How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Segal Charles. Euripides’ Medea : Vengeance, Reversal and Closure . In: Pallas, 45/1996. Médée et la violence. pp. 15-44.

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How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Médit et la violence, PALLAS, 45, 1996, pp. 15-44.

Euripides’ Medea: Vengeance, Reversal and Closure

Charles SEGAL (Harvard University)

1. Medea and Violence

In the Medea, as in the Bacchae, Euripides makes us confront the darkest possibilities of human behavior; and no literary criticism can do full justice to the spectacle of violence that, as the chorus says, takes the form that is hardest to comprehend, a mother turning murderously upon her own children. Nowhere else in Euripidean tragedy is there a greater gulf between a major character’s rational justification for a course of action (Medea’s revenge) and the emotional impact of that action when it unfolds on the stage (her murder of her young children). Interpreters, beginning with the chorus, are of course tempted into finding explanations. Walter Burkert viewed the death of the children as a sacrificial act that harks back to the ritual origins of tragedy.1 Pietro Pucci brilliantly studied the dialectics of a “remedial discourse of pity” that plunges us into the suffering in order to help us face the pain of life.2 Others have seen the play as a reflection of a moral nihilism or of a new tension between the individual and the polis on the eve of the Peloponnesian War.3 However one tries to account for the violence, the play retains its power to shock and alarm even in our atrocity-worn age.4

Burkert 117-19. Burkert’s emphasis on the sacrificial imagery of 1053f., however important

for the historical origins of tragedy, has only a limited significance for the Medea, where the

sacral element is marginal. For a critique of Burkert and for other implications of theme of

sacrifice see Pucci 132ff., McDermott I4ff., 76 ; Rabinowitz 149. For a recent survey of

various approaches to the play see Kovacs (1993) 46-48.

Pucci 45ff., 163ff. Pucci well recognizes the ambivalence of Euripides’ message, the “desire

to exploit the abyss that language opens in itself (p. 166).

For moral nihilism see McDermott 70ff. and 116ff. ; for the tension between individual

and polis see R. Friedrich 236-39.

McDermott’s recent monograph effectively registers the sense of shock and horror without

attempting to fit them into the framework of an intellectualizing explanation. For a careful

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

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The day after Senate Republicans acquitted him in his impeachment trial, Donald Trump attended the National Prayer Breakfast, where the president took some not-so-subtle shots at Sen. Mitt Romney (R-Utah). As a rule, presidents don’t use this event to settle scores and air grievances against perceived enemies, but Trump apparently couldn’t help himself.

Soon after, as part of a bizarre hour-long event at the White House, he was even more aggressive toward a wide range of foes, including Romney. Referring to the Utah senator’s vote to convict the president on one impeachment count, Trump said, “[T]he only one that voted against was a guy that can’t stand the fact that he ran one of the worst campaigns in the history of the presidency.”

For what it’s worth, in Romney’s 2012 bid for national office, he received 47% of the vote. Four years later, Trump received 46% of the vote. If Romney ran “one of the worst campaigns” ever, I’d love to hear why Trump couldn’t quite match his vote total.

Regardless, the president’s comments were emblematic of a larger truth: Trump has what Politico described as a “revenge list,” and his shots at Romney were little more than an “opening salvo.”

Indeed, the Washington Post noted another name on the same list.

President Trump is preparing to push out a national security official who testified against him during the impeachment inquiry after he expressed deep anger on Thursday over the attempt to remove him from office because of his actions toward Ukraine.

Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman — a National Security Council aide who testified during House Democrats’ impeachment hearings — will be informed in the coming days, likely on Friday, by administration officials that he is being reassigned. Trump is eager to make a symbol of the Army officer soon after the Senate acquitted him of the impeachment charges approved by House Democrats.

Remember, Vindman’s serious misdeed, in the eyes of Trump World, is telling the truth and playing by the rules. The president appears eager to kick Vindman out of the White House, not only to punish the decorated war hero, but also to discourage others who may be tempted to act as honorably as Vindman did.

What’s more, there’s no reason to believe the “revenge list” is short. White House Press Secretary Stephanie Grisham declared during a Fox News interview yesterday, “People should be held accountable.”

Last week, CBS News reported that key GOP senators had received stern warnings: those who cross the White House on impeachment, the report said, would find their head “on a pike.” As part of the trial proceedings, House Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff (D-Calif.), the lead impeachment manager, mentioned the CBS News report, prompting Senate Republicans to feign apoplexy. How dare a Democrat, GOP senators said, suggest that their gracious and forgiving leader would stoop to retaliating against those who disappoint him.

Perhaps some of the Republicans who whined the loudest could take a moment to revisit their concerns now.

As we discussed the other day, Sen. Lamar Alexander (R-Tenn.) stood on the Senate floor in October 2009, and issued “a friendly suggestion” to President Obama and his White House: “Don’t create an enemies list.”

Want some great revenge pranks to get back at someone? Read the following article for some great ones.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Want some great revenge pranks to get back at someone? Read the following article for some great ones.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Somebody did something to you, pulled a fast one on you and basically made you feel stupid or angry or humiliated? What are you going to do? You could sit back and take it, or let it go, or you could play some harmless revenge pranks on the poor buggers. But the question is―do you know of any? ‘Cause if you really want to get back at someone, you need to have really great pranks up your sleeve and a guarantee that they’ll work. Simply refer to the following article and borrow a few ideas from here.

Pranks on Friends

You know the popular adage―’With friends like you, who needs enemies?’… Seems to fit perfectly for some, right? So for them who’ve taken special care to bring this into action―here are some unique pranks. Use them well.

Underwear Scare

This one’s a mean trick. But totally worth every guffaw and snort it’ll induce. Buy an abnormally ugly cut, shockingly psychedelic printed pair of underpants and write your friends name on it. Then at a party or any gathering where your group of friends are present, put them on a hook in the washroom or throw them on the floor. All evening through there will be secret laughs and whispered comments.

Cell Phone Mishap

If you can manage to get your hands on their cell phone, this revenge prank will be really something. When they are in the bath, take their cell phone and change all their speed dial numbers to completely random ones or better still, change them to some that your friend is no longer in touch with. Then watch the confusion. When he/she finally figures it out and changes it back, find the phone and do it all over again.

Beach Fall

When at the beach, wait for your friend to go to the washroom and then quickly dig a hole under the beach towel or mat that he/she was sitting on. Then place the towel as it was before. Sit back and watch while they come and plop into the sand.

Grease Up!

This one’s simple. Take some grease and place small dollops of it on spots around the house that you know your friend will usually touch―the door knob, cupboard handles, and shower faucets. Place them so that the grease cannot be seen. Do this over a few places and not just one. This will make him so suspicious of everything around the house. Running gag!

Pranks on Neighbors

Neighbors can be a menace sometimes. What did they do this time? Squeal on you? You can get back to them with these pranks.

Bird Tweets

Here’s one that will annoy the hell out of the neighbors. Buy an electronic bird call machine and place it in your neighbor’s home. Then start operating it… at any odd hour of the day. The neighbors will be frazzled trying to find the bird when it clearly does not exist.

Detergent Water

The next time your neighbor goes out to water the garden, there will be a surprise waiting for him. Pour some detergent into the hose pipe, near the main connection, so that when he opens the hose a frothy, foamy jet of water will greet his garden.

Smelly Room

Buy some stink spray and spray it discreetly in their garden or living room or whichever place you have access to. Make sure you are not caught or there will be hell to pay. Then let the smell percolate around. It’ll take days for them to finally get rid of the smell! This prank is a little below the belt so use it only if you really, really must.

Pranks with Cars

Using tissue to ambush the car or a house is really an old revenge prank. Use one of these more creative ones.

Turd Attack

How irritating is it to be greeted with crow droppings/pigeon droppings on your car? Very! So take that a notch higher. This one’s gross so don’t say I didn’t warn you. Buy some brown clay and mix some corn or carrot pieces in it to make it look like dog poop. Now place this on a strategic location. If you can manage the car seat, there will be nothing like it. Imagine the torture your neighbor will face.

