating Site Statistics – Find Ideal Mate in Rio De Janeiro
Rio De Janeiro is one of the leading destinations of South America. It offers a variety of excitement and fun intended for the people who are coming to this for holiday seasons and also intended for the travellers who come for virtually every other cause.
Rio De Janeiro Dating Web page Statistics shows that this place can indeed be a great place so you might meet new and fascinating people. People come here from worldwide on holidays and they also come back on their vacations to achieve this exciting and amazing city. This will make it easy for those individuals to find like and also to allow them to find a place where they can find love in an convenient manner.
There are numerous types of folks that come here with regards to holidays. You may have the visitors who choose the purpose of only visiting Rio de janeiro. They come mainly for sports, designed for sailing lessons etc and for the sightseeing. But then you will also find the business people, the experts and even a number of the families come here. So the guests will be able to meet up with a person of their choice in the right place.
The Rio De Janeiro Online dating Site Figures has proven that the number of individuals looking for take pleasure in has been elevating each year. More people are finding it easy to find that special someone and if you are looking for a lover or possibly a spouse, you have to join the best dating internet site. This will give you an idea about the kind of people who go to Rio, this means you will make your choice consequently. These internet dating sites have incredibly appealing dating profiles and also incredibly beautiful single profiles. This helps you to easily match their background with the dating profiles of others.
In the age of online dating, finding a real connection can seem more daunting than ever So, why not stack the odds of finding the right person in your favor? This book offers simple, proven-effective principles drawn from neuroscience and attachment theory to help you find the perfect mate.
Everybody wants someone to love and spend time with, and searching for your ideal partner is a natural and healthy human tendency. Just about everyone dates at some point in their lives, yet few really understand what they’re doing or how to get the best results. In Wired for Dating, psychologist and relationship expert Stan Tatkin–author of Wired for Love–offers powerful tips based in neuroscience and attachment theory to help you find a compatible mate and go on to create a fabulous relationship.
Using real-life scenarios, you’ll learn key concepts about how people become attracted to potential partners, move toward or away from commitment, and the important role the brain and nervous system play in this process. Each chapter explores the scientific concepts of attachment theory, arousal regulation, and neuroscience. And with a little practice, you’ll learn to apply these exercises and practical techniques to your dating life.
If you’re ready to get serious (or not ) about dating, meet your match, and have more fun, this book will be your guide.
Soul Mate Astrology begins where Linda Goodman's Love Signs ends.
Any magazine can tell you which sun signs match up—Pisces and Scorpio is an ideal match—but how about when a Pisces falls for a Sagittarius, or worse, an Aries?
All is not lost. In this ground-breaking book, best-selling author and astrologer Trish MacGregor not only reveals the compatibilities of your sun sign, she uses the nodes of the moon to divulge:
- the hidden compatibilities between you and your lover
- the secrets of your past love lives
- who you're attracted to vs. who you should be attracted to
- how you relate to each other in your relationship
- the strengths and challenges of your relationship
- how you can evolve as a couple while still fulfilling your own respective individual potentials
With Soul Mate Astrology, you'll learn everything you need to know about you and your love life, so you can truly live happily ever after—with a little help from the heavens!
As T.J. MacGregor and Trish J MacGregor, Trish is the author of 35 novels – mysteries, suspense, thrillers, and science fiction. She sold her first novel, In Shadow, to Ballantine Books in 1984. In 2003, she won the coveted Edgar Allan Poe Award for Out of Sight. Her most recent novel, Ghost Key, was published by TOR Books in August 2012.
As Trish MacGregor, she has written dozens of non-fiction books on astrology, the tarot, dreams, and synchronicity. She started out as a freelance magazine writer and eventually became a regular contributor to OMNI Magazine's anti-matter section, which covered UFOs and all aspects of the paranormal. Through those assignments, she met famed abductee Betty Hill, UFO researcher Budd Hopkins, and others.
She has been married to novelist/writer Rob MacGregor for 30 years. They've co-authored numerous self-help books on astrology, dreams, the tarot yoga, and synchronicity. Their most recent book is UFOs in Aliens in the Backyard: UFO Encounters, Abductions & Synchronicities. Their daughter, Megan, is an aspiring writer, and they live in South Florida with three cats and a noble golden retriever.
One of the most effective ways to meet soul mate online is to search the sites Internet meeting. These are platforms set up to allow people who want to form a couple to meet.
more What causes love at first sight? Several substances such as dopamine, oxytocin, adrenaline, vasopressin and the NGF protein play a major role in the phenomenon of love at first sight by acting on the entire human body. Fortunately, not everythingis know qu‘a set of biological variations in love .
