How to stop taking life too seriously

How to stop taking life too seriously

It is a fact, life can be stressful. Between the demands of work, relationships, family, social obligations, it’s not always easy. Getting caught up in all of our “problems” happens far too often. One of the issues many people face is that they take themselves too seriously, they take life too seriously. People tend to worry about what others think of them if they act a certain way, or do a certain thing when really, everyone should be doing whatever they want.

There are Boundaries We Must Oblige To…

But let us not get crazy and live our lives as if no one else exists around us. There is a level of respect that must be taken into consideration when we move about our lives. So of course there are certain societal norms and rules that people should follow.

For example, you can’t be walking around naked, do not steal, do not harm anyone else, and please do not take up two parking spaces when you park your car. Those are all things people should be taking seriously, but for the most part people need to chill.

Fear of Letting Go

In order to feel free, act free and be free, we must be able to let go of our insecurities and perceived judgments from those around us. Fear can be debilitating, it holds a person back from trying something new, from changing their life, or learning something new. Fear is what keeps people stagnant, keeps them from moving forward.

As stated earlier, people fear what others think, taking ourselves and our lives too seriously, which goes hand-in-hand with fear. Someone may be afraid to bust a move on the dance floor, in fear that they will be judged. In reality, no one cares what you’re doing on that dance floor, let loose and enjoy yourself!

Taking things too seriously, can suck the fun and adventure out of life, and life is far too short for that.

Gain Confidence in Letting Go

When facing a situation, you should ask yourself “what is the worst that could happen?” There are times when the risk could be greater than the reward, but if we let the fear of failing, or being embarrassed control our decisions, you are taking things too seriously. In order to loosen up, one must let go of their ego, set aside their “reputation” and become shame-resilient.

Maybe you are the kind of person who everyone expects to be the “tough guy” but you just had a loss in your family and “tough” is the last thing you’re feeling. Be vulnerable, let yourself feel all the feelings and realize that putting on that “serious” front, is not realistic or good for your health. No need to live up to anyone else’s idea of who you are, let go of that reputation and ego.

Free Yourself From Perceived Judgments

Taking life “too seriously” can mean many things. Maybe you are taking your job too seriously, your kickball league, your appearance, the home you live in, and the car you drive. Really, a person can take anything in life and take it “too seriously.”

Let’s say that a co-worker of yours just bought a new convertible, while you are still sharing the family car. You may feel ashamed, and embarrassed by your less exciting car, but why? Why does it matter what car you are driving, versus what your co-worker is driving. Does the car define your worth? Obviously not. You are taking your method of transportation way too seriously, it truly does not matter how you get from place to place.

The kickball league you decided to join with some friends has got you down, maybe the team has been on a losing streak- who cares? Group activities, such as team sports are made for FUN!

Say your friend just bought a house with a great yard, but you are living in a small studio; again it does not matter.

Or maybe your brother is the kind of guy who wears a new tailored suit every day to work, but you wear the same outfit twice a week, don’t take it seriously because nobody else cares.

Feel Free, Find Joy!

Comparison is the thief of joy and can cause a person to make changes that they would not necessarily have done on their own. Putting pressure on oneself to be a certain way is exhausting, and not good for your mental health. When taking life too seriously, just don’t.

How to Let Go

If you are someone who takes life too seriously and let us face it, most of us are, there are some ways you can work on letting go…

Try leaving work a little early even when you have some things left on your to-do list. Experiment with meditation, it may give you some sense of peace, and if nothing else, you are setting aside some YOU time. Make random appointments with friends or for yourself just as a way to step aside from logistical matters once in a while.

Creating time for yourself is just the beginning of allowing yourself to explore and reconnect with who you are. When you are able to do that, you will be able to find confidence in being free and not caring about what others think. In turn, this will allow you to let go of being so serious and timely and allow you to relax, find freedom and ultimately bring you joy.

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At Clarity Clinic, we have highly trained staff who specialize in psychotherapy and psychiatry services. To learn more about how we can support your mental health, call Clarity Clinic on (312) 815-9660 or schedule an appointment today.