Flat Tires

Blow some balloons and place them in front of the back tires of the car. When they start the car, they’ll get a blown out sound. Works best at night when they can’t see the tires.

Note Scare

Here’s a scary prank to play―leave a note on the window or tucked in the wipers saying ‘Sorry for the horrible damage to the car. Will pay back after I’m back from the hospital’. Of course there is no damage. Then you watch from a distance as they frantically try to find something.

It’s not called sweet revenge for nothing. So now that you have these really practical (and rather harmless) revenge pranks, I say you go try them out and lead the revenge prank war!

This was always the plan, Dotemu’s Cyrille Imbert said. The French studio, known for its restorations and remasterings of several 1990s hits, spent the past decade earning a reputation for carefully and respectfully handling other companies’ properties. Now, Dotemu’s developers are getting the dream assignments they wanted all along: make all-new sequels for things they loved as kids themselves.

The process has culminated, again, in Windjammers 2, Dotemu’s wholly original sequel to the 1990 Pong-meets-beach-volleyball classic, which launched last week for Google Stadia, Nintendo Switch, PlayStation 4, Windows PC, and Xbox One. (It’s also available on Xbox Game Pass.) Imbert’s studio remastered the original in 2017 for PlayStation 4 and Nintendo Switch after hunting down the rights owner — Paon DP, which bought Windjammers and other Data East franchises out of that company’s liquidation.

“I went to Japan with a pitch, but with the idea of doing both,” Imbert said. “First, a remaster, to relaunch the hype around the game, make it known again. And then, once we reached that goal […] we could launch a sequel, because it just makes sense; there never has been a sequel from the original [Windjammers], and there are so many things that can be improved, and worked on, that weren’t present.”

The same two-stage, long game approach to getting their hands on others’ IP has paid off in three other highly visible projects Dotemu has developed and/or published. The approval for 2020’s highly successful Street of Rage 4 grew out of a 2017 remake of Wonder Boy 3: The Dragon’s Trap, a 1989 game for the Sega Master System. Metal Slug Tactics, coming sometime this year, is an all-original follow-up to four re-releases of SNK’s Metal Slug series on modern platforms between 2012 and 2013.

Lob shots are a new tactic in Windjammers 2, but they can also set up your opponent for a big spike. Image: Dotemu

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Shredder’s Revenge, developed by Tribute Games, is also coming this year to Nintendo Switch and Windows PC. Nickelodeon came knocking after Wonder Boy: The Dragon’s Trap panned out successfully for both Sega and Dotemu. Shredder’s Revenge is an all-new side-scrolling brawler, timelessly picking up where Konami’s beat-’em-ups left off almost 20 years ago.

Windjammers 2, though, seems to be a genuine labor of love. Nothing would have prevented Dotemu from deriving its own brand of disc volleyball under another name. It probably would have been easier than tracking down not only the rights holders, but also consulting with the original developers, and even roping in the first game’s composers to update the chiptune soundtrack with real instruments.

Impressions: Windjammers 2 breaks the Neo Geo cycle

Imbert rejected a Windjammers knock-off for a simple reason: “It wouldn’t be Windjammers,” he said. “We were so attached to the original game. There was this … this … this need of working on that license, in particular, because everything was so cool about it.”

It makes sense. Windjammers’ gameplay concept is solid but simple, leaving it to a Jock Jams 1990s aesthetic — hand-drawn, comic book visuals with pastel colors and halftone screening — to make the game memorable. Again, Dotemu could have copied these themes, but there’s no way the work would have had as much creative conviction as a fully licensed sequel, Imbert reasoned.

“Doing something that will look and feel exactly the same, but will not be Windjammers, would feel [like] kind of a treason, you know, for the people who worked on the game back in the day,” Imbert said.

Windjammers 2 continues its predecessor’s subtle blending of fighting game tactics applied to a sport, with new shot types and stage effects to update and differentiate the gameplay. Players now have access to lob shots, curve shots, and other power moves to deceive their opponents and run them across the court. They can also leap into the air for a kind of spike-shot, forcing their opposition into split-second reactions and mistakes that follow.

“When you look at the true players of the original Windjammers now, they have mastered the game so well that it’s almost paper, rock, scissors,” Imbert said. “They know exactly what they’re going to do, and it’s more about endurance. But if you add more and more depth, give them more strategies and strategic choices, it’s like reshuffling the cards for everyone. You know, the pro players, but also the completely new incoming players, who want to practice more and explore those new rules to create completely new tactics and strategies.”

Dotemu even went searching for — and found — Seiichi Hamada, a still-performing bassist who worked on the original game’s soundtrack almost 30 years ago. They collaborated with Hamada and Harumi Fujita on the original soundtrack for Windjammers 2, whose synthesizer and slapping bass do as much to communicate the game’s Neo Geo bonafides as the visuals.

“We don’t need to ask ourselves too many questions,” Imbert said. “The core aspect of every game that we’ve been bringing back is the same, because that’s what we want to see. We don’t want to see something that completely changes it, either.”

The first volume of Afro Samurai 2 has so many problems that aren’t just glaring, but offensive, be it to your eyes, ears, or moral sensibilities, that no one will finish this slog without something to complain about. Revenge of Kuma is the first game in the episodic follow-up to 2009’s well-received Afro Samurai. Like its predecessor, it portrays a society that embodies an unusual mix of samurai and hip-hop cultures. The soundtrack’s strong beats and confident rhymes set the mood as you clash swords over the course of your journey, but any goodwill earned by Revenge of Kuma’s tone is rapidly discounted when you try to engage with it on any other level.

The game introduces neophytes to Jinno, an orphan-turned-martial-artist who failed to take his own life in the first Afro Samurai game. He’s been rebuilt as the bionic warrior, Kuma, who dons the head of a stuffed bear. Goofy headgear aside, Kuma has potential on a conceptual level: more machine than man, he is insusceptible to the dark temptations that surround him. This potential is never realized.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Revenge of Kuma is anything but subtle.

Your interest in Kuma’s character is lost the moment Afro Samurai 2 attempts to explore the depths of his past. As you traverse Kuma’s old stomping grounds, you’re meant to confront the phantoms of those he’s lost. It’s an emotionally ripe setup, but when your mission objective is so literal–“Confront the reality that everyone you love is dead, and their memories are all you have”–there’s nothing to glean from walking in Kuma’s shoes. You walk up to characters frozen in time while shrill screams fill the air, one after another. Revenge of Kuma doesn’t go to the trouble of working for your sympathy; it naively demands it.

The script at large is drowned in impish indulgences, including references to modern-day celebrities–musician Drake and former boxer Mike Tyson come up in conversation–and needless, rampant swearing. I have no problem with such language in principle, but like Moira Burton in Resident Evil: Revelations 2, Afro Samurai 2’s script is soured by this forced edginess.

Afro Samurai 2 needlessly objectifies women for the sake of nothing but titillation and attitude. The reverb from this particular blare of ignorance is deafening.

One scene in particular stands out as egregiously offensive and juvenile. Upon entering a bar filled with women in g-strings (and nothing else), you’re confronted by slow zooms and pans on a stripper in the center of the room. An equally-naked DJ calls for your head, but not before the camera shifts to a close-up of her exposed, undulating body. This scene is justified by the plot as a place where men gather, but that premise–because the setting could have been a number of other less salacious locations–is a farce. There’s no explicit need to showcase nipples for minutes on end for the story to accomplish its goal. To add insult to injury, upon meeting your mark after your battle with the DJ, he repeatedly refers to her as “that dead bitch.” Afro Samurai 2 needlessly objectifies women for the sake of nothing but titillation and attitude. The reverb from this particular blare of ignorance is deafening.

