How to look hot for your boyfriend

How to look hot for your boyfriend

It’s a sad truth that the thrill of primping for date night tends to wear off when you’re in a serious relationship. But, if you want to bring back that early excitement when you first started dating and couldn’t keep your hands off each other, it’s important to pull out all the beauty stops once in awhile. And what better excuse than Valentine’s Day to do it up? Here, tricks that’ll totally turn on the man who’s seen you naked a zillion times.

1. Look and taste sweet.

Instead of using a regular shimmer powder or body lotion to make your shoulders and chest gleam, try a flavored formula. That way, he’ll get a sweet surprise when he goes in for a kiss. Two good ones: Urban Decay Honey Body Powder, $26, and Booty Parlor Dust Up Kissable Body Shimmer, $28.

2. Try something new down there.

If you’ve been sporting a Brazilian-style landing strip since you and your man first met, grow it out to a fuller triangle shape or go totally bare. Not only will you give him a sexy surprise, but it’ll also create new sensations in bed. For those of you who don’t want to mess with your bikini line, you can accessorize it with a stick-on crystal body tattoo.

3. Use a flavored lip gloss.

Most guys look at lipstick as a barrier to your lips. But that doesn’t mean you have to leave your mouth naked if you want to ignite a make-out session. Apply a sheer lip gloss with a subtle vanilla flavor. It’ll give him a pleasant hint of sweetness when he kisses you. We’ve experienced our fair share of success with Lancôme Juicy Tubes in French Vanilla, $18.

4. Apply self-tanner everywhere but.

Bronzed skin is definitely sexy, but if you really want to up the ante, self-tan all over while wearing a small bikini bottom (or a thong if you’re super-daring). The “tan lines” will remind him of your last beach getaway and inspire you to reenact the amazing vacation sex you had there.

5. Choose a scent just for “sexy time.”

Over time your perfume loses its ability to get your guy all hot and bothered. That’s why you should find a new fragrance that you wear only when you want to seduce him, since the area of the brain that processes scent also rules emotion and memory. That way, when he smells it, he’ll automatically get turned on. Something feminine and subtle, like Antonio Banderas Blue Seduction for Women, $30, will get you both in the mood.

6. Stick on fake lashes.

Your man probably won’t pick up on the fact that your lashes are significantly thicker and longer, but what he will notice is how much bigger your eyes appear, which is a good thing since almost every guy finds that attractive.

7. Paint your nails red.

We all know that red is the color of passion, so it should come as no surprise that a scarlet manicure or pedicure will send him a sexy signal. Overwhelmed by the range of red polishes out there? You can’t go wrong with OPI’s best-selling “I’m Not Really a Waitress.”

Want to know what men find sexy? Here’s a hint—high heels and miniskirts aren’t the only things that drive them wild. We asked real guys to share their most memorable seduction scenes, and found out a little creativity goes a long way. Add your personal touch to a night together, and you’ll have him begging for more. Whether you’re in a relationship or not, take a cue from these 20 honest answers about what guys really love!

1. Set the scene: “My girlfriend took me to an isolated beach for fresh grilled mussels and clams. There wasn’t anyone else there, and we started to kiss. It was so quiet that every little sound seemed to carry and echo. Train in the distance, an old wooden trestle, our blanket . her bringing me out there made me truly want to be with her.”—captiveshark, 38

2. Plan a party: “I loved when my girlfriend planned a surprise party for me on my 30th birthday. All the work she put into it showed how much she cared about me, and I found that to be incredibly sexy.”—Michael, 32, entertainment agent

3. Surprise him at the door: “One day, upon returning from work, my girlfriend greeted me in black lingerie and a sexy haircut. It was so sexy because she proved to me that she wanted to make my fantasies come true.”—Norm, 36, sales associate

4. Show off your silly side: “If a woman loves The Simpsons, I love her. It means she has a good sense of humor and likes silly stuff. That plus confidence, and I am very attracted!”—Dave, 33, snowboarding instructor

5. Make the first move: “My wife and I were looking at pictures during one of our first dates. While we were sitting on the bed she put her arm around me. It was so genuine and warm a gesture. That’s when I knew we really had a good thing going. I wanted to be with her sexually, and not just for a one-night stand!”—Sam, company president, 45

6. Don’t try to be sexy: “When my girlfriend wears a large T-shirt with no pants or something else casual around the apartment, it’s very sexy. The sexiest things she does, she does without realizing it.”—Josh, 26, business school student

7. Take a bath for two: “The sexiest thing my wife ever did was ask me to take a bubble bath. It was out of the ordinary, sensual and very relaxing.”—Joe, 34, publicist

8. Plan your next date: “One day my girlfriend (who is now my wife) came over to my place for our date and brought me flowers. Then, she took me to a nice restaurant. After dinner, she took me to a jazz bar and bought me a few drinks. Then, she took me home and . that was a great night! It was very seductive to have a woman spend so much time planning an evening with me. She showed me that she knew what I liked, was willing to go out on a limb and was into the relationship for more than just what I could give.”—Todd, 27, social worker

9. Do a (private) striptease: “My girlfriend performed a strip show just for me, but wouldn’t let me touch her at all. I had to obey the ‘club rules.’ It drove me crazy. Good thing there weren’t any bouncers!”—Matt, 27, music agent

10. Become his favorite sexy star: “I like James Bond movies. For Valentine’s Day one year, a girlfriend gave me a series of cards and gifts that followed a James Bondian storyline. I got a martini recipe book with the glasses and ingredients all accompanied by very sexy notes. As I made a couple martinis —shaken, not stirred, of course—she slipped into the bedroom to prepare my final gift: a candlelit Bond girl wearing brand new lingerie!”—Ky, 26, editor

11. Wear your heart on your sleeve: “I was sitting next to a girl I had just started dating, and unconsciously touched her forearm. She got goose bumps, and when I noticed, she smiled, a bit embarrassed. This was the most sincere compliment I could ever imagine getting and made me extremely glad to be with her. A woman with a caring attitude is sexy.”—Jim, 33

12. Hold him tight: “Sometimes, a hug can be the sexiest thing. When our bodies are so close, every level of communication from our heads down to our toes is engaged. If it clicks, well, that does it for me.”—Patrick, 26, producer

13. Just smilereally! “The first time my girlfriend smiled at me from across a crowded room, I knew that I wanted to be with her. Showing that she liked me totally fired up my desire.”—Norm, age 36, sales associate

14. Write a sexy love note: “When we were dating, my girlfriend wrote a note that said: ‘Thank you for introducing me to the joy of having my toes sucked.’ Reading it triggered my memory of the electricity in her body when we were together.”—Patrick, 26, Web producer

15. Show off your talents: “I remember having dinner with a group at this outdoor restaurant on Sunset, in Los Angeles. My girlfriend was talking about her upcoming audition for acting school, but then she totally surprised me. She stood up and did her monologue, and the best part was, it was really funny! I was so impressed that she would get up and perform. It totally turned me on that she didn’t care about a lot of people watching.”—Dave, 33, snowboarding instructor

16. Try something new: “My girlfriend was staying at one of the fanciest hotels in Chicago (where we both lived). She was there doing business, but snuck me in to spend the night. We had a big fancy bed and access to room service. It was so exciting. Suddenly she looked me right in the eye and told me exactly what she wanted me to do to her, explicitly. This wasn’t in keeping with her personality, so it showed me that she had a sexual side she was comfortable sharing with me, and that she wanted me. The change of pace that night was exciting and magical.—Ben, 25, journalist

17. Be suggestive: “I was out with my girlfriend for an anniversary dinner at a very nice restaurant. She was wearing a skirt and black stockings. During the middle of our meal she leaned over and mentioned that she forgot something at home—her underwear! I looked down, and she had pulled her skirt up just enough for me to see that she was telling the truth. I was lucky not to crash the car on our way home!”—David, 25, attorney

18. Put aside your inhibitions: “While we were out together, my wife let me know she was wearing very seductive lingerie. Later, the outfit itself was so sexy to see. But what seduced me was the fact that I know she doesn’t have a great body image. She wore something that she didn’t think she looked good in because I would love it. And of course, she looked great!”—nos482, 31, attorney

19. Indulge his quirks: “I’m a huge ketchup freak. So one day the woman I was dating put together this package for me, and instead of surrounding all my goodies in some fancy paper, she filled the bag with ketchup packets. She showed she was paying attention to my little weird quirks and such, and I thought that was the cutest thing ever!”—Josh, 26, portfolio manager

20. Help with the tough tasks: “The morning after I threw a wild party, my wife (then girlfriend) helped us clean up the huge mess, even though some of it had actually made me gag! I knew then that she would stick by me—and that I felt the same way. That was also the morning that I first said ‘I love you’ to her.”—nos482, 31, attorney

A version of this story originally appeared on iVillage.

By Sharonblog (self media writer) | 1 month ago

From all we see in movies and magazines, most girls think they have a firm idea of what it means to be hot. Pouting your lips or wearing a sexy dress can factor into the equation, but they’re only part of a bigger picture. If you have a boyfriend and want to dazzle him with your sex appeal, you should think about the way you feel and act as much as the way you look. Even if your boyfriend already adores you, you’ll still likely blow his socks off if you go that extra mile.

Maintain good hygiene. If you want to look your best, it should be a no-brained that you will want to keep up with the absolute basics. Brushing your teeth at least twice a day, bathing or showering regularly, trimming toe and fingernails, and brushing your hair are just some of the things you should be keeping an eye on regularly. Even without any type of cosmetics, you can look very beautiful so long as you look healthy and well-maintained.

Moisturize your skin. Moisturizing your skin is an important part of keeping it looking vibrant and youthful throughout the years. Although wrinkles on their own aren’t necessarily a bad thing, signs of aging may have an impact on your confidence. It may be a good idea to buy a specific moisturizer for your eyes as well. Eye moisturizers use a more delicate material to adjust for the gentle skin around eyes.

Get regular exercise. Regular exercise tightens up your skin and is an essential part of keeping your body in healthy order. Cardio exercise like running will help put you in a great mood throughout the rest of the day. Don’t be afraid of working some muscle training into your workouts as well. Some women feel against it because they think it’s too masculine.

Make your hands and feet glamorous. Manicures and pedicures are a great trick to take you from glamorous to casual. They feel great, and your boyfriend will notice the difference in the way you look and feel. It’s a good idea to make the hands and feet match if you use nail polish. After all, you want to make yourself a consistent, impressive visual package. You can moisturize and manicure your hands at home if your budget’s a concern. It can take some time to perfect your skills, but saves lots of money in the long run.

Wear red or black. A sexy black or fire-engine red are colours that have sex appeal virtually built into them when worn by a woman who knows what she wants. The kind of wardrobe you’re wearing shouldn’t be completely different from what you’re comfortable with, but aiming for suggestive colours can say something on its own.

Slip into form-fitting or revealing clothes. A great deal of sex appeal has to do with what someone is wearing. What you wear in particular will have a lot to do with your personal sense of style. As a general rule however, you should try to find clothing that showcases the natural shape of your body. It’s not the clothes your boyfriend’s interested in; it’s what’s underneath that counts. You don’t need to dress so provocatively to get a reaction out of someone. Something casual can usually do the trick. It’s how you wear it that counts.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

There are many advantages to having a boyfriend. Besides having them pay for dinner here and there and being a great support system, they also come in handy when it comes to their wardrobe.