How to find your perfect match?
You may already know Match.com, an “affinity” dating site that allows you to us the soul mate by sending singles spotted (or in couple, we are never safe) winks, quizzes or simply chatting.
How to find a soul mate on the Internet? Search on dating sites
One of the most effective ways to meet the soul mate online is to search the sites Internet meeting. These are platforms set up to allow people who want to form a couple to meet.
How to find true love? “Find the love without looking for it ”: 5 tips from an expert
- Learn to love yourself. “We cannot love someone correctly and ask the other to love us correctly without loving ourselves”, attests Céline Colle. .
- Heal his wounds. .
- Change your outlook on life. .
- Attract the right waves. .
- Welcome the love .
How to find a free dating site? The free dating sites
Yes and the best known is jecontacte.com. It is also the only one to be fully free. Others like Pof.com or Badoo.com claim free access but it remains partial. You have to pay to enjoy all the services.
How to find a soul mate at 50?
After all, one of the most common tips when it comes to dating is to be open about everything, including age. If you have 50 years, you can connect with someone 38 as well as someone 62 years.
How to find a partner? How to find le partner ideal in 4 effective actions?
- DEFINE WHAT YOU EXPECT FROM THE LOVE RELATIONSHIP TO BE HAPPY.
- DEFINE WHAT YOU BRING TO THE LOVE RELATIONSHIP.
- BELIEVE IN LOVE AFTER A BREAKUP.
- CHANGE HABITS TO LEAVE CELIBACY.
How to react in the face of love at first sight?
Being with her / him really gives pleasure but is more linked to the image of your couple than to the individual. Likewise, make sure that you haven’t fallen for that “perfect” person as a way to let go of your existential problems.
How to recognize a man who has love at first sight? How to recognize a man who to a love at first sight ?
- First sign of love at first sight at the men : his eyes never leave you. .
- He’s clumsy and nervous. .
- Pay attention to his body language. .
- He takes a deeper voice. .
- He always smiles and sometimes blushes. .
- He is very caring. .
- It is more tactile.
Can love at first sight last?
Intrinsically, the love at first sight not’is not supposed last – vs’is moreover, which explains why it was given this name: the love at first sight hits us, accomplishes its mission and then leaves room for something else. The state of love that it inducesis not eternal.
When will I find love 2021?
On October 19, the stars invite you to take the first step and take the lead.
How to recognize your spiritual soul mate? When you are with your soul mate or, if you are in regular contact with her, you feel enthusiastic and happy. The very idea of being able to see, listen to or read a few messages from your soul mate will generate a feeling of fullness and intense serenity.
What are the married at first sight tests? The contestants of the show are then subjected to different tests like the famous test of personality, the “Big Five” (which relies like sound name suggests on 5 major factors: openness to experience, conscientiousness, extroversion, agreeableness and neuroticism).
Why can’t I find love?
the new valuation oflove and relational development. social and media pressure to show total success. the instabilities and crises of our time which make it more difficult and insecure a “solo crossing” not necessarily of life but of everyday life.
How do you meet someone when you’re not going out? Expand your circle of friends
The easiest way is to widen your circle of friends by meeting new people, because your new friends will know other people and maybe just one of them to become the lucky one.
Why can’t I find anyone? Very often those who deplore find no one are simply not meeting enough people, either because their life is not arranged for, or because the selection at the entrance is too harsh or made on too restrictive criteria.
Which dating site to choose 2020?
Comparison of the best meeting sites serious: our top 6
- # 1 – Meetic. Meetic is the dating website the most famous and renowned general practitioner of all. .
- # 2 – Let’s say tomorrow. .
- # 3 – Elite meet . .
- # 4 – Attractive World. .
- # 5 – Hugavenue. .
- # 6 – eDarling. .
- Attendance. .
Which dating site?
Our comparison of the best meeting sites serious in France
- Elite Meet . Elite Meet is a dating site seriously high de range. .
- eDarling. Everyone knows him ! .
- Meetic. useless de introduce you to Meetic. …
How to meet a man when you are 50 years old? Be open to letting people know you’re single and looking for love. Finding a new relationship through friends or people you know is the most common way to find love. Be open to doing things outside of your usual routine.
How to recognize a man in love at 50?
How to recognize a man in love at 50 ?