No, I’m not referring to the soundtrack, which is the only thing resembling “good” in the game. Elsewhere, Afro Samurai 2’s audio can be literally painful. There are countless moments when one character or sound effect becomes many times louder than anyone or anything else, leading to extreme discomfort. While I may not have picked up on the nuanced lyrics as I engaged in combat, the soundtrack got under my skin, instilling bravado in ways the game otherwise fails to do, fleeting as it is.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

I don’t feel so good.

I wish I could say that its combat mechanics shine through as an exception to Afro Samurai 2’s myriad problems, but they’re as sloppy and incoherent as the rest of the game. You primarily use one button to create simple combos and another to block incoming attacks. When an enemy comes in for an attack, a button prompt appears over their head. In theory, you would have the full duration of the prompt to deflect an incoming attack, but there’s instead a vague window of success within the life of a prompt. You stand a better chance of winning if you simply remain on the offensive, though the wild, needlessly acrobatic animations often take you halfway across the screen.

You eventually learn special attacks that are tied to three different fighting styles, but it’s a hollow system–with zero added benefit–that unnecessarily complicates things. As you engage with your enemies, you randomly earn skill points. In one fight with a few common enemies, I earned eight, and I had no idea why. The arbitrary dispersal is magnified by the fact that you only need 28 points to unlock everything under Kuma’s three skill trees, though you can’t unlock the final abilities in each tree because they’re locked until the next episode. Just as confusing is the structure of skill trees themselves. Reaching a point on a skill path doesn’t mean you can unlock the next buff or ability–the game wants you to jump to another branch of the tree first in some cases, negating the reason for the tree-like structure in the first place.

Every moment brings new problems to light, and it doesn’t take long before you want to put the controller down and walk away.

You probably get by now that Revenge of Kuma isn’t worth your time, and I haven’t even mentioned the confusing world map, the abrupt transitions between cutscenes and gameplay, the horrible frame rate, the dumbed-down boss fights, and the litany of technical glitches I encountered, including getting stuck in geometry or having to restart the game because it crashed altogether. Every moment brings new problems to light, and it doesn’t take long before you want to put the controller down and walk away. Revenge of Kuma makes for a better album than a game, but I wouldn’t recommend buying it for that reason either, since you’re required to suffer the game to listen to music that’s trapped within.

In the words of Revenge of Kuma: Confront the reality that everything you loved about the first Afro Samurai game is dead, and your memories are all you have.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

This trope, which happens a lot in the less idealistic revenge stories (insofar as revenge stories can get idealistic), demonstrates the fundamental flaw in the common warping of the moral maxim “do unto others as you want others to do unto you” into “Do unto others what they did unto you”.

The actual Golden Rule is about always attempting to look at things from the perspective of others, freely forgiving wrongs, and believing that no one should have to suffer at all, even if they deserve to. This warped form, however, takes this literally as Newtonian Equivalent Exchange “justice” or Call It Karma, not taking into account that acts of revenge/justice are not quantifiable laws of physics but social phenomena. Because of the complex web of genetic and social bonds that one forms over a lifetime, as well as the interactions between everyone entangled in that web, revenge might well begin with you but it most likely will not end with you. If he deserved to be treated how he treated you, his loved ones may also believe that you deserve to be treated like you treated him too. And yours may believe the same. And so on and so forth. It gets worse if it involves racism, fantastic or otherwise. The result of this is frequently what is called a Blood Feud or Vendetta.

Frequently in these stories, no side is completely wrong, no one is really right, both are very understandable, and such stories are usually painful to watch. Moral Myopia often deepens it, when both sides think that treating one of theirs is worth treating a dozen of the others, and so attempt to inflict that many torments and deaths in retribution. The escalating body count creates a vicious circle that spreads out like a virus, causing more and more casualties as it goes on, until it ends with one party (if not both of them) getting wiped out entirely or being stopped.

The Cycle of Revenge is one way to show that “two wrongs make a right” is a logically fallacious claim by deconstructing its use as justification for vengeance. It, more often than not, results in A Tragedy of Impulsiveness. Revenge Is Not Justice is often invoked to deter people from revenge or to call them out for following through with their revenge.

It’s also very common in gangster stories, with the average gangster character avenging the death of a friend upon a rival gangster who may very well have had a similar motivation for his killing, as well as Romeo and Juliet-style Feuding Families stories. A lesser form of this tends to occur when two characters have a prank competition.

Very unfortunate Truth in Television, and Older Than Feudalism; the Lensman Arms Race and Serial Escalation of vengeance upon vengeance makes up much of the history of the human race, with examples like the infamous assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand which triggered World War I which then fueled Germany’s Roaring Rampage of Revenge in World War II, and blood feuds elsewhere that are still going on to this very day, with no one remembering just what started it, but motivated by all the violence that followed, with each successive revenge motivating the victims or others connected to them to strike back at the one who took the initial revenge.

A note on the “eye for an eye” maxim: many ethnologists believe that this wasn’t a demand to go out and seek revenge, but rather a ban on inflicting Disproportionate Retribution (so if someone blinds you in one eye, you can only half-blind them back, and cannot justify torture or murder). According to this theory, those who laid down this rule believed that this limitation would ensure satisfaction of the Golden Rule for everyone and put a brake on the entropy of such vicious cycles.

According to another theory, espoused by Jewish rabbis, the Hebrew actually implies that monetary compensation can be given in place of the eye, with the amount of the compensation to be the same regardless of whose eye was harmed (hence, “eye for an eye”). Unfortunately, given human nature in general, people didn’t much listen (especially when “monetary compensation” simply led to unjust instances of Screw the Rules, I Have Money!), and as a result — as Mahatma Gandhi, a well-known nonviolence activist, is supposed to have put it — “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.”

Kind of makes you wish someone, in an attempt to counter this cancerous mutation of the Golden Rule, learned to Turn the Other Cheek or ask for (and give) Forgiveness, or at least just deliver a Restrained Revenge. But it rarely works, as chances are you’ll be punished anyway (for extra salt in the wounds, the enemy in question, especially if a Jerkass who deserved it, will continue their misdeeds unhampered, continuing to ruin the lives of people, you still being one of them). Or you could just exterminate the opposing party until there’s no one left to want revenge on you. But it rarely works, because there’s always a survivor. Or everyone can agree to only take revenge against the wrongdoing individual and to not avenge those who deserved what they got, but Moral Myopia and Poor Communication Kills tend to get in the way. Or as Romeo and Juliet proposed, we can try The Power of Love. But this rarely works either, so.

Used poorly, this trope can come off as a False Dichotomy, suggesting that if someone kills your loved one then your options are to either kill their loved one or let the person who killed your loved one get away with it. In reality you can narrow your revenge only to the guilty party (i.e. if you kill my loved one then I’ll kill you but spare your loved one). Of course then your enemy’s loved ones might try Avenging the Villain. After all, if he was evil to you, it doesn’t mean he may not have been loving to them.

See Best Served Cold, Feuding Families, He Who Fights Monsters, Remember the Alamo, Revenge Myopia, Roaring Rampage of Revenge, Then Let Me Be Evil, and You Killed My Father. Reciprocal altruism (and, indeed, friendship in general) is quite possibly the flip side of this coin. Sometimes overlaps with Chicken-and-Egg Paradox if there’s no obvious reason for the cycle to have started in the first place.

T hey call it “the herpes of the craft world”. “They” being some Machiavellian Australians who have launched a website that lets you anonymously ship glitter to your enemies. For just A$9.99 (£5), you can reduce grown men to fairy princesses and provide your frenemies with hours of vacuuming fun. For years, your victim will find specks of glitter everywhere they go. They will serve as ineradicable sparkles of your vengeance. Best of all, you will be able to exert great power without feeling great responsibility. I mean, it’s glitter, right? Who can stay mad at glitter?

But don’t get too excited: has become a victim of its own success. The site launched on Monday and then crashed within hours because of the level of demand. It seems there are an awful lot of people out there who have been waiting all their lives for a site offering glitter-based revenge with international delivery options. At the time of writing, the website was back up, but all services were temporarily suspended because “you guys have a sick fascination with shipping people glitter”.