How to stop taking life too seriously

Many people agonise over even the smallest decisions. They worry about daily interactions with people and the impressions they are making on others. And sometimes even wrestle with each word of a simple email.

“People tend the take everything too seriously. Especially themselves. Yep. And that’s probably what makes ’em scared and hurt so much of the time. Life is too serious to take that seriously, ” says Tom Robbins.

Sometimes seriousness happens when we see everything as evidence of our abilities, values, ethics. When in doubt, question if you’re trying to prove yourself.

Everyone has responsibilities and goals to achieve. There are probably countless things you must do and so many people depending on you.

Seriousness should be there as per the weight of the situation. You are the best judge to decide the weight of every problem or obstacle you have to overcome.

An overemphasis on seriousness in life lends itself to a narrow way of understanding what’s worth your time and attention. It can even make you less productive by making you so nervous about one thing in particular.

You are also likely to misjudge other people’s reaction if you are too serious about everything. A serious attitude makes it difficult to connect better with others. When you stop taking everything so seriously, you make more genuine connections that can have a positive influence on your life. A relaxed personality is not an indication that you are irresponsible.

The problem with taking ourselves too seriously is that we choose to look for approval — the fear of rejection prevent us from living our best lives. We allow people to become our judges.

Fear of ridicule makes us overthink everything. The need for worthiness — pleasing, performing, and perfecting consumes us.

When you wrongly convince yourself that the world is a stage, you become an actor who must perform to please. That mindset can make the rest of your life miserable. Living our lives as an endless performance is exhausting — we are always playing a part.

Often people who take things too seriously are perfectionists and can’t tolerate their imperfections and vulnerabilities.

Here is the thing, you start living when we aren’t excessively worrying and overly concerned with every potential “what if?” scenario. Stress and worry is not a responsible way to deal with life’s challenges.

Whilst you are busy worrying about everything you need to sort out, you miss out on enjoying the little things that matter. You miss out on the moments of significance that can make you happy and fulfilled in life. You miss out connecting with people on a deeper level.

Imagine a world where everyone took prioritised self-care and their own well-being first before stressing about everything wrong in their lives.

Here is the real truth — while things are nowhere near perfect — the sun still rise and fall every day. The sky isn’t falling. It isn’t. The evolution and transformation of everything around us will still continue when we are no more around to witness it.

You can probably see this in your own life. You are changing but you are too busy stressing about everything to notice or enjoy the process.

Get out of your own head. All that worry is worth your sanity. Try to stop taking everything so seriously and witness the difference that makes in your life. Go for whatever you have always wanted, but make sure to have fun in the process.

Build and improve your career, but don’t make your career your life. They two are not the same. By all means, plan your finances but don’t about every penny you spend on coffee. Spend time with family, friends and colleagues without worrying too much about what they think about you.

The truth is nobody is thinking about you or judging you as much as you are judging yourself.

Relax into the moment and enjoy life more

Sanity returns as you focus on what is at hand, give it your very best and keep moving. Appreciate your journey in life as much as the destination you seek. No one is perfect or has all the answers. I don’t. I make the most of every day.

Just live. Or even better — learn live to live a life looking forward to today’s opportunities.

Things can seem like a big deal from our little plot of existence. Everything happening in your life can come off as monumental. That can stress you out. When life becomes very serious, you stop living. Don’t drive yourself crazy with all the things you feel have to be done. Be conscious of what you tell yourself so you can start appreciating what you get to do.

Use simple questions to keep things in perspective. When you feel intense seriousness start to bubble up inside, ask yourself the following questions:

  • Is this worth getting upset over?
  • Is this really so important right now?
  • Is the situation really that bad beyond repair?
  • Is this my problem at all?

This can help you calm down, relax and focus on overcoming the obstacle or find a solution quickly and moving on. You don’t want to get stuck over anything significant.

You don’t have control over a lot of things as you think. There’s nothing you can control except right now, this moment and your availability to it.

End the vicious cycle by aligning yourself to the brighter, and lighter version of yourself. Add more humour to your life — surround yourself with funny people, turn off the news and watch a comedy instead. Be okay being vulnerable. Move from measurement to possibilities.

By learning how to spread some lightness into your life, you can stop being too serious and spend more time enjoying life.