- He seeks companionship more than intimate relationships. .
- Mutual aid becomes the glue of the couple. .
- The couple live both together and outside their bubble. .
- Tenderness is at the center of the relationship.
How to find a man at 50? find love to 50 years : confident and dynamic
Worldwide Dating Cost: How to Find an ideal Mate Using the Android Emulator Software
September 1, 2021 2021-09-01T00:00:00+00:00 Uncategorized
Dating cost is one of the biggest barrier to get international internet dating. The cost could be prohibitive, and the majority people simply do not have the financial resources to spend upon international dates. However , there are ways to time cheaper, which include how you can find your true love by using a international seeing software. There are many different types of apps, and one that is now quite popular within the last few years is the android application.
One of the main reasons why world-wide women are unwilling about participating in online dating sites is they fear that other men will scam them out with their money. The fact is, this is rarely a problem, specifically since the many these international online dating sites are free to use. Since the majority of the website customers are free to join, you do not encounter any kind of issues with scammers trying to take your money. This is one of the major causes why a large number of international girls are interested in the android os app.
It is fairly easy to check to find out if the android os app comes with a anti-scam insurance plan. Any dating internet site that is really worth using must have such a plan, as this will dissuade any people who may be seeking to take advantage of you. At the time you visit the website, you will be able to determine if the site provides an anti-scam plan. If it really does, then you will be in good luck; the next step will be to join and become an associate of the international dating price.
When you become a member of the overseas dating cost, you will be instructed to create a no cost account. You need to be able to modify your profile to include reasons for yourself and your passions. Along with your profile, you must also create a cover photo. This will help others upon this website to be able to distinguish https://babydollweddings.com/services/ you. While many brides to be have a natural attraction to other women, it is vital that you do not http://er5325.aisites.com/blog/?m=201906 make this sort of personal information offered to all.
There are some international seeing tips to keep in mind when you download inmate app. First, you must avoid sending images of your self via email or text message. This is because because most of the people on the perform retailer are using cell phones. When you give a picture by using email or text, you run the risk of that photo being intercepted. Second, avoid using your actual name. Many users do not realize that the identity they gave on the account may be the same name that they use very own real life accounts.
A find mate doesn’t necessarily have to be from the region, city, express or country. It can be someone from anywhere that you would be comfortable dating. At the time you download the find companion thai wives for sale application, you will be asked to choose a place. Once you select a location, you may try to find individuals that talk about similar hobbies and interests, interests, treasured movies, television shows, activities, music and more.
If you choose a location, you will then be revealed the very best matches depending on their position. For instance, in case you live in Barcelone, you will see the most suits in Barcelone. On the other hand, should you live in New York City, you will see the most matches in New York City. So , when you visit any web page, make sure the subscribers happen to be of the same towns so that you can without difficulty find your dream spouse.
Once you have chosen the best location, you’re going to be sent an updated set of profiles to view. The advantage of the get mate support is that you can assessment and find the individual with whom you wish to chat online. After getting chosen the individual, now you may communicate by means of SMS or perhaps MMS. You will probably have to ensure that you expect to have an up-to-date Yahoo account or mobile google android app to get into the locate pal service.
The secret to finding an ideal mate is to get out of the house and begin networking as much as possible. Every person you come in contact with is a possible connection to your ideal mate. An estimated 87% of all marriages result from introductions made by other people. Your life will be enriched while meeting new people and doing new things. Just because the person you first meet isn’t your “type” don’t forget they have friends, co-workers and relatives that might prove to be a connection to your ideal mate. See our Relationship Deal Breakers.
As you meet new people please don’t mislead anyone by letting them think you are interested in them on a romantic basis if you are only interested in a friendship. Be open and honest right from the beginning by letting them know you want a friendship . This could save you both embarrassment and hurt feelings later on.
Here are some suggestions of places to go and things to do to find your ideal mate. We also suggest that you read the article: “A Singles Guide to the Newspaper“. It will help you find activities that suit your personal interests. Remember to go where the people go! The best suggestion is at the end of the list so we invite you to read on.
- seminars and/or lectures
- adult education classes
- college courses
- complementary classes at stores
- Join organizations both professional and social
- Church related events or organizations such as Crossroads
- Parents without Partners
- Your children’s events:
- PTA, chaperone outings, day care, recitals, plays and concerts
- Volunteer anywhere. We highly recommend that you do volunteer work. Call the United Way volunteer center in your area. Tell them what you are interested in doing and they will match you up with organizations who need your help. You are under no obligation so keep trying volunteer work until you find the one that is right for you. The beauty of this approach is that you will be contributing to society and yourself while you are meeting new people who share your principles, values, and interests. Now, isn’t that a better way to find someone with common interests than going to the bar? This is an exceptional method for shy and introverted people.