After spending the night at their apartment, sometimes you forget you have an early morning class. Instead of doing the ‘walk of shame’ for everyone to see, you can search your BF’s closet and come up with the perfect outfit.

Once their wardrobe is in your possession, it’s going to be hard to return. Grand Central has compiled a list of different ways to transform your boyfriend’s wardrobe into feminine, oh-so-chic looks. Don’t be surprised when you trade in your tight skinny jeans for a pair of your man’s Levi’s.

The Beanie
It’s easy to have a bad hair day while being at you’re at your boyfriend’s apartment without your fancy hair products. Instead of rushing home, reach for his beanie to wear and hide the frizziness. Wear that Detroit Lions one, and you might even get some approving nods from the sports fanatics in your class.

The Button-up Shirt
You can go from laying in bed to out the door in minutes for class by wearing a button up. Throw on your favorite pair of yoga pants and your look is complete.

The White-Tee
This is a staple for guys – now you can make it yours. Make his white t-shirt look grungy by wearing a leather jacket with some gold accessories.

The Flannel
Make a boring outfit a little more 90’s-chic by tying your boyfriend’s worn out plaid shirt around your waist. This style is trendy and casual from day to day. Kylie Jenner seems to think so, too.

The Jeans
Boyfriend jeans are the talk of the fashion industry. Instead of buying “women” boyfriend jeans, borrow a pair from your actual boyfriend. If you’re single, borrow some from a male friend. Cuff the jeans at the bottom and tighten them up with a cute belt. Wearing these with heels makes your whole look sexy.

I was born into a family of ridiculously good looking men.

Whenever my friends come to my house for the first time and see an old photograph of my dad as a young man, they’ll fawn over the photo and ask which actor it is. My older brother’s nickname is “Handsome Jack” and whenever my girlfriends would come to my house after school they’d always find an excuse to go and hang out with him. I saw first-hand from an early age the power of an attractive man.

Unfortunately, I was born possibly the plainest-looking child ever, and grew into an ordinary-looking young woman; however, that’s never stopped me from dating men who could be the lead in a CW show. The great Courtney Love once said, “You don’t have to be beautiful to fuck whoever you want,” and it’s true. Once I learned that, I stopped believing that I had to look like Scarlett Johannson to date guys who looked like Ryan Reynolds.

I am not a shallow person. I’m not going to go out with someone just because they’re really good looking, and not all of the guys I’ve gone out with have been. I’m always going to expect the men I date to be kind, funny, generous and intelligent, but really good looks are the cherry on top of the cake.

VIDEO: Here’s the Real Reason You’re Attracted to Your Partner

However, going out with a really good looking man isn’t the same as going out with a normal one, and there’s stuff you need to know before embarking on your poster boy escapades.

People will make sure you know how lucky you are.

You know when you wear a dress that’s too small for you, and you walk around all day paranoid that it’s going to rip, or that someone’s going to shout at you to put some trousers on? Going out with a really good looking guy is a lot like that.

Even the people closest to you, who usually tell you what an amazing and beautiful girl you are, will frequently remind you just how lucky you are to go out with someone so handsome.”No, but he’s really hot,” translates to “How did you trick someone like that into having sex with you?”

Upon dating my first really hot guy, a friend took me aside and told me to make sure to hang on to him at all costs. As an awkward 17-year-old, I agreed with her, until I thought the conversation over later and realized what she meant: Whatever magic you’re working on this guy will wear off soon, and he’ll realize how out of your league he is.

No matter how kind or thoughtful you are, or how many books you’ve read, or how amazing your personality is, according to society, if a guy is better looking than you, he automatically holds the aces, and you’ll forever be in his debt. And it won’t just be your friends who tell you how lucky you are, you’ll do it to yourself, too.

I once agonized for weeks about breaking up with a guy because every time I’d think of doing it, I’d stop myself because he was so beautiful and I thought I’d never find anyone half as handsome as him. But you know what? I’m a bomb-ass bitch, and I deserve more than a guy who cheats on his girlfriend, no matter how many girls want to write poems about his face.

Really good looking guys are public property.

Openly admitting you want to have sex with your friend’s boyfriend is not OK, unless he’s really good looking. Get used to people telling you how good your beau looks in his new profile pic, or how they secretly perv over him at the gym. Total strangers will think it’s perfectly fine to ask if your boyfriend looks as good naked as he does clothed as if for some reason, daring to walk around with a beautiful face leaves you open to public commentary.

You’ll come under scrutiny too -– people will wonder what’s so amazing about you that you managed to land a boy whose looks are so superior to yours. I’ll hold my hands up and admit that I’ve looked at celebrities and their average-looking partners and told myself that they must be rich, or really funny, or be filthy in bed. It wasn’t until I was one of those girlfriends people questioned that I realized that it’s not OK to assume that a person had to be exceptional in some other way to be able to live up to a gorgeous other half.

A relationship is not a see-saw whereby the less attractive partner has to make-up for it by being exemplary in some other field to be equally balanced.

Really good looking guys don’t know they’re really good looking.

OK, so some do, and are total dicks about it, but the majority don’t. I once went out with a guy who was the closest thing to a living, breathing Adonis statue you can imagine. Women would literally turn their heads and gasp as he walked down the street. The first night I met him I asked what it was like to be told how beautiful you are everyday of your life and he looked confused.

At first I thought he was trying to play it cool and be all humble about it, but he’d honestly never been told how handsome he is. People either (wrongly) assumed that he was a douche and didn’t need to be reminded in case his head exploded, or thought that he got told so regularly that it would be like asking him if he had the time.

Handsome men aren’t approached by women half as often as average-looking ones, because everyone assumes that they aren’t pretty enough for them and that they’ll be rejected. They often thereby have no idea how good looking they are. They’re usually completely oblivious to the doors their looks open, and presume that everybody gets free coffee from Starbucks. I’ve never gotten free coffee in my life and believe me, I’ve tried.

People think really good looking guys are either dumb or self-obsessed.

From an early age, we’re bombarded with the message that if you’re given good looks, you’re deprived in some other department. One of the most common stereotypes about good looking people is that they’re handed life on a plate, and so don’t develop a personality, or that they don’t ever have to think for themselves and therefore have problems in the brain department. NOT TRUE.

In fact, it probably works the other way around, because the person in question constantly has to work harder than most to prove they aren’t just a pretty face and be taken seriously. One of the most frequent things you’re asked when dating a really good looking guy is “Is he actually nice?”

People will often assume that the guy is vain or self-obsessed, when they couldn’t be further from the truth with any of the men I’ve dated.

Really good looking guys aren’t Gods.

They’re actually as human as you or I. It’s sometimes hard to believe that really good looking guys are made from the same stuff as us regular people, but beyond their faces, they don’t have any other magical powers.

I’m a proud and self-confessed creep, and there’s nothing I love more than watching people sleep. When you’re in bed with a really good looking guy, and he’s lying there next to you, you start to feel sick and nervous and start panicking that he’s going to wake up and demand to know what a girl like you is doing in his bed and why you’re staring at him. But then he’ll snore, or mumble something incoherent and you realize that he’s a mere mortal too.

Once you realize this, you can act like a living, breathing person in front of them and stop brushing your hair again.

Beautiful people are held up in the media as demi-Gods, but in real life, somebody’s looks do not make them worth any more than any other person. As the popular saying goes, even the Queen shits.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

Do you have someone special that you call your girl or boyfriend? How often do you try to look hot for them? Although you don’t have to look good for your boo all the time, the fact is that while you aren’t, someone else already is. There are four specific reasons why you still need to look hot for your girl or boyfriend. Scroll to the bottom to see how these reasons also apply to long-distance lovers.

1. This Sh*t’s Not Set In Stone

With easy access to people through dating apps and social media, it’s never been easier to go shopping for a new squeeze if your current one has stopped trying to dress up. There’s a whole world of gorgeous people out there that know how to treat men and women the way they deserve to be treated. And if they’re not on hinge, insta, or bumble, they’re probably at the gym or in your partner’s math class every other day. Did I make you uneasy? Good. Do your best to go out of your way to show your partner they chose right.

Girls, let your hair down. It may not seem like much to you, but from a guy’s perspective, your hair acts as another weapon against our emotional defense mechanisms. Undo that scrunchie and act like nothing just happened. Guys, throw that trucker hat back on your bed, put some gel through your hair, dress up, and show your confidence to not wear your hat once in a while. Your partner will see it even if they don’t mention it.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

2. We Overlook General Hygiene

Here’s a reminder that while we’re dating someone, we tend to overlook what we used to be hyper aware of before we met them. If you haven’t been blessed with Chris Hemsworth-like facial hair, then shave yours. Your partner will feel more pain than pleasure at the abrasive feeling of your sandpaper face on theirs while you makeout. Do you choose not to shave down there (and I mean down there) not out of principle, but laziness? Shaving instead of not is the safer bet when you feel caught between the two options. Have you noticed a pattern of your partner mentioning, very nicely, how tattered or smelly your shoes are? Not a bad idea to put a new pair of nice looking kicks on the B-Day or holiday wish list. Do you clean your room and wash your laundry regularly? Get on that for obvious cleanliness reasons. Last one: do you wash your body when you two hangout…?

How to look hot for your boyfriend

3. Netflix Is Not Life

While Netflix and Chill is far from the wrong thing to do, building a non-stop habit of dressing down in grey sweats and groaning at your slow wi-fi can leave a lot to be expected. It’s no secret that once we feel comfortable enough with our hubby, we can begin to limit going out on nicer dates or even going out at all. As a partner to someone oh-so-special, you don’t want things to get grey and slow. How do I fix this? Read on.

3. Unexpected Is Hot

Doing the unexpected fulfills everyone’s fantasy of being pleasurably surprised. One night, I was bored, so I decided to dress up for my girlfriend. I put some shorts on that made my butt look good, put a tee on that my gf loves me in, and I surprised her at her register before closing time. I didn’t have to put on a tux to make an impact, and we didn’t take any pics to make my outfit ‘worth it’. Guys out there, I didn’t even wait till things got stagnant. If you have an opportunity to surprise him or her, do it.

How To Enjoy Time Alone After A Breakup

Show your bae how much you care by doing something unexpected for them. Perfect opportunities for this are casual dates because the setting does not call for nice apparel, but you will bring it anyway. This will show that you dressed nice not for the venue, but for your partner.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

For Long Distance Lovers (Me Being One Of Them):

The easiest way to remind your boo of how good you look when they’re not around is to send pics of your outfit while you’re at work lookin’ like the young professional you are, or at the gym wishing they could see your butt while you do those mountain climbers. You’ll make your partner bite their lip in anticipation for the next time they get to bite yours.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

Did I inspire you to dress up more often now? Or am I wrong on some things? Drop a caret (^) in the comments below if you agree with something I wrote. Comment.