No, things won’t always be easy. But this life is still so good — laugh, be cheerful, be open, be free. Smile, it’s free therapy. Just Live.

Originally published on Medium.

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How to stop taking life too seriously

Every day you are faced with a million little traps that encourage you to take your life way too seriously. The frustrations of 21 st century living come in many forms such as slow internet connections, people who drive at a snail’s pace, and choosing what to wear to an event with an ambiguous dress code. It is easy to get caught up in perpetual flow of decisions and events that make up our lives and to forget that most of the challenges we are faced with are only as stressful as we choose to let them be. Next time you are tempted to smash your computer or lash out in a fit of road rage, remember these reasons not to take life so seriously.

1. The world is ridiculous

Objectively speaking, civilization is ridiculous. Next time you are at a scenic overlook or an elementary school Christmas pageant, take a second to look around and count the number of people who are experiencing the beauty of nature or the adorable miscues through small LCD rectangles instead of with their own eyes. If that isn’t enough to convince you that our lives are ridiculous, consider the fact that it is customary for businessmen to tie a piece of cloth around their necks every day for no apparent reason, or that every suit they wear has a row of pointless buttons on the cuff. If you can stop and laugh at every day absurdities, you are two steps ahead of the game.

2. Relationships are all that matter

Time and time again when researchers have tried to figure out what makes people happy they have come to the same conclusion: personal relationships make the biggest difference. If we valued our happiness over money (as many of us claim to) we would do everything we could to spend time with friends and family and not worry so much about putting in extra time at work. When you look back on your life, you won’t reflect on the time you spent at work; you will remember family dinners, great vacations, romantic dinners, and your wedding. Prioritize people over your career.

3. Rich people aren’t happier people

Spending more time at home or with friends will probably have a negative impact on the balance of your bank account. Just reading that sentence probably sent a wave of panic through some of you, but consider the fact that wealth is not correlated with happiness. In fact, once you have enough money to satisfy your basic needs, money makes very little difference in your overall well-being. The only exceptions are if you give your extra money to charity or if it significantly boosts your social rank.

4. Worrying isn’t productive

Some of us even end up stressed out in situations where it is totally unwarranted. For example, you might find yourself visiting a new city like London or Paris and end up thoroughly confused by the transit system. You can’t find out how to get where you want to go and it makes you want to scream. But what are you accomplishing by stressing yourself out? Nothing. Take a step back and laugh at yourself. Go with the flow and end up where you end up. Getting lost in a new city will lead to a way better story than going to some stuffy museum anyway.

5. Your time is limited

If worrying is unproductive and money doesn’t make us happy, why do we waste so much time on those things? You only get to live one life. If you’re lucky enough to make it to age 90 you still have less than 800,000 hours between the time you are born and the time you die to cherish and enjoy all the things that make up life. One third of that time you won’t even be awake for, so you had best make the most of the remaining chunk. Do what you need to do to live a happy and fulfilled life, and forget what anyone else tells you.

6. You are a speck

Finally, if you need a reminder that your problems aren’t as big as they seem and you want to readjust your perspective, get out of the city and look at the stars. The universe is larger than you can imagine. It is filled with burning balls of gas, galaxies and solar systems beyond counting, and (in all likelihood) thousands of other civilizations fighting their own wars and facing their own challenges. In a very real sense, you are insignificant. What better reason could there be not to take your life to seriously? The only thing that really matters is enjoying your life as much as you can and helping other people do the same.

Here’s something crazy to consider: even when things in life are serious, they can generally be handled better by not taking them so seriously. Wild. That’s not to say that there aren’t difficult problems that arise and will test your strength and patience, but regardless of what you’re up against, you need to take a deep breath. It’s time to let go of our need to cling to the dramatic woe is me vibe and just lighten up a bit. Easier said than done, of course, but here are some tips.

Think about the worst case scenario.
How to stop taking life too seriously
No, really, usually it’s not as bad as you think. Say you’re stressing about making rent on time – the real worst case scenario is probably borrowing some money from the ‘rents, not getting kicked out onto the streets and losing your entire livelihood by the second of the month.