Keep working on your self-love and self-esteem. The more confident and self-accepting you become, the easier it is to attract your ideal mate.
Many people wonder where to get love. Just about anybody AmourFactory sign up the fact that the process can be very murky. Even so, those who have already found like will attest to the fact that it is reality. While there are no selected steps to bringing in your ideal partner, allow me to share a couple of tips to get you started on the right track. Read on to learn how to attract the ideal partner. Here is a quick tips for help you find the soul mate.
First, learn about your self. It is not easy to understand who you probably are. So , try to find out the actual you tick and what precisely makes you exclusive. For example , if you like to travel, you’ll discover that traveling is a superb way to create new friends. If you’re an outdoor person, you are going to meet people who show similar hobbies and tastes. If you’re an outdoorsy person, explore your passions and hobbies to discover who you probably are.
After finding your ideal partner, consider what kind of relationship you want to have. You need to be comfortable spending time with your spouse during the day, and possess a good time laughing together after having a conversation. Sexual intercourse should be a part of your relationship as well. For anyone who is not sure regarding your mate, consider yourself mainly because an open book. The right person will be accessible to exploring fresh ideas and folks. The best human relationships are based on shared respect.
When you have a clear idea of the type of spouse you’d like to particular date, the next step is locating someone you can spend the rest of your life with. Not only when you find someone you can spend the day with, but you also needs to feel comfortable spending period together during the day. You should be able to imagine yourself laughing forever after a good conversation. It is not necessarily uncommon to fall in like over the course of a while of a romantic relationship.
In addition to dating, you must explore the world and discover what you truly like. Many people do not fully know all their true nature. It’s important to check out your interests, interests, and also other areas of life. This will supply you with a better perspective on the particular you tick. Regardless of your personality, you can happy if you find a partner just who values the qualities. When you begin exploring the environment, you’ll be able to entice the right kind of love.
In the day, try to find someone who you can experience spending time with. Most people typically value sex as much as they do appreciate. In addition to the physical, there is no replacement for time put in with a partner. In the end, the two of you has to be able to enjoy each other peoples company. The process of dating is challenging, but it can definitely well worth the effort. Therefore make the most of your time and energy by learning as much as you may.
You should explore the world. Most people can’t say for sure who they are, so it is important to explore the world plus your personality. Moreover to discovering yourself, explore your persona, and other aspects of yourself. You’ll be able to attract the best kind of absolutely adore and help to make it previous. If you want to find love, you should always be open-minded and try to expand your horizons. You happen to be surprised at how you’re able to find the appropriate person for you personally.
You should be open-minded. Being open minded is crucial for finding love. Taking time to learn about the different person is normally an essential component to a healthy romantic relationship. The person that you simply seeing should be somebody you can dedicate your whole time with. In daytime, you should be capable to imagine your self spending good time with them. When you’re during sex, you should be capable of laugh alongside one another for hours.
Love is a two-way process. Both parties must lead to make it work. You have to be normally the one to make the various other person adore you. The other person really should have the same expectations. The relationship can be a mutual work. If the additional person struggles to make you feel comfortable, it’s a chance to move on to a further partner. You need to be open and honest with people you match.
Finding your soul mate is basically finding that one person (arguably one of several) who has the right traits – traits that are relevant to you as an individual. In other words: You have to find a person whom you can put up with and who, more importantly, can put up with you.
Plus all that lovey-dovey stuff, of course. If love isn’t much more than the way that you perceive a person, then you need to find someone who you can perceive as being amazing for as long as you live. Just as importantly, you need to find a person who can put up with all of your sh*t.
Because, let’s be honest, we all have a lot of sh*t that our soul mates will need to put up with. Here are 10 traits that your soul mates should have and that, ipso facto, you should have in his or her eyes:
1. Your soul mate should be very attractive (to you).
Call me shallow, but if you don’t want to sleep with your partner then why the hell do you keep that person around? Sure, there are plenty of other reasons to love someone, but sex is definitely one of the more important ones. Does this mean that your partner needs to live up to the supermodel standard?
I hope not because then 99 percent of the world will be very lonely. What you find attractive is your preference – just make sure that he or she has a face that you’ll be happy seeing every morning for the rest of your life.