Images via,, pinterest and Instagram @chrishemsworth.
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He’s done it quite a few times to women on the tv ‘oh she’s fit’ ‘i’d have sex with her anyday’ ‘not bad for an older women’ ‘wow she’s hot’ which I guess is fine as its on the tv and like clearly he is going to like other girls. I have no problems with him fancying other women its fine, he is a man of course he is allowed too look at other girls, just as much as I think certain filmstars are hot if a girl walked past him in a club and he thought she was hot and eyed her up thats fine as long as it stopped at the eyeing up.

But recently he has started doing it about girls I know, random girls in the street for instance he was driving me to a club on wednesday and as he drove past he slowed down where there were 3 girls, who were clearly a bit tarty, with there massive hair extentions fake tan, and their bums hanging out of their skirts and boobs spilling out their tops with their sky scraper heels ( im not like this as all im quite tomboyish im more a hotpants and corset sorta girl!) they also looked about 15 and he said ‘I’d bang that god their fit’ which is fine but im not one of his lads he should of kep that too himself ? also it made me feel a bit ugly as he never said anything about how I looked, he also did it when we all finished in the gym he later said about my friend ‘she’s got a hot bum in leggings’ there is always an awkward silence after he says this stuff as I dont know what too say when he commented on the girls in the club I said ‘ yeah they are pretty’ but I dont know its wierd that my boyfriends ttelling me about the girls he fancies??

He doesn’t seem to be offering you much, so don’t just ‘make do’, says Mariella Frostrup

‘I have to restrain my impulse to shout, “Just dump him!”’ says Mariella Frostrup. Photograph: Heidi Schawel/

‘I have to restrain my impulse to shout, “Just dump him!”’ says Mariella Frostrup. Photograph: Heidi Schawel/

The dilemma I have been dating my boyfriend for three months. He is intelligent and thoughtful, sensitive and funny. We are in our 30s and have the same long-term goals – to travel, see where life takes us and not add children to a relationship.

I wasn’t physically attracted to him, but the way he treats me convinced me to give it a go. I’m not convinced there’s enough “spark” and find myself inwardly picking apart his appearance and his unwavering devotion to me, which I find soppy and cloying. Some things actively turn me off, for example chewing food loudly with his mouth open and getting food all over his face, or the way he dresses. Then I feel guilty as he would not judge me in the same way.

I have dated some very attractive men in the past and valued physical attractiveness probably too highly. Most of these boyfriends were narcissistic and made me feel insecure about my own attractiveness, something I am usually confident about. I am agonising about throwing away a relationship with a man who really adores me.

Should I let him go or stick with it?

Mariella replies Life can, in some ways, be very short. You’ve written to me at a point in the year when I tend to feel reckless and impatient – “out with the old” becoming my increasingly frenzied mantra! It’s perhaps not the best state of mind to be delivering advice, but happily, in your case, it might be. Normally I’m all about compromise. As I regularly reiterate, few relationships survive the course without epic levels of endurance and tolerance from both parties so, in principle, you’re right to be trying to square the positives with the negatives in this new liaison. Your boyfriend’s assets look impressive on paper, if a little generic. A man who’s thoughtful, intelligent, sensitive and funny isn’t to be sniffed at, but listed thus they sound like a stereotype rather than a personal engagement. Sure, he sounds like a nice guy but, despite the propaganda suggesting otherwise, there are plenty of them about – it’s finding one that’s tuned to your wavelength that counts.

What does he have to offer apart from the fact that he’s not a bastard? I appreciate you have to kiss a lot of frogs, but it doesn’t follow that you need to jump at the first man blessed with less cold-blooded characteristics. My sense is that you’re in retreat and making do. I have to restrain my impulse to shout: “Just dump him!”

Starting with pure worshipful passion helps down the line

It’s not only you I’m worried about. You say you’ve had your fair share of narcissists who’ve made you feel unattractive. So you’ll be well aware how painful it is to be judged and found wanting. You’ve said you find this guy a bit soppy which suggests he’s eager for your approval and will bruise easily. Why inflict unnecessary pain on a man whose only crime is to have fallen for you with too much enthusiasm? Issues with table manners and dress sense might appear superficial now, but their ability to irritate is likely to increase over the years. In my experience there’s no such thing as a small turn off.

We are none of us perfect, which is why falling in love is so seductive because, for a brief time in our lover’s eyes, we feel flawless. Right now you are both still shrouded in mystery to each other, but eventually you’ll be naked, your real selves fully exposed and those early imperfections will join a slew of more onerous ones. Starting with a clean slate and pure worshipful passion is extremely helpful down the line. Those sense memories of perfect union are sometimes all we have to keep going through more challenging times. You need to bank blissful days for future retrieval, like stashing an energy bar in your pocket for a long trek.

Passion, as we know, dwindles over time, so the elements that are off-putting now certainly won’t feel less so when repeated a thousand times over. You do need to sweat the small stuff when it comes to enduring companionship. As much as your petty quibbles can become homicide-inducing annoyances, so your judgmental disdain will fester in his heart over months and years. Sure you can change the way he dresses and maybe even retrain him when it comes to his table manners, but refashioning him into an image you desire is hardly likely to make him more appealing to you. A partner whose habits revolt you within the very earliest months of courtship does not bode well.

I’m interested in why you’re so keen to settle. You say you want an adventurous life, unshackled by children and commitment. So where’s the upside for you in 1950s-style coupledom? If you feel like taking time out from robust dating to inhabit a calmer more nurturing partnership, there’s no harm in hanging in the doldrums for a while. But don’t dissect him like a laboratory animal. He is what you see before you and if he doesn’t match your standards move on. Finding a fleeting lover can be a treated like a beauty contest, but when it comes to long-term relationships, pretty goddam perfect is the baseline to start the courtship dance on.

If you do the things listed below, the force of attraction between you and the partner will remain just as strong as it was when you first met.

To be irresistible means to to be so attractive and so tempting that your partner just can’t get enough of you. And this is not just in a sexual sense.

It really won’t matter that your relationship has been on for a long time. If you are irresistible enough, it also won’t matter that they have seen so many times and in different situations, circumstances and postures.

If you do the things listed below, the force of attraction between you and the partner will remain just as strong as it was when you first met [or as close to that as possible!]

1. Don’t be clingy

To be irresistible, start with being independent. No one likes a clinger. Just because there’s a guy in your life doesn’t mean your life is now completely over. Guys love women who don’t change their entire world for them.

Men also have things they want to do, maybe watch a hockey game or hang out with their friends alone. Sure, if he invites you, go. But showing him that you go out without him and do things on your own is a huge turn on.

2. Look sexier

Men are visual beings. So get to know the several ways to start looking sexier but do it slowly and steadily so the changes look subtle and not forced.

Get yourself a new hairstyle, add hot and colourful pieces of clothing to your wardrobe; eye liners are said to work wonders with accentuating the darkness of your eyes making you look really hot. Wear a mild shade of lipstick, something which looks subtle and accentuates your lips.

Remember that you don’t have to use heavy make up if you don’t want to. When you look sexy outside you feel sexy inside and you radiate that confidence.

3. Make him feel desired

That’s right. Your partner wants to feel desired, too! To make yourself irresistible, one of the things to do is to make your man feel wanted. Initiate sex, send him cute sexy messages, say nice things about his body.

If he feels wanted and desired with you, he’ll likely keep coming to you. That is a pull he won’t be able to resist.

4. Love yourself

Love who you are, love your body. Remove all the negative thoughts in your mind regarding your self image. One of the worst things you can do is to regularly worry and sly force your partner’s reassurances about your body despite your partner’s relentless reminder that he finds you so hot and so sexy.

Love yourself and your body enough to believe that he wants you just the way you are. When you start loving yourself, the positive vibrations it creates will automatically cause a deep-seated happiness and as a result, an attraction that your partner will always find irresistible.

5. Be free with him

Do not let things get in the way of enjoying bonding time together with your partner. When you are with your man, you may want to ditch all the good girl behavior your mum taught you while growing up. Be playful, be wild, talk dirty, be ‘slutty’, be everything with him.

Don’t be the same formal woman you are when you are at work. Unleash the part of you that you’re unwilling to show other people of the world. Let out the freak in you [if he’s into freaky stuff, too].

Checking out gorgeous people isn’t cheating. But it also isn’t far removed from it. Here’s what the expert says about rubbernecking spouses.


How to look hot for your boyfriend

To be clear, checking out attractive people — rubbernecking every time a beautiful woman comes into view — is not cheating. There are plenty of forms of non-sexual cheating: Emotional infidelity by text, emails with a passionate pen pal, or a recurring coffee date where you get deep into feelings. But looking? For your relationship at least, it is mostly harmless. At least, as long as you leave it at a glance.

“Just because you are in a committed relationship doesn’t mean you’re dead — you’re still going to notice beautiful people,” says Caroline Madden, Ph.D., a licensed marriage and family therapist in Burbank, California, and author After a Good Man Cheats: How to Rebuild Trust & Intimacy with Your Wife. “It is human to glance, so if you notice someone good looking, it’s generally okay. It’s more about not letting that slippery slope happen.”

That slippery slope is when you realize you’re attracted to someone (fine) but then pursue further contact with them (not fine). “Good men fool themselves into thinking there is no real risk of cheating and then get close to a person they are attracted to,” says Madden. “That’s why anyone you have the feels for in any way, shape, or form — no matter whether you think they feel the same way about you or not — you should not engage in a one-on-one relationship with them going forward.”

Research published last year in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology backs up the idea that looking at other attractive people alone doesn’t dictate infidelity risk. After following 233 newlywed couples for three and a half years, researchers at Florida State University discovered that those who looked away quickly after spotting an attractive other were 50 percent less likely to cheat on their partner than those who held their gaze on someone they found fetching.

Another new set of studies, published in the Journal of Family Psychology this past August, showed that looking at beautiful people besides your partner isn’t necessarily risky — if you can exhibit self-control and resist acting on temptation.

“Whether looking at attractive people is harmful or not depends on the person doing the looking,” says lead researcher Ashlyn Brady, a psychology graduate student at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro. “If they have a high tendency to notice attractive people other than their partner, it can be a problem if they generally have low self-control or are experiencing impaired self-control, such as when they are tired, stressed, or intoxicated.” Either situation, she says, may make someone more apt to cheat than someone who is adept at nipping temptation in the bud, even when they’re sleep-deprived or drunk.

Although these studies suggest that men looking at other women doesn’t always dictate cheating, don’t mistake them for a green light to ogle away without worry. If enjoying the scenery becomes a routine practice, it might be time to look inward and at the health of your relationship.

“In general, if you start to notice other people more or there is someone who you want to look at or talk to more, it could mean you are not getting your needs met in your relationship,” Madden says. “This is where taking that energy and putting it back into the relationship becomes so important. Ask yourself what is really going on.” When men are feeling less-than or like their masculinity is being challenged, Madden says they sometimes start to seek validation from women; this, of course, can start that slippery slope.

Another big caveat to the “it’s fine to look as long as you don’t touch” premise, is that it’s never acceptable to eye up others while your partner is present — especially if it’s more of a lingering look than a quick glance.