Smile more.
How to stop taking life too seriously
So cheesy, I know, but science has proven that smiling about nothing can boost your mood, so you might as well do it. Smile at yourself every time you look in the mirror if smiling at every stranger you pass is too much for you.

Look for the humor in the crappy stuff.
How to stop taking life too seriously
You can either get super angry that you’re stuck in traffic, or you can think about how bizarre it is that thousands of people around you are also just sitting there stuck in their cars and one lady even got out of her car to sunbathe on the roof of hers. It’s totally weird.

Be in the moment.
How to stop taking life too seriously
Don’t let tomorrow’s to-do list take over your brain during your happy hour gathering today. Fun things are supposed to be fun.

Get stuff done.
How to stop taking life too seriously
How much time do we spend worrying about things that we can actually handle? Pay your bills, call your dad back, take your vitamins, and start that work project today instead of the night before it’s due. Once it’s done, there’s no way you can worry about it.

Don’t take on other people’s problems.
How to stop taking life too seriously
Be there for your friends, of course, but don’t internalize their stress. They come to you because they need a sounding board and some solid ground, not another stress case.

Stop watching the news.
How to stop taking life too seriously
Or stop watching it so closely, anyway. Of course there’s stuff you need to know about the world, but the most recent real-life horror story five states over might not be one of them.

Keep your perspective.
How to stop taking life too seriously
Your maid of honor duties might be driving you crazy, but think a little broader here – your friend has been waiting for this celebration of love her entire life and you’ve been asked to be one the most important people in it. That’s a good thing!

Give up perfectionism.
How to stop taking life too seriously
That pound you gained this week is 100 percent not visible to anyone else, and even if it was, it’s not their business. When you ease up on the ridiculous amounts of pressure you put on yourself, you might find that you naturally do your best at everything, anyway.

Spend some time outside.
How to stop taking life too seriously
There’s nothing like being awed by nature to realize that you’re not the center of the universe or anywhere close to it.

Take care of your body.
How to stop taking life too seriously
Anxiety flourishes in inflamed, overfed, under-slept, overworked bodies. Turn around unhealthy habits one by one and notice how things magically start to get easier.

Stop trying to please everyone.
How to stop taking life too seriously
It’s literally (literally) impossible to please everyone, so don’t even start. If you’re being a nice person and doing your personal best as much as you can, that’s pretty much all that you can do.

Reflect on where you’ve come from.
How to stop taking life too seriously
Many of the things you have today were merely your dreams at one point, so let that sink in for a minute before you go cursing the injustices of the world. To your 13-year-old self, you’re a huge success.

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Somewhere, in the archives of Facebook, exists a photo of a fun-loving teenager in her last few days of her senior year of high school. She’s sitting inside a large recycling bin in the busy hallway, giving a peace sign, grinning from ear to ear.

That girl is not me.

Instead, if you examine the background, you see a stone-faced Emily, holding a massive pile of books with a large pink velvet purse dangling from my shoulder. I’m averting my eyes, but my body language says it all: I knew they were goofing off in school, and I did not approve.

I’ve loosened up since then. But there are certain things I still take too seriously, like finding out that I made a typo, failing to budget properly, or being overdue on a library book. In an attempt to avoid these “missteps,” I practice rigorous self-judgment and set unachievable standards for myself. This intense approach to living sets me up for failure and robs me of the peace that comes with self-acceptance.

Especially now in this COVID-19 moment, in the middle of an extended period of social distancing, we’re all getting up-close-and-personal with ourselves. It’s confronting. My chattery self-talk constantly pulls me away from my body; I find myself hypothesizing, catastrophizing, and wandering a million miles away from the here and now.

So if the gravity of the world is feeling a bit much, here is your permission to explore some levity. Let’s lean into the small joys and absurdities, and officially designate silliness as self-care.

What does it mean to take yourself too seriously?

Taking yourself too seriously has little to do with how silly you actually are. You can be a wacky comic or a deadpan scholar and still take yourself too seriously (same goes for deadpan comics and wacky scholars). It’s about the amount of control you try to take over things that are uncontrollable in your life—and how you respond to occurrences outside of your authority. If you freak out because someone suggests using a “different cookie recipe than the one you know just this once,” then you’re probably taking yourself too seriously. (This is me.)