So disappointing. What is an ethical avenger to do now? Don’t worry, while our Australian friends get their glitter game back on track, here are some other ways you can be kind to be cruel.

1. Cover your enemies in Goop

This is pretty much the glitter trick, just with lifestyle advice. At first your nemesis will be thrilled that you have signed them up to Goop, Gwyneth Paltrow’s blog and email newsletter. They’ll discover food allergies they never knew they had! They’ll learn how to crochet quinoa! Soon, however, the interminable emails will become a nuisance. Your nemesis will decide they’ve had enough. But no matter how many times they hit that unsubscribe button, they will find trying to consciously uncouple from the site to be nigh impossible. Somewhere deep inside their soul, like a speck of glitter on otherwise spotless cashmere carpet, Gwyneth will be present, and she will be judging.

2. Switch their regular coffee for decaf

Can you tell the difference? Photograph: Alamy

As Marx would have said if he’d ever come across a Starbucks: caffeine is the amphetamine of the people. It can traumatise the body and wreak havoc on the soul. You can read more in-depth reporting about this in this excellent Goop post: “Foods that cause pain.” So save your caffeine-dependent foes from themselves via this simple but powerful caffeine trick. Their adrenal glands will thank you for it. Their sanity won’t.

3. Turn them into a laughing stock-shot

Gosh! You tell your selfie-obsessed frenemy. You have the sort of face that could grace a thousand articles, advertisements, and corporate websites. Have you ever thought of a career as a stock photography model? Having planted this lucrative seed in your narcissist-nemesis’s mind, sit back and watch as their mugshots take on a life of their own. Perhaps the Guardian will use their photo to illustrate an advice column headlined “I fantasise about group sex with old, obese men”. Or maybe they will pop up, nestling a watermelon and a gun, in a Buzzfeed listicle of unexplainable stock photos. The possibilities are endless.

4. Send them on a cruise

Wave goodbye to your enemies. Photograph: Britt Erlanson/Getty Images

5. Sign them up to a niche dating website

This revenge-hack kills two annoying birds with one stone by using the power of niche dating websites to find your nemesis the love they so richly deserve. If they like bad boys, I suggest If they find sharing difficult, then connect them with an Ayn Rand enthusiast over at The Atlasphere. Or just find them a Sea Captain Date in the hope that you’ll never have to see them again. There’s something for everyone online!

6. Leave them a ton of voicemails

This is one of the most egregiously irritating things you can do to a person in the 21st century.

7. Flood their inbox with inspirational quotes

But make sure they are also slightly passive-aggressive. “Silence does not always mark wisdom,” said Samuel Taylor Coleridge. “Every artist was first an amateur,” said Ralph Waldo Emerson. The recipient will feel motivated, but also slightly denigrated.

8. Name an unflattering theorem after them

This is a long-term play that requires you discovering some sort of unpleasant fact that you can then prove with equations and name after someone you dislike. However, assuming you can do all the above, you will be rewarded via the Third Law of Spiteful Science: a body, once immortalised by science, will feel grateful for this afterlife, yet mortified by their legacy. Take Murphy, for example, forever associated with the idea that anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. Not to mention Pavlov’s poor dog, whose psychic secretions will never be forgotten.

And finally …

The above examples are for illustrative purposes only: please do not try any of these at home. Specifically, if I find myself suddenly signed up to any Goop newsletters I will respond swiftly and with glitter.

After establishing a foothold in England, Eivor rides north to meet with Ubba and Ivarr, the sons of the great King Ragnar Lothbrok. During their quest to depose King Burgred of Mercia and their loyal war thegn, Leofrith, Eivor makes many new friends and enemies.

However, it’s up to you to decide the fate of the great warrior. Here’s what happens when you either kill or spare Leofrith in Assassin’s Creed Valhalla.

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Assassin’s Creed Valhalla – Should you kill or spare Leofrith?

While it might not be the Viking way to show mercy to your enemies, there are many subtle hints at a wedge between King Burgred and Leofrith through the Kingmaker story arc – not least Coelbert, son of the Ragnarsson-backed usurper, Coelwulf, vouching for his good character.

After storming the fortress of Tamworth, you can find a letter from Leofrith to a family member, stating his reluctance to continue the fight against the Danes. It turns out that he only does so out of loyalty and a will to protect King Burgred’s subjects, who suffer because of their leader’s obstinance.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

What’s more, when you caught up with King Burgred, if you read the letter in his chamber, you find out he sent Leofrith into an unwinnable battle, knowing he’d die, calling him “a loyal rat and nothing more”.

This could suggest that the moral choice is to spare Leofrith’s life.

However, there’s also the matter of the Viking belief in an honorable death on the battlefield. In the heat of the moment, Leofrith is content with his choice, and you have bested him in combat.

If you choose to kill Leofrith:

  • Coelbert will be dismayed at your choice, but take some comfort in the idea of an honorable death
  • Zealots around the world map will actively hunt you down, and are extremely difficult foes
  • King Burgred will be exiled to Rome

If you choose to spare Leofrith:

  • Coelbert is surprised by your decision, and thoughtful about the philosophy behind Eivor’s choice
  • Leofrith warns you about the Zealot kill order that’s been dispatched, unlocking a secondary quest to stop them from actively hunting you
  • Leofrith alludes to following Burgred to Rome, impling that he will take revenge


Regardless of whether you choose to kill or spare Leofrith, Ubba and Ivarr Ragnarsson will be pleased with the outcome of the story arc, and pledge to help the Raven clan should the need arise.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Coelwulf also promises an alliance, and asks Sigurd to take care of Coelbert in Ravensthorpe until he can tighten his grasp on the now unstable kingdom of Mercia.

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About the Author

James suffers so you don’t have to. Whether it’s raging so hard at Sekiro that he bit his own hand, or confronting a 20-year fear of zombies to complete Resident Evil 2 eight times, he creates guides and reviews for the biggest blockbuster games.

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The Terminator? Batman? Godzilla? They were all part of the weird mix in Sega’s Revenge Of Shinobi.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

This article comes from Den of Geek UK.

From the output of Cannon Films to the cartoons and comics of those Teenage Turtles, ninjas were all over the place in the 1980s. And while there were lots of other pretenders to the crown, few ninja-themed videogame franchises were as consistently excellent as Sega’s Shinobi.

The first game emerged in 1987, and it was a methodical yet entertaining action-platformer. Introducing the stealthy hero Joe Musashi, Shinobi was popular enough to spread from the amusement arcade to just about every home system imaginable, including the Nintendo Entertainment System, PC Engine, ZX Spectrum, and Sega’s own Master System.

The franchise’s finest hour came in 1989 with Revenge Of Shinobi one of the Sega Genesis’ earliest releases, and a perfect showcase for what the 16-bit console could do. It sees Joe Musashi face off against another evil organisation, and the action this time is far more imaginative and varied; levels take place in traditional Japanese castles, on busy highways, in factories and on the roofs of moving trains. To keep up with the faster pace, Joe’s also more athletic than ever, with a deadly somersault (which allows him to throw eight shuriken across the screen) making short work of rank-and-file enemies.

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How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

During his fight against evil, Joe Musashi will encounter John Rambo doppelgangers; a boss that looks uncannily like the Terminator, a giant kaiju clearly modelled after Godzilla, not to mention a heated battle against Spider-Man and Batman. It’s difficult to know exactly what Sega was thinking when it threw all these characters into Revenge Of Shinobis mix; what is clear is that the company quickly figured out that it might get into a spot of legal trouble.

Over on The Cutting Room Floor – an indispensible site if you like rooting through the data of old videogames – we get to see all the revisions that Sega made to Revenge Of Shinobi in quick succession. While the packaging and cartridge remained the same, the data stored within went through no fewer than four changes during the game’s original release.