“That is extremely disrespectful to your wife, and she should have the reaction of ‘what the hell are you doing?’” Madden says. “If you have a regular habit of looking at other women, gazing a little too long, trying to make eye contact, or looking at their breasts while you are with your partner, you probably don’t have the maturity to be in that relationship. Why are you trying to get this person’s attention if the next step is not cheating?”

Taking all of this into consideration, don’t beat yourself up for noticing someone who’s good-looking — but don’t assume it’s entirely safe either. Accept that you find the person hot, own the fact that you looked (quickly, hopefully), then move on. Any interaction with them beyond that, though, and you could be setting yourself up to make a huge mistake.

  • 12:45, 23 Feb 2022
  • Updated : 12:46, 23 Feb 2022
  • Invalid Date,

A WOMAN has shared how she has an ‘insanely hot’ boyfriend – despite claiming to be ‘average looking’.

TikTok user Hazel McBride jumped on the viral trend after seeing a video comparing Pete Davidson with Kim Kardashian.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

How to look hot for your boyfriend

How to look hot for your boyfriend

The caption read: “When are we gonna see insanely hot men with average looking women?”

The trend comes after many people took to social media to ask how American comedian Pete Davidson was able to date a string of beautiful women – suggesting he is punching above his weight.

Turning the question around, author and killer whale trainer Hazel jokingly showed a clip of her and her ‘insanely hot’ boyfriend.

Social media users flocked to the comments to share their thoughts on the clip.

One said: “You have beautiful features and seem like the sweetest person ever so definitely a win for him.”

Another added: “No, you’re literally on the same level as him.

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A third commented: “We see a happy couple together and that’s what matters.”

A fourth user said: “I’m yet to see a video that actually matches this audio.”

One TikToker wrote: “Most of the comments are not it. she did a meme and its funny. No need for all the negativity”

I’m a beauty expert – six TikTok beauty trends making your breakouts worse & why toothpaste on spots is NOT a good idea

Hazel replied: “finally someone gets it.”

The self-depreciating video has gone viral, racking up over 130,000 likes and more than 600 comments.

We pay for your stories and videos! Do you have a story or video for The Scottish Sun? Email us at [email protected] or call 0141 420 5300

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Most Helpful Guys

Before you were going out and were dressing up, you were doing it to look “presentable” to people (attractive guys), and now that you’re boyfriend and g/f, he doesn’t want you to still dress like you’re “dressed to impress”.

There’s more to it than this, but I gotta get something to eat after a workout.

Most Helpful Girls

As long as you don’t look slutty or trashy, he shouldn’t be worried.

That’s his problem of having insecurities, even if guys do check you out or hit on u, he should trust you enough to not flirt back with the guys

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Related Questions

What Girls & Guys Said

pretty simple put it’s one of the following

1he doesn’t want other guys hitting on you, or even looking at you and having thoughts like that flash though their heads even if it’s only momentarily

2 he’s insecure and worried about losing you to another guy(though I seriously doubt this option but still it is a possibly

3 it’s a matter of control

though there is only one way to know for sure and that is to talk to him directly and ask him why he now doesn’t like it

Words by Leika Golez

Relationships are complicated. So needless to say, couples will inevitably get into arguments, and those fights can be about anything and everything under the sun. When you get comfortable around someone you spend so much time with, you’re bound to butt heads. And that’s completely normal! Until he starts telling you what to wear.

It’s one thing to be protective, but another to be controlling. When your boyfriend tells you to change into something “more conservative”, then maybe you should reconsider your relationship. In situations like this, there’s a very fine line between genuine concern and unhealthy possessiveness. And contrary to popular belief, him policing your outfits definitely isn’t cute. Here’s why.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

It’s emotionally abusive.

Remember that manipulative partners start small. You may let it slide and pass it off as something trivial, but the little things build up. Besides, do you really want to be with someone who polices your outfits? You’re not supposed to feel restricted in a relationship.

On the contrary, your partner is supposed to encourage growth. He’s supposed to support the things that make you feel happy and confident, and that includes your fashion.

Teach men not to rape rather than telling girls how not to dress so they don’t get raped.

Teach men to control their inordinate gargantuan appetite for sex and tell them it is not okay at all to rape any woman.

Tell them it is never okay to rape.#DontTellMeHowToDress

It’s an example of rape culture.

Magpalit ka para ‘di ka tingnan”. Yup, we’ve heard it all before. If he tells you to change into something more “conservative” to avoid sexual harassment, then he’s the problem. Even in this day and age, some boys still don’t get it. Rape victims still get blamed for wearing revealing clothes. But instead of teaching girls how to dress, why don’t we just teach boys how to control their urges? We have zero tolerance for the whole boys-will-be-boys mindset, and even your boyfriend isn’t an exception to that.

A post shared by Empowering Women Now (@empoweringwomennow) on Aug 5, 2017 at 6:10am PDT

It’s a sign of insecurity.
It’s highly possible that this issue stems from his lack of confidence. Instead of being proud of how hot his girlfriend is, he feels fiercely possessive of her. And only because deep down, he’s afraid that he’s not good enough to stay with her. But you should never have to compromise your self-expression for his insecurity. If he can’t reassure himself, then perhaps he’s not ready to be with you. You deserve someone whole, not someone who will force you to adjust for their personal benefit.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

It’s your body.

It’s quite simple. Is it his outfit? Nope! So he has no right to tell you what you can and cannot wear. Remember, you’re not wearing it to impress him, or anybody else for that matter. You’re dressing up for yourself.

Nobody, not even your boyfriend, has the right to make you feel inferior just because of your style. If he can’t handle it, then run like the wind. Believe me, you’ll reach the finish line much faster without him. So the next time he tells you to fix your outfit, tell him to fix his own problems first.

What do you think? Let us know!

How to look hot for your boyfriend

The below story was originally published in July 2017, but when it came up in a recent editorial meeting, we couldn’t stop talking about it (for a second time). Usually, double-tapping a photo feels fairly low stakes, but if this story is any indication, it can say quite a lot. Read on and weigh in if you feel stirred by this debate, too.

If you’ve ever found yourself deep on your ex’s Instagram post-breakup, you know that the app can make it difficult to move on. Lurking on social media is a classic form of self-sabotage for the heartbroken, but I’ve found it especially challenging to navigate when I’m in a relationship.

Have you ever scrolled through your Discover feed and realized that Instagram’s algorithm has surfaced a photo of a mysterious girl for you because the person you’re dating liked it? I have. Multiple times, with one particular guy. Each time, my life would descend into chaos. I’d take screenshots, text my friends, call my mom and, of course, try to figure out who in the world that girl even was.

We were a few months into our relationship the first time it happened; he was working across the country at the time. After seeing his likes on booty pic after booty pic, I started wondering what in the world was going on 2,000 miles away. (And, more pressingly, was there something wrong with my butt?) When I finally worked up the nerve to mention it, I did so over text and received a really apologetic and understanding response. I thought the issue was settled.

Fast forward one year. We’re still together, I’m scrolling through Instagram and there it is again: a trail of likes on unfamiliar women’s photos. Seriously? I felt an all-too-familiar wave of nausea. I again resorted to sending him a text asking what was up with all the liking. The answer I got wasn’t as receptive as the last; he said something along the lines of, “Am I not allowed to think my friends look good?” That he actually knew them somehow irked me more. He eventually toned down the defensiveness and told me it didn’t mean anything, and that’s what I tried to focus on.

I’m not going to pretend it didn’t matter to me. With hindsight, it’s clear how much it did. I remember feeling completely crushed and unappreciated. Even today, I’m still unsure whether my reaction was warranted. I’m still not confident of whose perspective, mine or his, was more in need of adjusting. On one hand, I’m on Instagram mindlessly liking pictures all day. Maybe he was, too. On the other, his actions felt like a betrayal of trust the way my liking photos of shoes never would. I recall a friend comparing his liking to checking out a girl on the street — weren’t they both harmless? I understood her point; even in the thick of love, a living, breathing human can still notice a person is attractive. And yet, this felt more hurtful than an on-the-street glance.

All relationships are different, but when I found myself years-deep in a random woman’s Instagram at 4 a.m., I realized that mine was nothing if I didn’t trust my boyfriend. Eventually our relationship ended. I’d hesitate to cite the Instagram liking as an actual reason — there were a few things wrong — but I know now that, for me, it’s important to create boundaries for what I choose to take in and disclose. Instagram may be the framework through which we choose to see and share information, but how we interact with it is our prerogative. Nowadays, the only photos I click on in my Discover feed are those of well-dressed chihuahuas, and I don’t scroll through my followers’ activities.

On Instagram, we have the power to present ourselves in the way we want, whether that’s true to who we really are or not. My ex-boyfriend claimed his behavior was not flirtatious, yet he still felt compelled to double-tap — to send the tiniest beam of communication. Perhaps I was being naive, or perhaps there is a larger social narrative at play here, where men are so accustomed to evaluating women that they practically don’t even notice themselves doing it.

Have you experienced this? What do you think about it? I’m eager to hear more perspectives.

Feature photo via @emrata.

A dude explains the unexpected items of clothing he loves seeing you in.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

You probably have a pretty clear idea of what you think is sexy and date-appropriate (lipstick, heels, cute dresses) and what falls on the frumpy side of the spectrum (sweats, turtlenecks, button-downs). But you might be surprised by what turns guys on. And I should know—after all, I am a dude. Check out which seemingly innocent looks actually turn us into major hornballs.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

It’s the vanilla ice cream of outfits. But you know what? It’s hard to go wrong with a classic. A T-shirt that fits just snug enough and a pair of jeans that accentuate your shape scream girl next door in all the right ways. You know what else is great about vanilla ice cream? You can add anything you want to it. It’s plain, but you can make it fancy with some simple additions.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

The infamous outfit from Risky Business is just as sexy on a woman as it was on Tom Cruise. Sure, it’s ill-fitting. Sure, it feels like pajamas. But it puts your legs on display—which we love—and leaves just enough to the imagination.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

You probably have an inkling that men love tight-fitting yoga pants already. But that’s not what I’m talking about here. If you’re showing signs of voluntary physical activity (an impressive feat in this day and age, America), then you’ve automatic earned sexy points in most guys’ books. So bring on the shorts and high socks. Mmmm.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

What’s sexier than looking like the late Steve Jobs? Kidding. Believe it or not, the T-neck is kind of sexy. It’s comfortable and cute and even a little mysterious. And women usually wear them in the wintertime, a.k.a. the season of snuggling.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

Okay, this isn’t an item of clothing. But it’s a great example of how something can be both easy and sexy. Plus, every guy’s first crush wore her hair in a ponytail. It’s a fact.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

We know you wear them when you haven’t washed your hair in a while, but beanies give off an edgy-cool-cute vibe we can’t get enough of. So feel free to wear them when your hair is clean, too.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

I know that plain black pencil skirt and blouse makes you feel super uptight. Perhaps that suit and heels isn’t comfortable at all. Maybe that apron is dirty and greasy. Whether you work on Wall Street or at Whataburger, your work clothes can be hot. It shows us that you’re independent and obviously are intelligent and skilled enough to get that job, and that’s sexy. Besides, all men have had fantasies ranging from getting with the cafeteria worker to getting with the CEO.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

Lady Gaga doesn’t wear what she does because it’s high fashion. Trust me; sirloin steak dresses have never been a thing and will never be a thing. She wears them because she feels comfortable in them. Somehow, they suit her well (in the case of the steak dress. medium-well). That’s what makes her attractive to guys. She is comfortable and confident—and those will look just as good as you as they do on her.