2. Your soul mate should share similar likes and beliefs, but not on all fronts.
Having things in common is essential to a loving and caring relationship. For one, it minimizes the amount of arguments, which is very useful in a relationship, and it makes life more enjoyable for both parties. You don’t want to always be doing the things that you hate because your partner loves them.
Sure, you won’t be able to mediate your interests all the time, but having things you like in common definitely helps. At the same time, you don’t want to be too similar; that gets boring. The right person will bring the right balance of new and familiar to the table.
3. Your soul mate should open you up to a new side of life – show you a new reality.
A great life is a life filled with discovery. Discovering new things is exciting and gives you new experiences to look forward to. More than that, the ideal soul mate will show you a better side of life – a side that you didn’t even know existed. Chances are that the person you will end up with is the person who introduces you to a better way of living.
4. Your soul mate has to love you regardless of your flaws and imperfections.
We’re all flawed – we’re human. Loving someone doesn’t mean loving that person because he or she is perfect, but rather because he or she is perfect for you. Many will do their best to hide their imperfections for the duration of their relationships. However, this is impossible.
While I don’t recommend necessarily laying your hand on the table from the get-go, you can’t hide who you really are or you’ll never know if your partner loves all of you and not just the better part of you.
5. Your soul mate has to be capable of regularly putting your needs ahead of his or her own.
Love can arguably be said to be unnatural. It makes us put the needs of another individual ahead of our own – which is not what evolution teaches us should be happening. The beauty of a loving relationship is that we begin to rely upon each other so much that we feel as one and the needs of our soul mate feels more like our own needs than our actual own needs.
If your partner can’t put your needs ahead of his or her own, and you can’t put your partner’s needs ahead of your own, then you’re likely to fail. Of course, we can’t always be putting our partners’ needs ahead of our own – we’re only human. But, we can do our best to show them how much we love them by sacrificing our wants in order for them to meet theirs.
6. Your soul mate should be able and willing to give you the attention that you need.
Different people have a different level of neediness. Personally, I’m on the lighter side of the spectrum. However, there are those who are very, very needy and require a whole lot of attention.
I can’t say that I find this healthy, but hey… not my problem. If you are one of those attention-seeking individuals then you better find someone that is more than willing to give you that attention. Your soul mate will likely be the person who has an identical level of neediness.
7. Your soul mate wants nothing more than to experience life with you because he or she feels that life with you is better than any life without you.
This is a big one. There are only so many versions of our lives that we could possibly live – determinism aside. If you believe that your life cannot be any better than it is when you are with the person whom you love then you may very well have found the right person to spend your life with.
Life is a chain of experiences of which can be experienced with either more or less pleasure. If the person we experience those with make those experiences joyfully memorable then we may have found a keeper.
8. Your soul mate is willing to lose arguments for the sake of keeping the relationship intact.
This is something that took me a long time to learn because, as you may have noticed, I like to argue. It’s not that some battles need to be lost… it’s that some battles simply aren’t worth fighting. Moreover, most of the arguments lovers have aren’t over concrete facts, but over opinion.
Opinions are opinions and we are all entitled to our own. Skip the less important arguments and fight the real important ones instead. Otherwise you are likely to lose what you have. And that’s the only battle worth fighting.
9. The two of you want to live very similar lives.
When we’re younger, we don’t put much thought into lifestyles that we wish to live. Or rather, we don’t think much about the possibility that the lives that we ourselves want to live might not line up with the life that our lover may want to live.
Do you want to travel constantly or stay put? Do you want to be incredibly rich or simply comfortable? Do you want kids? And how many? All these decisions affect different parts of our lives.
It takes a lot of time and energy to do some of the more important things in our lives and because we are sharing our lives with another, both will likely be missing out on certain things. Hopefully those things aren’t incredibly important to our lovers because if they are then we’re setting ourselves up for disaster.
10. Your soul mate is loyal and would never abandon you.
Life can be a bitch. It can make us miserable. It can make waking up in the morning and going about our day near impossible. It can make us moody, unhappy, stressed, rushed, angry, emotional, moody… And that’s fine enough – until you start to share your life with another.
Can you deal with your partner when he or she is going through a rough patch? Can your partner deal with you? How much is simply too much? These are all questions that we have to ask ourselves. Loyalty does go a very long way and is incredibly important in a relationship.
Sometimes we lose control of ourselves and fall down that spiral. Will your lover stick around as you crawl back out of that hole?
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