One of the first things to be altered, it seems, was the John Rambo lookalike; the enemy sprite, which in the original version has the same curly black mane of hair and red bandana as the iconic action hero, was altered to a more anonymous, bald henchman in the first revision.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

The Spider-Man graphics also underwent a subtle change, though interestingly, this was actually to make the character look more like the one in the comic books. This was because, unlike the Rambo, Batman and Godzilla characters, Sega did actually have a license to use Spider-Man – around the same time, Sega had made an official tie-in game featuring Marvel’s webslinger, so the decision was made to include him in Revenge Of Shinobi.

Quite what Marvel would have made of him playing one of the end-of-level bosses, we can only guess.

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How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Sega appeared to run into more problems with the sprites that resembled Batman and Godzilla, however. The game’s second revision makes several changes to the sprites so that the boss – which is obviously modelled on the Caped Crusader, right down to his pointy bat ears and yellow utility belt – into a more monstrous-looking creature with horns, a tail and furry legs like a goat.

Some have suggested the sprite looks more like the DC comics villain Man-Bat in this revision; others have pointed out the similarity between it and Go Nagai’s Devilman, an anti-hero who’s hugely popular in Japan to this day.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Japanese players would also have recognised the giant monster at the end of round seven; sure, the pointy fins are missing, but it’s very obviously based on Toho’s Godzilla, perhaps the most famous kaiju of them all.

In this 2003 interview, Revenge Of Shinobi director Noyishi Ohba diplomatically describes the beast as a ‘brontosaurus’; this clearly didn’t wash with everyone, because the sprite was changed in a second revision. Essentially, the monster became a giant walking skeleton – Sega clearly figured that, without its skin, Godzilla isn’t really Godzilla anymore.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Level four’s boss, the one modelled on Arnold Schwarzenegger and the Terminator, remained the same in all versions – he still has the shades, the bulging muscles and the flat-top hair, and when he’s sufficiently damaged, his skin will vanish to reveal the gleaming endoskeleton hiding beneath. Maybe Sega thought that a mash-up of the Terminator and the Hulk (the boss also glows green and throws cars around) would be enough to throw lawyers off the scent.

Jesus offers an interesting response. “Who made me your judge?” The man might have replied, “You are the son of God, avenge me!” Or at least, he might have been thinking that.

Now I know there is a lot of theology out there that says when we die, we will be judged, but Jesus seems to deny that here. He also denies that idea a number of other times in the Gospels. We are already and always being judged and asked to evaluate our actions. Call it our conscience, call it the Holy Spirit, call it guilty feelings, or whatever you want, but those senses of having done wrong are a deep part of what it means to be human. Though Jesus denies being a judge, Judging the man who asked the question, in the moment, is actually what he is subtly doing. To be blunt, the judgement of God is not an after-death judgement. It is happening today.

We want other people to be judged, we perhaps long for a time when God will punish “those people,” but that ultimately goes against the deep core message of Jesus. If we return to God, we are forgiven. God forgives and forgets. Period. So, if we are forgiven, then what is there to be judged on when we die? Yes, I know long held traditions don’t change easily, but this is a powerful issue upon which to meditate.

The reality is we want there to be a judgement because we think it is not fair that other people might get away with actions that we are not able to get away with, or we have no power to get revenge, so we want God to take that revenge for us.

There is another reality. No one, absolutely no one, knows what is going on in the hearts and minds of another person. We have no idea how they might be suffering in a self-imposed emotional hell on earth. Perhaps we might all be a little more compassionate and less judgmental. We also have no idea what will happen after death, how God will eternally interact with us, or what we will experience. We live in hope of the abundant and eternal promise that Jesus offers. What Luke tells us over and over in his Gospel is that we can experience that eternal hope, the presence of the eternal Kingdom now, in subtle ways, when we follow the Way of Jesus. We don’t have to wait for the kingdom just as we are not waiting for judgement. The way of Jesus being taught in this piece of Scripture is the perspective that generosity (the opposite of greed) is one of the ways we can experience the subtle Kingdom gift.

In today’s story, Jesus tells us to “Watch out! Be careful how you think about other people, be careful how you treat other people! Do not be greedy but live generously!” OK, I put a few words in Jesus’ mouth, but that is what he is saying. Lack of greed and generosity go far beyond money. They affect our every thought and action.

For instance, are we greedily hoping we get a relationship with Jesus in heaven while all those other people burn? What a horrific theology! We have a choice in understanding how God is, how God loves, how God forgives. What is the reason behind choosing to imagine an angry God? What is the reason for not building kingdom relationships with our enemies today? Are we writing off those relationships hoping God will take care of those people? I believe the answers to these questions are generated from the health-state of our souls. This is the case for the brother who comes to Jesus as our story opens. Jesus can’t fix the broken relationships that caused the family schism. Jesus won’t give the man what he asks for because the man has before him the difficult self-work of reconciliation. Now, the man can walk away angry, cursing the unfairness…and probably did.

There is an alternative. Generosity in everything. Generosity as a way of life is what Jesus is asking of us. “Guard yourself of ALL kinds of greed,” he says. The rich man in the parable had a choice. The LAND produced abundantly. He had little role in the situation. He could have realized the incredible gift he had received and shared it with everyone in his community. He chose greed. Imagine the joy he missed! Imagine how much fun it would have been to give huge grain bonuses! What a shame to have missed that joy. What joy is the brother missing by not striving for reconciliation? What emotional freedom is being missed by not, at the minimum, even if reconciliation is impossible, generously forgiving his greedy brother?

What are the resources God might be inviting us to share? What gifts and talents have we been given that could bring tremendous joy if we shared them? Perhaps it could be something intangible like forgiveness. If you have experienced that gift, how might you share it? With a little thought effort, the gifts we have to share will become a rather long list. Perhaps what is holding us back from sharing is judging whether other not people deserve to receive the gifts. If that is the case, then for God’s sake, what joys are we missing?

The New York governor is in exile, plotting revenge. But he has lost a staggering amount of power.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Kathy Hochul has spent her first week as New York’s governor reminding everyone as often as possible that she is not her predecessor. She has introduced new sexual harassment training guidelines, a move The New York Times described as a “subtle jab” at Andrew Cuomo, who resigned in disgrace after a damning investigation into sexual harassment allegations was released earlier this month. In what may as well be another subtle jab, she has pitched herself as a model of transparency, quickly releasing new Covid-19 death numbers that grew the state’s total by 12,000. She shared a photo with the former governor’s old sparring partner and nemesis Bill de Blasio, featuring the two of them laughing over breakfast. And she has channeled Mariah Carey, dissociating with Cuomo at nearly every level. “It’s no secret that the governor and I were not close,” Hochul said last week. “He had his own tight inner circle. I created my own space.”

Cuomo, meanwhile, has been like unto Napoleon on Elba, although he has been exiled to a friend’s home in the Hamptons instead of a Mediterranean island. An inveterate schemer, he is said to be plotting both revenge and his political comeback. Late last week, Politico reported that he was already hard at work preparing an effort to sabotage Hochul and New York Attorney General Letitia James, whom he blames for his downfall.

“The fever [with] which they are doing this—to relitigate the past and undermine Hochul—is incredible,” one reporter told Politico. “They don’t seem to see that they are out of power and no one cares.” Cuomo, moreover, has amassed a substantial war chest, with nearly $20 million in campaign funds. He had hoped to use this boodle to save his skin when his political career was on the line; now, no Democrat wants to be caught dead with their fingers on the lucre. ​​“What is a man to do with $18 million, a lot of enemies and a desire for revenge?” political consultant Hank Sheinkopf told Politico. “This is not a guy who forgets. The only question is when he tries to get even, and whether it’s upfront or behind the scenes.”

But Cuomo is in a bind. It’s unlikely that money will be spent on candidates who will primary those enemies that Cuomo blames for his downfall, particularly those serving the state Senate. He may very well be saving it for another run for office in less than a year’s time, when New York holds its gubernatorial primary. But while he was able to hold onto more Democratic support than one might hope, given the allegations against him, very few New Yorkers wanted him to run for a fourth term.