Modern love is hard work. Between navigating unsolicited dick pics and thinking up not-lame answers to Hinge prompts, dating in the digital age comes with a lot of stressors. But none are quite as nerve-wracking as the moment when the group chat asks for a photo of the new person you’re seeing.

We all know how it goes. You’ve been dating for a couple of weeks now and naturally, your friends are all curious. “Send a pic!” they say. So, you grab a screenshot from his or her Instagram and hit send. But then you notice that the picture isn’t actually that flattering. Maybe the lighting’s weird or their outfit doesn’t look as good as it did IRL. Before your mates have even had a chance to respond, you find yourself bizarrely vouching for your new crush’s attractiveness, like some desperate lawyer in a trial for hotness.

I admit to having done this countless times, but I’m no less baffled by my own behaviour. Surely it’s weird to want your mates to find your partner attractive – you’re the one dating them, after all. But for many, a friend’s opinion can be a huge factor in deciding whether someone is worth seeing.

AJ was gearing up to meet a match on Hinge when a friend’s comparison left things turning sour. “I sent his photo to one of my friends. At first he didn’t say anything, but after pushing for a response he just sent a picture of Megamind,” she says. “After that, I couldn’t not see that the guy had a really large forehead. I went on the date, but it was not a good time – I was sat there talking to his forehead.”

AJ isn’t the only person to have a friend’s unexpected disapproval put them off. “I had a friend that called a girl I was talking to hideous,” says Oso. “I was shocked he could say something like that, but as bad as it sounds, I did not view her the same way after he made the comment. We did not last.”

Clearly, some friends aren’t afraid to let you know that your fantasy spouse-to-be is actually pretty clapped. But research shows that taking their response to heart might not be as shallow as it seems.

Dr. Taha Yasseri is a social science researcher at Oxford University whose work covers both human dynamics and online dating. He says that there might be an evolutionary component to why we want others to approve our romantic partners. “Social influence and the way that we affect each other’s behaviour has been a mechanism to help our societies grow and sustain,” he says. “To survive, we needed to live in groups and communities with an identity; to create that identity we copy each other’s behaviour.”

Yasseri’s research suggests that social conformity within friendship groups can affect individual behaviours, such as music listening choices. This can extend to who we date, and we often validate our dating choices using the opinions of others. “We know that attractiveness is fluid and more of a social construct, rather than something someone could define, and the most appealing evidence for that is how attractiveness trends change from country to country,” he says. “Because attractiveness is socially defined, the best way for us to confirm that we are following the same rules is to try to get the confirmation from our social circles.”

This checked out with many of the people I spoke to. Most agreed that they sought reassurance from friends that they had chosen a good partner. “If you walk past a restaurant and there’s nobody inside, you become a bit concerned – like, why is that restaurant empty?” says Doyin*. “So if you’re seeing this guy or you’re interested and people find him repellent, you start to second guess. Because why does everyone think he’s ugly? That means he’s ugly!”

Sharing a photo of the new person you’re seeing can have other benefits, too. Tor is non-binary and has experience dating both men and women. “My attraction leans more towards girls,” they explain, “so I find that with guys, I’m not sure how much it’s me or compulsory heterosexuality thinking I should be attracted to a guy that’s conventionally attractive. It helps me assess my own opinion.”

It’s fine to enjoy the ego boost that comes from having an attractive partner. But the problem arises when the number of flame emojis their pic earns in the group chat becomes a deciding factor in whether to keep dating them. We should all be mature enough to be able to date whoever we want, regardless of what our pals say or what they look like.

“The trend of receiving influence from more friends is not necessarily a bad thing,” Yasseri says. “But we have to know the parameters and take control back.”

*Name has been changed.

This article originally appeared on VICE UK.


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TIMESOFINDIA.COM | Last updated on – Oct 14, 2020, 01:00 IST

01 /8 7 guys share what they like to see their partners wear to bed

Guys will always have an opinion on what should you wear to bed even if they tell you “Anything you want!” Intimacy is very vision-specific and if you’re aiming to have one of those nights with your man, you must know what he’d prefer to see on you for starters. Here are some guys who answered, “What should your partner wear to bed?’

02 /8 An oversized tee

“An oversized t-shirt on my girlfriend always works for me. I think it’s because it’s a bit of a tease. It’s also quite effortless. She doesn’t have to try to be sexy but she still really is with just that tee on.”

03 /8 Comfy pajamas

“I really feel that women who are comfortable in their own skin look really sexy. So my wife puts on her comfy pajamas to bed and I can’t help but check her out with her little confidence and comfort. It’s kinda sexy to me.”

04 /8 Just panties

“My girl knows exactly how to drive me crazy. She’ll put on her panties and walk around me with just that on her. It sets up the mood so quickly. It never fails to work on me!”

05 /8 My shirts

“My wife has always had a thing to steal my clothes ever since we were dating. I’ve given up on telling her to not keep stealing my clothes. But I have to give it to her that she looks extra hot in my buttoned-down shirts and rolled-up sleeves with no pants.”

06 /8 A tight t-shirt

“My ex-girlfriend had a worn-out tee that didn’t fit her so well. But I still found it extra sexy whenever she’d wear it to bed with no bra on. Just too tempting to have a guy hooked to such a sight!”

07 /8 Lacy lingerie

“When my girl wants to put me in a mood, she’ll put on this lacy black lingerie and tip-toe her way to bed. My jaws drop every single time I see her wearing that and her sexy little walk. Turns me on and how!”

08 /8 Booty shorts

“How can a guy ever resist a girl who wears booty shorts to bed? It is so visually appealing, I will have all my attention on my girl if she chooses to wear booty shorts around me in the bedroom. It’s so hot!”

Tired of playing the good girl? No worries! We’re about to help you unleash your inner sex goddess! He’s going to want you even more after you put these clever tips into practice… Without making you look too obvious in your approach, we’re going to help you give him subtle hints. Are you ready to catch his attention in the most seductive fashion? Here are 11 clever ways to tease your boyfriend.

1. A Sexy Selfie Of Yourself

Whether you choose to change your Whatsapp display picture or send it to him directly, both ways work! Seeing you pose in that gorgeous black dress will instantly have his eyes glued to the screen. We bet the guy won’t stop fantasizing about you once he sees your picture! *Wink*

How to look hot for your boyfriend

2. Some Pretty Hot Lingerie

Remember girls, when it comes to picking up lingerie – the kinkier, the better! For your man, it’s not just visually pleasing to look at, but also helps turn up the heat in between the sheets! Trust us, once you take off that dress and give him a sneak peak, his hands are going to be ALL over you.

3. Showering In Front Of Him

Without giving him a hint, step into the bathroom, undress, turn on the hot shower and keep the door slightly open. Watching you make eye contact with him while you bathe is going to make him go weak in the knees! Here’s a tip: Try inviting him in the shower with you next time.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

4. A Little Striptease Didn’t Hurt Anyone

He may not have mentioned it, but every guy loves a good striptease session. You performing for him, makes him feel desirable and special. Feel free to let your hair loose, touch yourself and make lots of eye contact while unbuttoning your shirt. Works like a charm!

5. Dirty Dancing Is Always Welcome

Put on some slow music and groove to the beat in your prettiest dress and tallest heels. Put your arm around his waist and sway around the room like nobody’s watching the both of you. He’ll know where this is heading! *Blush*

How to look hot for your boyfriend

6. Flip Your Hair Back & Forth

Weird but true, flipping your hair can make a guy feel a lot of sexy things about you. The trick is to make it look natural and not intentional. Refrain from eye contact and do that sexy thing with your hair. He’ll be swooning over you for good!

7. The Perfume Of Seduction

Most guys love a woman who smells good. Your boyfriend is no exception here. Choosing the right perfume will draw him towards you. Opt for musk, licorice, lily, red velvet or vanilla, and you’ll have him in your arms all day and night.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

8. Lace For The Win

The beauty of wearing lace is that it reveals just enough skin without being too obvious. It’s classy and makes any girl look irresistible. Lingerie, dresses and tops in colours of red, black, mauve, navy blue and ivory, always steal the show!

9. Text Him Something Sinfully Naughty

Sending him a naughty text while he’s at work is the best and easiest way to make him think about you all day long. Whether it’s a voice note, your thoughts or some saucy song lyrics, he’s going to be smiling and having a fantastic day at work.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

10. Compliments & Lots Of Touching

When you’re having a conversation casually brush your hand against his. Make him feel wanted without going all out. Play with his hair and gently stroke his thighs and nudge your legs over his. He’s going to get the hint alright!

11. Catch Him Off Guard!

He could be driving you to work or visiting you at home, that’s when you should full advantage of the situation. Lock lips when he least expects or randomly graze his package! Sure, he’s going to feel surprised. But that’s the whole point!

If you’re sure men are turned off by your trackie bottoms or make-up-free-face, think again

How to look hot for your boyfriend

  • 14:00, 21 Dec 2018
  • Updated 10:31, 28 Dec 2018

Sometimes it’s the simplest of things that create that spark, from using your wits to using the natural look.

Some of these may feel obvious, but we’ve gathered together expert top tips and advice when it comes to men finding women sexy.

There’s a few that mean sometimes less is more, while others may sound like the worst idea ever, but actually make perfect sense.

No Make-up

Apparently women spend more than £180,000 in a lifetime on beauty products, but Relate counsellor Mo Kurimbokus says we don’t need to: “When a woman doesn’t wear make-up, her natural beauty is on display.

“Also, some men find it a huge turn-off to kiss a woman and find that they are smeared with lipstick. Make-up can sometimes act as a barrier rather than a come-on.”

Smudged make-up

This is something that happens when we forget to take our make-up off after a night out. Surprisingly, as Paula explains: “Men find this sexy because you look like you’ve just made love. It reminds them of how great the afterglow of sex feels.”

Rounded stomachs

We’ve all craved abs like Geri Halliwell’s but men actually find a potbelly attractive. Mo says: “Men like women to feel soft and curvy, so a little potbelly can be a turn-on and give a woman that natural look. “If she’s not ‘perfect’, then he doesn’t feel he has to be either.”

Stretch marks

Those silvery lines are the bane of most women’s lives but some men actually like them! Mo explains: “What really does it for a man is a woman who is natural. “Stretch marks remind a man of the child they created together and her commitment to him. It is also an intimate detail of a woman’s body that only he is privy to.”

Muffin top

You might think skinny jeans are impossible to wear without getting that tell-tale roll of flab over the waistband. But, according to Paula, men think a little muffin top is cute.

“The curvy shape is synonymous with fertility so the soft fleshiness is tapping directly into his unconscious evolutionary desires.”