New York’s Democratic Party is a mess, thanks in part to Cuomo’s machinations over the last decade, and there is no obvious statehouse successor. Hochul will almost certainly run again; she may be able to generate enough goodwill simply by not being Andrew Cuomo, but she is relatively unknown in the state and, as the first governor from western New York in a century, lacks downstate connections. James was perhaps the best positioned to succeed Cuomo as governor, but she is also the person most likely to kindle his wrath should she run next year. There are a number of state senators who might also plausibly throw their hat in the ring. These will face the same daunting challenge nearly every New York Democrat has at the moment: Andrew Cuomo dominated New York politics—and kneecapped potential rivals at every turn—for such a long period of time that just obtaining the kind of profile necessary to run a credible campaign in a race that will touch off in a matter of months is a hard slog. Having Cuomo in Count of Monte Cristo mode, seething and vengeful and scheming against those who he believes snatched his birthright from him, only makes it worse.

Cuomo has long been portrayed as a master of the political dark arts, adept at creating conditions in which he was the conduit through which everything flowed; similarly, he was able by methods both overt and covert to muzzle potential rivals and, for most of his reign, neuter the state’s progressives. As Politico noted, Cuomo “was notorious among the Albany press corps for using the media as a tool to inspire fear and sow mayhem. He’d speak to reporters on background as a ‘senior administration official,’ and use that anonymity to defend himself. He’d plant unsavory stories about political opponents. He’d get his aides to carry out his dirty work.”

It’s not hard to imagine Cuomo reverting to form now that he’s been knocked out of office. Surely he will make the attempt. He has many enemies: Hochul, James, nearly the entire state Senate delegation. Blistering attacks have always been instinctive—not strategic—for the former governor. Chaos is his best shot at a comeback: New York may not like Cuomo, but it needs him to keep the socialists in New York City and the bureaucrats in Albany in check. Even if he fails to return to power, he may have the satisfaction of taking down those he blames for his downfall. It may be a cynical plan, but it could succeed.

Nevertheless, the flaw in this scheme’s design is that he no longer holds the office with which he constructed so much of his aura of invincibility. And while Cuomo was adroit at convincing others that he was a master manipulator and expert lever-puller, the actual record is quite mixed. He was able to use the press as a bludgeon to bully and intimidate rivals; this option won’t be as available to him now that he’s been banished. State resources, which he used to great effect to cultivate his image, bash rivals, and broadly make the case for his own competence, will similarly be unavailable to him. At the moment, he’s just a guy—albeit one with millions of dollars sitting in a bank account waiting to be spent on petty schemes.

Still, as Alex Pareene wrote last week, “What could once have been painted as skilled political knife-fighting, or whatever strange term the Times used to use to euphemize his paranoid belligerence, might now just be pure lashing out from a guy who doesn’t know what to do when he’s beat.”

The image of a sinister Cuomo plotting in the Hamptons with a loyal aide or two is a compelling tale, one that’s certainly not beyond the imaginings of the outcast governor. But it’s also a story that’s based on the old image of Cuomo, one we’ve outgrown. Nobody’s talking about an outer-borough Machiavelli anymore. We’re talking about a pathetic bum who can’t admit that he has brought about his own downfall.

Want to slap your boss? Trick a drug-sniffing dog? Explain away your STD? Here’s how. (Not that we’re recommending any of these.)

The Lifehacker staff are all upstanding members of society with clean driving records and shiny white teeth; we’re not like those reprobates over at Reddit’s Unethical Life Hacks forum. I trolled their dark-side tips to bring you 20 of the most morally questionable, legally dubious, often hilarious ( but sometimes useful) hacks Reddit had to offer.

(Please do not actually do any of these terrible things.)

Use a memory foam pillow as a fart bomb

Use a memory foam pillow as a fart bomb

I don’t own one of these pillows, so I can’t check whether this stealth cropdusting trick would work, but I don’t see why it wouldn’t.

Note: According to Lifehacker’s deputy editor, Joel Cunningham : Fart particles should be referred to as “farticles.”

Verdict: Hilarious

How to slap your boss in the head

How to slap your boss in the head

Sadly, our work-from-home world makes this one impossible to try out for many of us, and assault is illegal, so you shouldn’t actually do this. Unless your boss is a total jerk.

Verdict: Hilarious

Get cheaper services just by asking for them

Get cheaper services just by asking for them

This tip is from two years ago, so I have no ideas if the specific pricing for Audible is still in effect, but it highlights a larger point: Often companies will offer you cheaper prices if you ask correctly. Try telling your cable company or phone service you’re thinking of switching, and see what they can do for you.

It’s not even unethical, really. Not as unethical as hiding what a service costs in the hope that you won’t ask for the lower rate, anyway.

Verdict: Useful

Can you fool drug dogs through creative baking?

Can you fool drug dogs through creative baking?

I have no idea whether this trick would actually work. I lean toward “no,” because them police dogs is smart. Anyway, who would want to be the first one to try it? Still, there’s something appealing about the creative challenge of baking edibles that could pass as dog treats instead of, say, wrapping your weed in a steak to get the same effect.

Verdict: Undetermined

Get revenge on your enemies from beyond the grave

Get revenge on your enemies from beyond the grave

This “unethical death tip” seems unlikely to actually work, and you’d never know if it did, but it’s at least possible. And maybe thinking, “t hey may have the upper hand now, but I’ll get back at them someday” would be worth carrying a note in your wallet?

Verdict: Hilarious

Use your AirPods as a spy tool

Use your AirPods as a spy tool

If you’re a handsome super-agent with a license to kill, and SPECTRE is plotting to create an underwater civilization by capturing nuclear submarines and triggering World War III, just go to the secret underwater lair in Atlantis, leave your iPhone on the table, and turn on Live Listen while Stromberg tells Jaws his evil scheme. Before long, you should be able to thwart the plan, throw Jaws in a shark tank, and make out with a beautiful woman. The Live Listen range is about 50 feet.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Passive-aggressive behavior is the demonstration of negative feelings, resentment, and aggression in a discreet or “passive” manner. It’s characterized by subtle comments or actions that indicate a person disagrees or is displeased with a course of action.

Unfortunately, we’re faced with passive-aggressive behavior in all walks of life. You’ll get it at work from that colleague, the one who always has something to complain about. You encounter it when you’re running errands, from disgruntled service industry employees. And you might even face it at home, coming from your partner or child–especially if they’re having a bad day.

So, what does passive-aggressiveness look like in real life? And how can you fight this toxic behavior?

In my book, EQ Applied: The Real-World Guide to Emotional Intelligence, I take a long, hard look at how people use emotions to try and manipulate you–including the use of passive-aggression.

Here are a few ways passive-aggressive behavior may manifest itself in the real world:

1. The giver of silent treatment.

After agreeing to do things a certain way, the other person avoids you as much as possible. When you try to have a conversation, they remain tight-lipped, provide short answers and refuse to engage, or turn a cold shoulder.

2. The sulker.

We’ve all seen this behavior in kids, but plenty of adults do it too. When the person doesn’t get their way, they suddenly become sad and bitter, immediately sucking the joy out of any room they enter.

3. The forgetter.

In this case, a person agrees to help with a task but then simply doesn’t follow through. They may claim they “forgot” when in reality they had no intention of helping out in the first place. Or, they simply procrastinate to the point that you (or someone else) has to take over.

4. The low performer.

Instead of completely failing to follow through on a task, this person carries it out but does so sloppily or with little effort. On the outside they feign support, but by performing way below expectations they let their true feelings shine through.

5. The needler.

This person uses sarcasm or backhanded compliments to try and undermine your sense of self-confidence or eat away at your nerves. They try to be ambiguous, but they know exactly what they’re doing.

How to fight back

In most of these cases, the person will deny anything is wrong. They may claim ignorance or simply refuse to acknowledge genuine feelings of anger or negativity.

In other cases, a person who regularly employs passive-aggressive behavior doesn’t even realize they’re doing so. But that doesn’t make their words or actions any easier to bear.