Phoning or texting him when you’re drunk

After a night out with the girls, a phone call to confess how much you miss him seems like a good idea at the time. But Simon Moore, Academic Leader in Psychology at London Metropolitan University, says: “Letting people know how you feel is both reassuring and attractive. We all like compliments.” Just be careful with what you’re messaging!

Drinking Pints

Gone are the days when your man orders a pint, with “a half for the lady”. Simon says: “Drinking what you want and not caring what people think show that you are confident with yourself and the choices you make in life.”

Small Boobs

It’s not all about glamour models for some men. Simon says: “Small breasts are usually pert and this is an indication of youth and physical health. Men are more wired to seek signs of youth and vitality, indicators that she could bear children.”

Mismatching underwear

Most women save the lacy stuff for special occasions and opt for comfort. Relationship psychotherapist Paula Hall explains: “Men love catching you in mismatching underwear because it looks like you weren’t planning on having sex, but they’ve managed to persuade you.”

Walking home from a club in bare feet

Heels look fabulous, but won’t feel it after dancing. Psychologist Ingrid Collins says: “Bare feet have a hint of nudity. Walking barefoot suggests naturalness and a rebel against convention, and can clue a man in to fantasies of wildness.”

Grown out highlights

The upkeep on highlights can be huge, but maybe you shouldn’t bother. Paula explains: “Like women, men also like a bit of rough. The unkempt roots probably remind him of the girls his mum said he should avoid – which makes them doubly attractive.”

Getting the punchline of a joke wrong

We’ve all been there, sitting in the pub, everyone listening intently as you run through the latest joke you heard at the office – until you forget the ending. Mo says: “Men can be intimidated by intellectual women, so getting it wrong makes her far less intimidating and they can relax in her company. It shows vulnerability and triggers his protective instinct.”


“Wrinkles bother women more than they do men, as they feel it often spells a loss of youth,” Mo says. “Wrinkles can spell experience, which can trigger thoughts of them having great sex together – a huge turn-on for him.”

Wearing tracksuit bottoms and a baggy t-shirt to bed

When we pass a certain point in our relationship, going to bed in saucy nightwear is replaced with a need for comfort. Ingrid says: “Very casual clothes suggest the woman is relaxed and confident about herself, and a man can find this very sexy.”

Women who are good with kids

If you reckon your man is rolling his eyes as you play with nieces and nephews, think again. Mo explains: “It gives him visual evidence that she is patient and caring, and reminds him of his mother’s unconditional love.”

What the guys say

Christopher Nelson, 28, a claims adjuster from Wales, says: “I think it’s really sexy when a girl is good at banter and can give back as good as she gets.”

Andrew Widdowson, 27, a plasterer from Sheffield, says: “Bed hair is so sexy. My girlfriend looks great with it, and it reminds me of the amazing night we had before!”

Andrew Wellwood, 29, a salesman from Yorkshire, says: “I love those dimples on a girl’s back just above her bum. When they lean over and I can see them, it conjures up saucy images in my head.”

Mark Spence, 30, a writer from Belfast, says: “I think the sexiest part of my girl’s body is her neck, it looks really stroke-able. There’s nothing nicer or sweeter than nuzzling into your girlfriend’s neck.”

James Village, 27, a businessman from Manchester, says: “Girls who play with the hair at the back of their head are a real turn-on. It reveals their neck, which is a really sexy place on a woman.”

Gareth Carter, 35, an IT specialist from Preston, says: “I’m into racing and love the way my girlfriend comes with me, though she’s not interested. And all without moaning – unlike me when I go shopping with her.”

How to look hot for your boyfriend

After all, a potential mate’s attractiveness ranks as one of the top traits of interest to the opposite sex. In addition, research suggests that more attractive individuals might actually earn more in the long term.

Fortunately for you, even if you weren’t as lucky in the genetic lottery as Brad Pitt, there are a number of tactics you can avail yourself of in the service of making the most of what you were given. Here we list our top 10 tips to help you look like the best version of yourself — and increase your share of life’s treasures.

1) Pluck unwanted hair

Nose hair, ear hair or scraggly hair that’s poking out anywhere else on your face isn’t sexy. Get rid of excess hair in these areas by using tweezers. Grasp each strand firmly and pull in the direction of the hair growth. Once a week, check your face for new hairs that might have popped up. If you have unruly eyebrows or a unibrow, consider getting your brows professionally waxed or shaped — it doesn’t cost much, and this way you won’t end up with any grooming accidents.

2) Exercise before you go out

When you’ve got a big night out planned and you want to look your best for it, sneak in a sweat session a couple of hours before your event. Ideally, you should mix cardio with weight-bearing exercises, concentrating on doing reps that engage your major muscle groups (particularly if you’re short on time), as this technique will make your muscles look ultra-toned for several hours. Plus, exercising will boost your confidence and give your skin a healthy glow.

3) Practice good posture

By standing up straight, you’ll automatically look leaner, with more defined musculature. You’ll also project more confidence, an attribute that most people find very appealing. When you’re standing up properly, your weight should rest more on your toes than your heels, your abs should be taut and pulled toward your belly, and your shoulders should be rolled back.

4) Take care of your mouth

Brush your teeth regularly with whitening toothpaste , floss every night and whiten your teeth with a home kit twice a year. Everyone finds a healthy set of teeth and gums attractive, and not taking care of your mouth can be downright repulsive. Go one step further and get soft lips by running your toothbrush lightly over them to slough off dead skin. Then, in the morning, apply a non-noticeable lip chap and switch to a heavy-duty, super-intensive healing balm before bed.

5) Invest in skin care

To ensure that the products you buy will work for you, figure out your skin type. Men with oily or acne-prone skin will benefit from a facial wash containing a 2% salicylic acid concentration, while guys with dry skin should seek out a cleanser with a creamy texture. Your skin-care arsenal should also include a hydrating moisturizer, an eye cream to reduce any signs of aging, sunscreen to protect against the damaging effects of UV rays, and an exfoliator to make your skin brighter and help unclog pores by getting rid of debris and dead cells.

6) Match your face to your hair and facial hair

A haircut and facial hair style that are based on your face shape can make a monumental difference in your appearance. A square-shaped face, for example, suits most short- to medium-length haircuts and can take on a variety of facial hair styles. Talk to your barber about employing tricks like a longer front to conceal a high forehead or strategically growing facial hair to render a soft jaw line or a small chin less noticeable. Whatever combo of hair and facial hair you settle on, always take pride in grooming. That means maintaining healthy hair with regular cuts, changing your razor blade often, investing in shaving cream, and making sure your facial hair has sharply defined edges.

7) Cultivate a classic wardrobe

There are two reasons timeless pieces are the backbone of any stylish man’s wardrobe: 1) Assembling a collection of basics — including a navy suit or blazer, white dress shirts, dark denim, easy-to-layer tees, neutral-colored cardigans, and an all-purpose trench — means that you’ll always appear effortlessly elegant, and, 2) By adding trendy items to an otherwise classic ensemble, you instantly freshen up your look and come off as having an amazing sense of style.

8) Wear clothes that fit

You can shell out for all the upscale designer wool suits and cashmere sweaters you want, but if your clothes don’t fit you properly, you’ll seem like you have more money than style. The biggest mistake men make when it comes to ill-fitting clothing is to favor baggy apparel over more body-conscious designs. Even if you’re on the heavyset side, clothing that holds close to your body (but isn’t skin -tight) is the most flattering.

9) Know your flaws

Taking an honest assessment of your body and face can go a long way toward helping you make the most of your appearance. When you know your weak points, you’ll be able to minimize them or conceal them to your advantage. For example, some clever work on your barber’s part can take the focus off a receding hairline. Additionally, accepting your spare tire means you can get rid of pieces that add bulk, such as double blazers, and start shopping for clothes that create the illusion of a more V-shaped physique, like two-button blazers in lightweight fabrics.

10) Eat and drink right

Make a concerted effort to eat right and you’ll have won half the battle in looking your personal best. Your body is like a machine, and refueling that machine with high-quality fuel will profoundly affect how efficiently it runs in addition to how much fat you store, the clarity of your skin, and the strength of your hair and nails. There’s no magic to it: Just make sure you include plenty of lean protein in your diet from poultry and fish, fill up your plate with green veggies, and favor antioxidant -filled fruit for dessert. Finally, hydrate properly by consuming eight glasses of water daily.

It is difficult to keep your relationship interesting after years of being together. Here are some tips to reignite the spark and attract your man once again.

It is all butterflies-in-your-stomach romantic at the beginning of the relationship, but over time the romantic energy and sexual tension wear down. This is something that almost every couple faces somewhere down the line and it can easily be fixed. Reigniting the spark in your relationship isn’t as challenging as you might think. All you need to do is make a little effort.

If you’re someone looking to be more attractive to your man, this article is for you . There is nothing wrong with trying to be more attractive for the person you love. In fact, it is a beautiful intention to let the relationship be more exciting. But one thing to keep in mind, men think differently than women so flowers aren’t going to cut it.

Here are some simple ways to be more attractive to the man in your life:

Be knowledgeable

Nobody likes a dimwit! And knowledge is something you can acquire by being more aware and by reading. A well-read woman who can hold a discussion and keep it going surely attracts a man. A woman’s beauty combined with intelligence is something a man can’t resist.

Take initiative

Remember the time when you two were flirtatious? Bring that back to the relationship. Be the one to initiate intimacy to show him that you care. This is more about keeping your man than attracting him.

Take care of yourself

You don’t have to look glam-ready all the time. All you need to do is keep in mind that hygiene and health are important for everyone in a relationship. Being hygienic and fit shows that you take care of yourself and it will help you feel confident. And that confidence will definitely attract your man.

Give him some space

Let him hang out with his friends. If you never give him his time, you might come off as too controlling. So, tell him to have fun and enjoy the day with friends. Thinking how this will help? Well, you m an will definitely come back to you thinking how understanding and considerate you are.

Compliment him

Men might not be big f ans of compliments, but they wouldn’t mind one once in a while . Give him a genuine compliment to let him know he is appreciated. Praise him for things he is least confident about and the things that are central to his identity. Just make sure whatever compliment you give him, it has to come straight from the heart.

Be more expressive

Regardless of how long you guys have been together, your man might not always know what’s going on in your head. So, express your love to show how much you value him. Talk to him when you want something, especi ally when it comes to things to do in bed .

Show interest in his interests

The effort is all that counts. Showing interest in something they like is a great way of showing them you care and value them. Not only will make him more attracted to you, but it will also help you guys build a stronger bond.

Be spontaneous

It is easy for the hustle and bustle of life to take a toll on your love life. You might get so busy that you don’t even understand when the relationship went south. One of the most common causes is that your relationship has become boring.

Solution – Be spontaneous! When your man sees how you are making an effort to be more spontaneous , he will respond with even more excitement. The next time he thinks of you, he knows that you guys will have a good time together.

Show him your fun side

Sense of humour is an important aspect of intellectual compatibility. It will give you a common ground to connect and make it easier for him to make silly jokes around you. After all, humour makes awkward situations less awkward. Plus, it is gre at to be able to share jokes after years of being together.

Why men like sports. Why they like to watch sport while having sex. Why they’ll commit to some women and not others. Why they’re so obsessed with man food. Why they get moody. Why they perve on other women so discernibly … even if they’re sitting opposite the hottest woman in the room. Why they don’t like to talk about their feelings. Why they don’t like it when you talk about your feelings. The list goes on … but the theme is always the same: why are men so difficult to understand?

OK, we know what the men are about to say: “But we are straightforward creatures with one thing on our mind – our freedom. Don’t mess with it!”

What women don’t know about men (but should!)

But that’s not enough. Questions still abound. And while here at Ask Sam headquarters we endeavour to give you a platform to answer these questions (and debate those answers), there are some things I’ve recently learnt about men that go against everything women once thought about how men think and behave.

So herein lie my top four things that men don’t really give a toss about. And in case you think I’m lying … you can ask them yourselves.

How you look naked

There’s a brilliant line in the book (or the movie – whatever you fancy) Eat, Pray, Love, in which the protagonist Elizabeth Gilbert (played by Julia Roberts in the Hollywood version), is swanning about Italy eating and drinking to her heart’s content.

Her friend turns to her and says she can’t eat another thing for fear she’s already put on too much weight to which Elizabeth (Julia), turns to her, and says, “In all the years that you have undressed in front of a gentleman, has he ever asked you to leave? Has he ever walked out and left? No? It’s because he doesn’t care! He’s in a room with a naked girl – he’s just won the lottery!”

Sure, no one wants to date someone (of either sex) who’s let themselves go to the point of no return, but a few kilos here and there are nothing to stress over when it comes to nabbing a man. As Julia Roberts protests, if your skinny jeans don’t fit, just get new jeans.

How much make-up youre wearing

On a balmy hot afternoon the other day, after a long day at the beach, men in board shorts and women in bikinis swarmed to a nearby popular nightspot. The women stood in line for the bathroom in droves, waiting to reapply their eyeliner, check their cleavage and swap their sandals for stilettos.

The men just came straight into the bar, sat down and ordered a drink. None of the blokes really cared about how they looked nor whether they sported a crop of sea hair or not.

“Do you really think men care all that much about whether you’re wearing lip gloss or not?” one man told a woman who seemed to be reapplying it with vigour.

Well, he had a point.

I’m often asked by women how to dress for a date; what colour lipstick to wear and which heels I reckon might be more suitable to nabbing the man of their dreams than others.

But here’s the truth: look around the room at the women who get the men. Are they the ones in luminous red lipstick with super-coiffed, slick hair-dos and skirts so short, teamed with wedges so high you wonder how they’ll even get to the end of the room let alone be able to go up to a man and ask for his number?

Men have articulated time and time again that it’s the woman who can pull off jeans and a T-shirt with flat shoes and silky natural hair that makes them look twice …

Hairless isnt always the way to go

Many times I’ve heard men say they don’t really care if a woman forgets to shave her legs or wax her bush, or if she isn’t sporting a spray tan. (Especially if she’s naked.)

Of course basic grooming is imperative. And of course there are preferences. And of course there are rules when it comes to a woman looking after herself. After all, no man likes to get into bed with a woman resembling a character from a Tarzan movie. But he also doesn’t want to see what he deems “a high maintenance woman” either.

The amount of money you make

A friend who moved to Los Angeles and back to “find herself” and then found herself back with the man she started with, told it to me like this: “When your man doesn’t care when you lose weight, put on weight, make money or don’t make money – when he doesn’t judge you for not wearing the latest designer dresses or whether your hair is blow-dried straight or not – and when you can finally appreciate that person for who they are and you know they love you for you … that’s when you know.”

I think it also comes down to self-acceptance. It’s the insouciant women who get the guy …

What men do care about

There are certain things men do care about: a woman in a bar without a bra; when you’re not wearing any underwear, sport tattoos (depending on the bloke), smoke, drink too much or tell them you want a relationship after one date.

In fact just the other day, I saw a man talking to his mates about his choice between two women. One was immaculately dressed, perfectly coiffed, preened and groomed to an inch of her life.

After one night with this man, she turned to a mutual friend and told her to stay away from him. “He’s my boyfriend!” she exclaimed. The man was shocked.

The next girl slept with him just as quickly, but she didn’t flinch after they did the horizontal hanky panky. She didn’t ask him for a commitment or whether he was seeing other girls. She didn’t give a toss. And after a few months of dating and a proposal, she was the one who won out in the end .

Oh, and in case you’re wondering why your man is moody?

“It’s quite often our way of saying we just want a big chicken schnitzel . ” says one man.

PS. My email is bogged down with your awesome responses, but I promise you I do read them all. so you can email me here and I’ll try my best .

PPS. My new book The Catch is now in stores! I’ve asked my publisher as a favour to give ASK SAM readers a special discount. So click here, type “CATCH30” when you check out on the right hand side and you’ll get 30% off your copy.

How to look hot for your boyfriend


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If she’s hot and you’re well, bothered, the chances of being badly affected when your girl is hit on are pretty high. Especially if other guys feel that they are more in her “league” than you. But before you let the green-eyed monster rear its ugly head, take a look at how we suggest you handle dating a hottie:

Be happy

Other men giving her attention can get tiring — very tiring, very fast. But instead of cursing your luck and sulking every time someone glances at her, appreciate what you’ve got. You’re the envy of other men even though it may not feel so at the time. However, just because other men may envy you, you do not have bragging rights — your girl is not a trophy. Keep it classy, always.

Let her be herself

Attractive women mostly know the effect they have on men and your girl is no stranger to the attention. She got it before you arrived on the scene and will continue to get it if and when you are out of the picture. So really, please do not ask her to tone down her behaviour, dressing or charm, because the only thing she will turn down is you. Let her be, she can handle the situation.

Keep paying attention

Women love flattery and attention. Whether it’s for her looks, intellect, job or home life, she’s going to dig the compliments. If she’s getting it from other men, let her enjoy it so long as it doesn’t go over the top. But just because she likes the attention from other people, doesn’t mean she likes yours any less. Stay in the game and keep being attentive to her.

She’s hot, but there’s more

Yeah, she knows she’s hot. But there is so much more to her than just her looks. So make it a point to compliment her on her other assets. The more creative and specific the compliment, the more she’s going to realise why she picked you instead of the other men who were vying for her.

Discuss the issue

If the flirting, attention and compliments are getting too much to handle, then have a frank discussion with your lady. Remember, it’s not her fault that she gets hit on, so don’t accuse her. Be open about what makes you uncomfortable and she’s a lot more likely to reassure you.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

Body issues affect all of us.

Frequently, I get messages from people — usually cis men who are dating cis women, but not always — asking me what the hell they’re supposed to do when their partner talks negatively about their own body.

“She’s unhappily gained weight since we’ve been together, and I know saying ‘I still think you’re beautiful’ confirms the idea that fat is bad,” they say.

“My boyfriend is shy about not being bigger muscularly, but how can I reassure him that that’s exactly my type without confirming his insecurities?” they say.

“I don’t know how to respond when they talk about needing to go on a diet,” they say.

As a woman in eating disorder recovery who still harbors body issues, I can imagine how difficult it is for partners to know what the right thing to say is.

So while I certainly can’t speak for your partner and their needs, what I can do is give you some ideas that you can mix and match depending on your situation. So let’s start there.

Like I said: I can’t speak for them. And unless I’m your partner (and babe, if you’re reading this, hi!), I have no idea what will feel best for them.

And it doesn’t have to be an awkward conversation like “Hey sweetie! How do you want me to talk about your body when you hate it?”

It can be as simple as taking some time — when your partner is in a good space, by the way, and not hyperfocused on body negativity — to say, “I want to check in about how you’d like me to respond when you’re struggling with your body image. What would be helpful to say? And what would be harmful? I care about you, and I want to support you; I just need a little help.”

Communication goes a long, long way.

2. Validate Their Experience

When your partner is unhappy or feeling down, they’re unhappy and feeling down. And no amount of “No you’re not!” or “You’re beautiful!” is going to make that go away.

And affirming their feelings and validating their experiences is really important.

The thing about body image is that it’s a psychological relationship to one’s understanding of one’s body. It’s not really about what’s “real” and what’s not; it’s wrapped up in perspective and emotion.

Rushing to suggest that they change their mind — “No, babe, I love your body!” — doesn’t acknowledge that they’re in a difficult emotional place.

Try “I understand where you’re coming from, and [reality]” or “I hear what you’re saying, and [reality]” instead. That way, you allow space for their feelings, while also reminding them of what’s objectively true.

The evocation of reality can be anything from “fat isn’t a bad thing, but you also just so happen not to be fat” to “your body isn’t all that you are.”

Just remember to use “and” and not “but” — because that implies that there are two truths that are connected, rather than implying that your partner’s experience is false and that your assertion is correct.

3. Focus Attention Away From Their Body

Living in our society — and especially when we’re women — we’re forced not only to constantly define ourselves based on our physical appearance, but to prioritize that over our other dimensions.

And that’s actually the root of all of our body image problems.

So try to focus attention away from your partner’s body entirely. Because when you zero in on their body — even if you’re telling them how amazing it is — you might exacerbate the problem, leading them to stay focused on exactly what’s stressing them out.

So, why is your partner awesome outside of their body? Are they smart, funny, thoughtful? Give some lip service to those attributes, and that might help your partner stop fixating on their body so much.

4. Compliment Parts of Their Body That You Know They Don’t Like

OK. I know this one completely contradicts the last suggestion, but different things are going to work for different people — or sometimes a little bit of both can help someone shift their perspective on their body. So give them a heads up that what they see as insecurities, you see as sexy as hell.

For example, pretty much the only part of my body that I don’t like is my stomach. Everything else, I more or less always like or am comfortable with. But my midsection? Blah. I usually struggle with it.

And I don’t think I’ve ever had a partner say, “I like your stomach. It’s cute.” And, I mean, in reality, what does a “cute” stomach even look like? So I don’t blame them for not thinking about my stomach when they can think about my ass or thighs (both of which are awesome, PS). But when no one ever compliments the one thing that I hate, that kind of confirms in my head that it sucks.

And is that unfair? Sure. But negative body image isn’t exactly known for being a rational beast.

So just letting your partner know that you like the things about them that they don’t can be a little boost.

5. Remind Them of Exactly Why You Love Their Body

Admit it: As attractive as your partner’s body might be to you, it isn’t necessarily any quote-unquote “better” or “worse” than any of your other partners’. Because the biggest reason why you love your partner’s — and why you’ve loved your former partners’ bodies — is that it belongs to them.

And I think one of the nicest things someone can say about their partner’s body is just that: “I love your body because it’s yours, and I love you.”

Those words can go a long way in reminding us that the idea of “beauty” is entirely subjective, and that a few pounds’ difference either way or stretch marks or small breasts or whatever-the-fuck mean nothing in the long run.

Because I can already tell that you’re a good partner. The fact that you’re asking about this and reading this article proves that. So remind your partner that they’re a good partner, too — exactly what you need and want and love, body and all.