So, how can you combat passive-aggression once and for all?

Since the person refuses to confront their negative feelings, you have to help them do so.

“It’s not an in-your-face, anger-inspiring, make-them-admit-what-they-did kind of authoritarian tactic,” writes Signe Whitson, co-author of The Angry Smile. Rather, it’s “a quiet and reflective verbal intervention skill in which a person gently but openly shares his or her thoughts about the other person’s behavior and unexpressed anger.”

In other words, you want to work with the person to get to the root problem.

To do this, be sure to clearly communicate your own feelings and expectations. If you suspect that you know the specific cause of the other person’s aggression, ask specifically if that’s what’s bothering them. If they deny that’s the case, take their word for it–but gently try to keep the discussion going. If appropriate, take initiative to apologize for anything you’ve done that could contribute to hurt feelings and ask what you could do to make the situation better.

Most of the time, your genuine interest in the other person will cause them to begin changing their behavior. And once a problem is identified, you can often work together to find an agreement that satisfies both parties moving forward.

Follow these steps, and you’ll stop passive-aggression dead in its tracks–and make emotions work for you, instead of against you.

We live in a day and age filled with division. So many refuse to forgive or relate to those with whom they disagree. Instead of love and restoration, our world is defined by accusations, polarization, canceling and hatred.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

The dilemma of real enemies continues to plague us. How should we treat those who come against us? What should we do in these touchy situations? The command of Jesus is far different than the call of the world.

Luke 6:27 “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies” (ESV).

What does love look like? Jesus starts his command with the verb “love.” How is love seen and shown? Prioritizing the needs of others above our own. Quality time. Encouraging words. Affirming touch. Selfless service. Thoughtful gifts. Love is not merely an emotion or a thought; it is an intentional choice and action from the heart and mind.

What does hate look like? The world feeds hatred and encourages bitterness. How is that seen and built? Disappointment. Annoyance. Disagreement. Dislike. Resentment. Indignation. Plotting. Revenge. We must recognize our enemies’ strategies and avoid imitating their tactics.

Who are your enemies? Enemies are real and numerous in Satan, his demons, our world and in our fallen and sinful flesh. Enemies can be recognized in their emotional and mental acts of hatred that are directed towards us. Sometimes their hatred can be easily seen in their facial expressions and body language, but hate can also be hidden or subtle. Other times the hate of our enemies’ words can be harsh and their actions can be avoidance, aggression or abuse.

Luke 6:35-36 “But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful.”

How are we to show love to our enemies? Do good to them. Bless them. Pray sincerely for their salvation, correction, and change. Be patient towards them. Give generously to them. Treat them the way you want to be treated. These actions are easier said than done, but we can do better. Jesus calls us to love those who are hardest to love. That doesn’t mean we should be a doormat for sexual or physical abuse (call law enforcement) or to be an enabler of evil. Let’s love our enemies the way God has sacrificially loved us through Jesus.

Luke 6:31 “And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.”

How are you treating others? How can you do better? In the “golden rule,” Jesus shows us how to love: treat others, in thought, feelings, words and actions, the way we would want to be treated. We must know and remember that Jesus has been kind to us, even when we acted as enemies toward Him. Our patience and mercy is a reflection and overflow of the patience and mercy that He has shown us.

2 Thessalonians 3:13-15 “As for you, brothers, do not grow weary in doing good. If anyone does not obey what we say in this letter, take note of that person, and have nothing to do with him, that he may be ashamed. Do not regard him as an enemy, but warn him as a brother.”

Have you forgiven your enemies? Forgiveness is not easy, but it is key to how we love our enemies. Our forgiveness may not always be received and it does not mean there will be a complete relief of the natural or relational consequences of sin. But entrusting our enemies to God’s justice, and being willing to grant forgiveness, will greatly benefit your mind, soul, and health. Let’s love and forgive just as God has loved and forgiven us in Christ.

Matthew 6:14-15 “For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”

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How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

How to get subtle revenge on your enemiesIn 1882, years after an Apache encampment was massacred by Mexican troops, the tribe’s legendary leader Geronimo and his men came to avenge the killings on a grassy hill just north of the town of Galeana in Mexico. Library of Congress Prints and Photohgraphs Division

In Mexico’s state of Chihuahua, some 115 miles from the U.S. border, there is a seemingly unremarkable grassy hill just north of the town of Galeana. Look closely, though, and you might see century-old bullet casings rusting in the grass, and a slight depression at the top where a historic act of revenge is carved into the ground.

In 1882, years after an Apache encampment was massacred by Mexican troops, this is where the tribe’s legendary leader Geronimo and his men came to avenge the killings, burning Mexican commander Juan Mata Ortiz alive in a pit at the top of the hill. “They told the Mexican commander, Juan Mata Ortiz, ‘no bala, no cuchillo, no lance, pero lumre,” says Nelda Whetten, a lifelong resident of Chihuahua. “As in, you’re not going to have a quick death—no bullet, no arrow, no lance, but fire.”

Geronimo’s quest for revenge began decades earlier, sometime during 1858, when an unprovoked attack launched the 29-year-old Apache (then known as Goyaałé) into a lifetime of war. While he and others were gathering supplies in Janos—a town just down the road from what would become the Mormon colony of Colonia Dublán—a company of 400 Mexican soldiers attacked their unguarded encampment. Recounting the raid in his 1905 autobiography, Geronimo wrote, “When all were counted, I found that my aged mother, my young wife, and my three small children were among the slain.” More than 100 Apache women and children were killed, but only Geronimo’s family was destroyed so thoroughly.

Geronimo assumed a leadership role among the Apaches, seeking vengeance for the raid. “We will attack them in their homes. I will fight in the front of the battle,” he wrote. “If I am killed no one need mourn for me.” Geronimo’s revenge campaign would last longer than he or anyone else would have expected, as he and other Apaches spent the next several decades intermittently raiding Mexican towns and military encampments, seeking to exact vengeance on their enemy several times over.

The ambush that occurred on the grassy hill at Chocolate Pass, just north of Galeana, was one of the most infamous of his acts of revenge. On November 13, 1882, a band of Apaches under the leadership of Geronimo and Chief Juh ambushed Mexican forces. Their target: Juan Mata Ortiz, the commander of the town’s Mexican garrison. He was particularly hated for his role in the Battle of Tres Castillos two years earlier, in which more than half of the Apaches were killed and the majority of the survivors taken prisoner.

“The Apaches went into the town of Galeana, because they knew Ortiz was garrisoned with about 20 troopers, and they stole some horses, knowing that he would chase them,” says John Hatch, a local resident who occasionally brings tour groups to the site. “They set up this ambush for him, on the road between Galeana and Casas Grandes.”

When Mata Ortiz and his troops realized they’d been trapped, they took to the closest high ground, hoping to dig in until reinforcements arrived. The Apaches, though, surrounded the Mexican forces and slowly picked them off from a distance with their rifles. Of the 23 Mexican soldiers, only two survived the onslaught: an infantryman who was allowed to escape, and Juan Mata Ortiz. “The instructions to all the Apaches were to not kill el capitan,” Hatch says. “So all the others were picked off one by one, but they threw him in the pit and burned him alive.” Over a century later, the hill still bears his name—Cerrito Mata Ortiz.

Today, says Hatch, Geronimo-obsessed tour groups from as far as Germany come to see the site. “When you climb up on the hill, you can find piles of rock that the Mexicans had stacked up to defend themselves,” he says. “Occasionally, people still pick up some old shell casings from the battle.” If you look closely at the top of the hill, you can see a subtle depression in the terrain—the pit where the Apaches exacted revenge their on Mata Ortiz, nearly 130 years ago.

Over at the town of Galeana’s provincial government building, an exhibition of artifacts, including photographs and metal spurs, tells the story of the ambush. The town’s Plaza Juan Mata Ortiz, with a stone memorial, honors the commander.

“After the ambush, when the Apaches came to Galeana, all the people ran to the old church,” Whetten says. “They said that, from up in the bell tower, they could see smoke coming from a fire on that little hill.”