This is it! It’s time to be ready for this year. Are you with me? If so, then today’s topic is how to make your boyfriend jeans look insanely hot next year. There are plenty of different ways how to make boyfriends look chic and voguish in real life. This trend seems like to be going strong this year. Style experts say boyfriends are gonna stay in fashion for a quite long time, so we better buy new styles to create fabulous outfits. Of course, these bottoms are considered to be a casual garment, so the best way is to dress them down for a streetwear inspired look. But you can dress them up for a more polished take on this trend. Anyway, keep on scrolling to find out best styling tips to wear boyfriends in your everyday life, as seen on the streets.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

Make a move with light denim bottoms and sexy black leather jacket. The faded boyfriends look pretty cool styled with a slouchy top and leather biker-inspired black jacket. You can complete the outfit by adding oversized sunglasses and functional Converse sneakers. If you are one of those ladies who like vintage fashion, then the best way to create your fabulous outfit is to try double denim look. Try on slouchy bottoms with cuffed bottoms and pair them with classy chambray shirt. You can complete this everyday style by adding tailored coat, ladylike necklace, pointed white pumps and quilted dark blue leather handbag. I do like this outfit for its fashion-forward vibe. Make things simple and sweet by wearing simple white T-shirt half-tucked in ripped boyfriends. Complete the look by adding cuffed black leather flat sandals and golden chain shoulder clutch. If it’s a chilly weather outside, then the best way is to wear boyfriends with striped T-shirt, furry jacket, ribbed knit beanie and glossy burgundy brogues. There is kind of menswear-inspired touch in this urban outfit. If you do want to fresh up your street look, then go for pastel colored denim bottoms and pair them with simple white tank top. Those of you who do wear grunge looks might like to try on 1990 inspired outfit. Here we see lady wearing cool black beanie, slouchy black leather jacket, striped top and cuffed boyfriends teamed with mannish flat Dr. Martens shoes. Some girls want their boyfriends look more girlish. You can try them on with pink accent garments and accessories. Another great way to make them look ladylike is to pair your floral shirt with cuffed jeans and complete the outfit by adding fuchsia pink shoulder satchel bag. The mid wash boyfriends can be paired with 1970’s inspired sleeveless polka dot blouse, so you look smart-casual. If you are one of those ladies who wants to look more professional wearing casual jean bottoms, then you might like to try on white button-down shirt and black blazer, so you can achieve that special workwear-inspired look. Hope these examples inspired you to buy new boyfriend jeans. Anyway, let me know your thoughts in the comments below.

. and why that’s a very good thing.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

Have you ever had a friend tell you about a gorgeous person they started seeing, only to meet the new partner in person and be thoroughly underwhelmed? Chalk it up to one of my favorite findings on how beauty plays out in romantic relationships: positive illusions.

Positive illusions—an inflated, unfounded optimism, particularly around one’s own circumstances and abilities—exist well beyond the romantic arena. They’re why most of us think we’re better-than-average drivers, why we gamble at casinos even when we know the odds are stacked against us, and why we’re pretty sure our kid is smarter than yours. But when this mental sleight of hand enters the realm of intimacy, it becomes downright beautiful. When we’re enamored with someone, we truly see them as being different than they really are—more physically appealing, for sure, but also more likable, more charming, more interesting, just plain better than most other people find them to be. But it’s not merely the byproduct of attraction—these illusions only fully come into play once we’ve established a relationship.

Here are five things to know about those rose-colored glasses through which you’ve been looking at your partner:

  1. Positive illusions can make you feel—and stay—in love. People who have strong positive illusions report higher relationship satisfaction—and why wouldn’t they? Look at the winner they snagged! And, again, it’s not just about puppy love: A 13-year longitudinal study showed that people who had strong positive illusions as newlyweds reported staying in love for longer, and more deeply, than people whose vision was clearer at the start of the relationship. And the stronger the illusion at the beginning of a relationship, the longer the relationship is likely to last. The main hitch is that if your illusions verge on grandiosity, the inevitable reality check might be hard enough to shatter your illusions. Better to keep those glasses tinted a mere rose, not scarlet.
  2. Positive illusions might mean you’re more committed to your partner. Researchers theorize that part of the reason we embrace positive illusions is because they carry us through inevitable periods of doubt in a relationship. It’s a way of protecting the commitment inherent in a partnership. But there’s a bit of a snag: Women tend to use positive illusions regardless of how committed they are to a relationship, while men tend to hold off on embracing them until they’re totally committed. (It’s unclear whether the gender divide applies to people in same-sex relationships, though people all over the Kinsey scale engage in positive illusions .)
  3. Positive illusions mean you can relax a little. You can quit sucking in your gut. Positive illusions give all of us a built-in safety net: If your partner thinks you’re better-looking than you actually are, you’ll have to actively become more unattractive before the illusion begins to crumble. For straight people, there’s also the added dimension of misunderstanding what the opposite sex generally finds appealing—women tend to think men prefer women to be thinner and bustier than men actually do, and men seem to believe that women swoon for a form more muscular than most women actually want. This disconnect doesn’t go away for people in committed relationships. Between this miscalculation and positive illusions, your imperfect form may be exactly what the love doctor ordered. Trust your beloved when he or she says you’re beautiful: Chances are, they mean it.
  4. Positive illusions don’t ever really go away. People tend to report their current partner as being better-looking than their former partners—but they still inflate their former sweetheart’s attractiveness too . And unsurprisingly, your rose-colored glasses stay firmly affixed when reflecting on that hot fling you had way back when because we tend to connect the beauty of our former lovers with the amount of passion a relationship had.
  5. . unless you were dumped. People who assigned blame for the end of a relationship to themselves, or to mutual agreement, continued to rate exes as improbably attractive . But people who were unceremoniously dumped hold a bit of a grudge by mentally diminishing the heat of their former flame. So while you’re still fondly reminiscing about your college boyfriend’s dreamy eyes—what a pity you had to let him go!—know that in his mind, you’re not looking so good.

How to look hot for your boyfriend

It’s pretty annoying, to say the least, when magazines try to make women feel like they should tailor their bodies, language, or wardrobes to suit a man’s preferences, let alone when the ideas they offer are based on what the fashion industry wants you to buy rather than on what guys actually love seeing you wear.

Articles telling you that guys standing around wagging their tongues over whatever the latest trend happens to be are just profiting off the idea that getting you to feel like you aren’t good enough to be loved as you are and in whatever outfits make you feel most comfortable will sell both magazines and clothes.

We firmly believe that men and women alike should wear whatever makes them look and feel their best.

But at the same time, if what makes you feel your best is choosing outfits you know will make a man you love or have your eye on want you — hey, you go, girl.

What should you wear today, tomorrow, or any time at all if you want to make him want you?

In an attempt to get to the real truth about what men want to see women wear vs. what the fashion industry wants us to spend money on, we asked a diverse group of men to tell us about the most amazing, beautiful, enticing thing they’d ever seen a woman wear in real life.

Their answers were both comforting and illuminating and prove that, most of the time, all you need to do is wear what makes you feel good.

If you’re wondering what to wear, here are 11 simple outfit ideas based on what guys say is mostly likely to make him want you bad.

1. Anything that exposes your lower back

“She had a sarong tied around her neck, covering up her front, but it gaped open in the back, showing off everything from her shoulders down to her . I don’t know what to call it. Butt cleavage? It was mesmerizing but so casually glamorous. I was unable to think clearly the whole time she was around, even when she was 40 feet away.”

2. His old t-shirt

“I actually realized I was in love with a girl just because she was standing in my bathroom wearing one of my beat-up, old t-shirts and nothing else.”

3. A pair of jeans that fit you just right

“This sounds boring, but when my girlfriend showed up to our second date in jeans, it was a serious turn-on. I’d only seen her really dressed up in skirts, but the jeans seemed like I’d made it to the next level where we could be comfortable together. Like she was okay to get a little dirty and was down for whatever. And her butt looked great in them.”

4. A sweater dress

“I turn into a full-on creep around a girl in a sweater dress. I just wanna touch it and cuddle with her and it looks so soft and warm and filled with curves. This one girl in my office wore one with boots that came up past her knees and there were maybe three inches of visible thigh skin between the boots and the bottom of the skirt, and I just about went insane. That was a rough day for my focus.”

5. A wedding dress

“The dress looked amazing, sure, but it was when I saw her that it hit me: We’re really doing this. She’s promising me her forever. This gorgeous woman is dressed like this to get married to me! How did this happen? I was overcome with emotion, to say the least. Yeah, I was ‘that guy’ who was bawling all the sudden.”

Yeah, you may not want to break your wedding dress out of the box and you definitely don’t want to buy one if you two aren’t married (yet), but a wimple white sundress never ever goes out of style.

6. Fire poi

“The most enticing look I’ve ever seen would definitely be nothing but a set of fire poi. One of my fire-spinning friends stripped and went and spun fire in ankle deep water at sunrise last time we all went camping. It was one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen.”

OK, we get this one may not be practical or even possible, but a cute tee decorated with flames could certainly do the trick.

7. An oversized sweatshirt or hoodie

“My girl wore one the other day and looked cuter than a box of puppies.”

8. A classic little black dress

“We had an office holiday party and one of our coworkers showed up in a simple black dress and blew everyone’s mind. She looked really great in it, but here’s the thing: It was just a plain, black dress made out of like . t-shirt material. It wasn’t even clingy or super-short or anything. But she’s always showed up to work in really utilitarian-style clothes that we all were amazed she even had a dress in her closet. It was nice to see she had another side.”

How to look hot for your boyfriendPhoto: ESB Professional / shutterstock

9. A one-piece bathing suit

“My wife had been so self-aware for months and months after we’d had our son, even though I kept telling her she was beautiful to me. We were at the beach almost a year later, and she put on a bathing suit and it made me so happy to see — not because her body was bangin’ or whatever, but because she looked so relaxed and okay with herself again. It was a nice enough one-piece that she’d had for years, but that day it felt special. She just seemed so happy in her body again and it was beautiful.”

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10. Tops or blouses that expose your shoulders and collarbone

“Not the shirts with the holes cut out of the shoulders, but the ones where the neck part looks like it’s stretched out and shows off the shoulders and the collarbone . whatever those are called. Those are just gorgeous. This girl I have a crush on was wearing one next to me last week and I was so awkward around her even though we’ve been cool for forever now.”

How to look hot for your boyfriendPhoto: Ranta Images / Shutterstock

11. Boho chic, or whatever your version of “goddess” attire might be

“I saw this goddess at a festival once wearing a strappy bodysuit thingie that was sort of industrial and goth (but I couldn’t see anything and I wanted to), with no pants and this elaborate, black, horned headdress . and plain, black Chuck Taylors. It was amazing. I should’ve married her.”

How to look hot for your boyfriendPhoto: Zolotarevs / Shutterstock

12. A sleeveless, backless top

“I’m dating myself with this but the girl I lost my virginity to was wearing a shiny backless no-sleeve top, a pair of black pants with the zipper on the back, and high heels. Something about all of those things went together in an incredible way — it felt like she was almost showing off more of her body in that outfit than when we were naked. For some reason, this gave me a lifelong appreciation of side cleavage and I’ve gotten on board with the summertime trend of sleeveless tees slit down the side.”

How to look hot for your boyfriendPhoto: Hank Shiffman / Shutterstock