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Joseph Stromberg was previously a digital reporter for Smithsonian.

Glitter? Pffft. It’s the stuff of kindergarten, not revenge. It’s too light, sparkly and cute to make your enemies pay, particularly if they’re jackass neighbors. You know the kind: Inconsiderate punks all about that bass at all hours of the night, loudly banging more than their heads like they just don’t care.

/>Bad Neighbour Notes | Kickstarter

No, for the overachieving jerks next door, you gotta to stick it to them with something meaner, something that stinks of shame, something realllly special: sticky notes. And not the wimpy kind your boss litters your proposals with. Big, bad, perfectly passive-aggressive sticky notes the size of a full sheet of paper. The kind expressly printed to publicly shame lame neighbors for rude, lewd or just plain annoying behaviors.

They’re called Bad Neighbour Notes and you can stick ‘em where the sun shines — right on your neighbors’ front doors for all to see. Then sneak away, quick like a bunny, before anyone sees you.

They’re your best, non-incriminating bet for keeping naughty neighbors in check, so says Sean Mayers, the evil genius behind the latest wacky entrant into the budding anonymous, nonviolent revenge market. (Yes, it’s a thing, not a load of cow crud.) The best part? You get to make Johnny Rotten Neighbor feel bad and he’ll never know it’s you. Hopefully.

Mayers, a Toronto-based realtor and amateur stand-up comedian, thinks his customizable marks of shame will “strike a chord” with people who, you know, just can’t deal with mature, face-to-face adult confrontation, a.k.a cowards. Not the mean ones, though.

“An anonymous note with a sarcastic message is the least mean way to vent your frustration with a neighbor,” Mayers told Entrepreneur, “without ending up in jail for assault.”

The 45-year-old launched his convenient, prefab modern day Scarlet Letters today on Kickstarter, with a random funding goal of $2,891. At the time this was written, 12 people, probably conflict-averse milksops, had backed the 28-day campaign.

The lovingly illustrated nastygrams call out a laundry list of common kvetches people have with their neighbors, with obvious categories like “barking dog,” “loud music,” “people arguing,” “weird food smells” and, the vilest shame cave in the bunch, “loud sex.” Each brightly-colored, adhesive 4”x6” demerit is stamped with a bold, scornful headline to “let them know you mean business.”

Pick the one that fits the crime, circle the time and the day of the week your neighbor screwed with your zen, oh-so-gently slap it on their door and feel the passive aggression satisfyingly flood your yellow veins. Phew. “No more need for hand written [sic], anger-filled notes in illegible handwriting. Let’s see a police hand-writing [sic] expert prove it was you now ;)”

Bad Neighbour Notes aren’t quite the hilarious reads that these pissed-off neighbor love notes are. Still, they’re just harsh enough to cost your neighbors their dignity, but, mild guilt aside, they won’t cost you much. Various package deals are available for $9, $15 and $25, including — oh, boy! — a NSFW bonus edition. More like NSIYLYJ — Not Safe If You Like Your Job.

Mayers, a self-professed lifelong inventor-entrepreneur, says the inspiration for the neighbor-shaming notes are, you guessed it, his own super crappy neighbors. A “yappy little dog” barks non-stop while he works from his apartment all day, he says, and his upstairs neighbor constantly stomps on the floor, blasting music, howling along out of tune. Good times.

Oh, and Mayers claims his wares are much more menacing than mere glitter. “ShipYourEnemiesGlitter is all about one-time revenge,” he says. “Bad Neighbour Notes is all about the ability to avenge yourself over and over again for all of the annoying things your neighbour does to you.” Just don’t get caught sticky-handed.

What’s Mayers’ explanation for the funky spelling of “neighbour”? “I’m Canadian, eh.” Ah, now it all makes sense.

To behold the new naughty neighbor notes in all of their backhanded beauty, check out the clip below:

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How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

For many, forgiveness is hard. It takes strength to let go of anger, release resentment, and truly forgive someone who has wronged us. Yet, it’s something we’re often called to do, not for others, but for ourselves.

You see, when you harbor negative feelings, it doesn’t hurt the other person—It hurts you. It impacts your health, relationships and taints your overall lens on life.

Below are twelve of our best quotes to help you relinquish anger and start on the path to forgiveness.

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 1: You cannot see your reflection in boiling water. Similarly, you cannot see truth in a state of anger. – Unknown

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 2: Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. – Buddha

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 3: Forgive people in your life, even those who are not sorry for their actions. Holding on to anger hurts you, not them. – Unknown

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 4: Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves. – Confucius

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 5: Holding a grudge doesn’t make you strong; it makes you bitter. Forgiving doesn’t make you weak; it sets you free. – Realistic Buddhism

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 6: To forgive is not to excuse what the other person did. It’s to prevent their behavior from destroying your heart. – Unknown

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 7: Forgiveness is not about letting someone off the hook for their actions but freeing ourselves of negative energies that bind us to them. – Satsuki Shibuya

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 8: Everyone makes mistakes in life, but that doesn’t mean they have to pay for them the rest of their life. Sometimes good people make bad choices. It doesn’t mean they’re bad. It means they are human. – Unknown

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 9: Forgiveness is the best form of love. It takes a strong person to say sorry and an even stronger person to forgive. – Unknown

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 10: Forgiveness is a strange thing. It can be easier to forgive our enemies than our friends. It can be hardest of all to forgive the people we love. Like all of life’s important coping skills, the ability to forgive and capacity to let go of resentments most likely take root very early in our lives. – Fred Rogers

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 11: Sincere forgiveness is not colored with expectations that the other person apologizes or changes. Don’t worry whether or not they finally understand you. Love them and release them. Life feeds back truth to people in its own way and time. – Sara Paddison

How to get subtle revenge on your enemies

Quote 12: To understand everything is to forgive everything. – Buddha

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Table of Contents


Swordsman/Soldier [ edit ]

This basic grunt comes in various colours: red, blue, grey, green, Dark. Note that Swordsmen are sometimes armed with a spear or bow.

Clubman [ edit ]

Another grunt. Sometimes uses throwing axes as ranged attack.

Evil Trees [ edit ]

These trees are quite nasty. Watch out for their lethal toadstool ammunition (which seems to have very limited ammo). They have a great aversion to being burnt or drop-kicked. When dead, they shriek and usually burst into little scraps of firewood.

Strategies: in Scene 2A: Cave, you can chop at the stalagmites littered around the subterranean arena. If one of these flying stone daggers hits an Evil Tree, it is an instant kill. In Scene 2B: Forest, twigs will fall down around you and make a crunching sound, or ones already on the ground will levitate. Don’t try to bash them before they are fully grown or your blows will fall harmlessly and they will get a chance to stab you. Failing this, a quick drop-kick, cannonball, etc. will shatter them. If you time it correctly while they are growing, you can get a free hit, and sometimes even turn them into matchsticks instantly.

Natives [ edit ]

These big guys wield either knobby bone clubs or big wooden clubs. For projectiles, they can carry flaming boulders, or spears to throw at you. The men with boulders will throw them instantly, rather than when they are likely to hit you. They can also inadvertently hit an ally.

Strategies: On the ship, there is a massive area with Natives dancing (for no good reason) and initially ignoring you. This is the time to strike, death-jabbing and drop-kicking all who stand in your way.

Skeletons [ edit ]

These would be your top enemy. Most notably they keep rebuilding themselves over and over until they are finally killed, so you have to watch for the death cry and subtle darkening of the bones. They can also withstand a single drop-kick.

Even more so than other enemies, they pride themselves with lightning-fast reflexes (their attacks usually halve your health!) and, if it can be believed, are even more death-jab-happy than in the original game! They also have boomerangs which have 2 chances of hitting you if you are in their way.

Strategies: Note that they have a stunned period just like most other enemies. When they are a pile of bones, they are invulnerable to death-jabs or other ground-attacks (but still vulnerable to magic).