I am goofy in casual situations around people I love. But when it comes to breaking out of my existing patterns or official business, like school, work, or finances, I have a no-nonsense side (see earlier: stone-faced Emily). My silly voices get replaced with a desperate fear of misspeaking. My obsession with puns gets steamrolled by worry that my humor will be mistaken for unintelligence. I become less flexible; I curate myself because I want control.

Not taking yourself seriously doesn’t mean you lack self-respect, or that you’re ambivalent about who you are. It means that you see and accept yourself at your most elemental—as a changing human playing out an unfinished story. When you loosen up on yourself, you open up space for play, for exploration, and for change.

Learning to let go

As the years go by, I more fully embrace the ridiculous, improvisational person I am when I’m with my friends. I want to be that person all the time. So, I’ve started to tip my hand to people I know less intimately; that is to say, I’m getting a little stranger with strangers. ?

I’m working towards allowing myself to feel feelings, without self-critique. I’m practicing self-forgiveness for the things I consider “less-than” about myself: a gummy smile, nails that are never painted, and a fear of calling people on the phone. (I could go on here—can’t we all?—but I won’t).

This manifesto may sound like I’ve figured it out. I haven’t, and letting go of things beyond my control is a long and continual process. I still plot out negative outcomes or responses to my creative work as if they’re certainties. I outline how I think things will go, which prevents me from doing them in the first place. (Ah, putting the cart before the horse—one of my favorite too-serious hobbies.)

When I actively seek the humor or levity in situations that are beyond my control, I offer myself an olive branch. Right now for example, I’m eating more sweets, engaging in more screentime, and exercising less than I should. I could (and sometimes do) berate myself for not being “better.” But I find joy in ridiculously indulgent recipes, performing in character for my friends via Marco Polo, and running around my apartment in glorified pajamas. You can’t control what happens, but you *can* control how you respond to it.

How to tap into your less serious side

I still have days where I freeze up and can’t handle going with the flow—a last-minute change of plans? A small, unforeseen expense? Sleeping past 10 a.m. on a weekend? These things interrupt what I thought was managed. I’m so firmly grasping for control, that when things slip out of line, I slip too.

So here are a few things I’ve been reminding myself lately (especially in the midst of a global pandemic where almost everything is outside of my control).

Be who you are when you’re around your besties. I am vulnerable, forthcoming, and absurdly strange when I’m with my friends. We transition seamlessly from long-winded monologues in our pets’ “voices” to discussing the heaviness of the world and its politics. We laugh together during our darkest days as a way of reminding one another that we’ll always be here for each other.

Allow your body to play. What form does this take for you? For me, it looks like dancing or crawling around on the floor to pet my rabbits. Maybe you crave the feeling of grass between your toes or a simple inversion; practicing playful embodiment is a good way to get out of your head.

Create something unusual. Creating without goals helps me let go of how I think things “should go.” I appreciate creative opportunities to go with the flow, like painting or writing stream-of-consciousness journal entries. If those suggestions aren’t your style, try wearing two conflicting garments, improvising as you cook dinner, or singing a silly song to your pet. Create something before your mind has a chance to call out imperfections.

Take pauses when you need to reset. Sometimes all my seriousness needs is a few seconds to reboot itself. When plans change outside of my control, I take a moment to recalibrate and accept the new flow. If you’re with someone else, take a quick bathroom break or even just ask for a few minutes to process.

When in doubt, engage the senses. Our need for control happens so much in our minds. When I’m wrapped up with worry, I love to indulge my senses to remind my brain she’s part of a human body. Eating a rich pasta dish, feeling the softness of linen sheets, and literally stopping to smell the roses on a morning walk can remind you that the present is all we have. Embrace it.

If you find yourself forcing control today, loosen your grip. The world will not always bend to your will, which means it’s time to embrace a little flexibility on your end. I know I need to.

How to stop taking life too seriously

New research shows Oreo cookies are as addictive as cocaine.

I’m not surprised. Oreos were my gateway drug. A first-grade classmate turned me on.

But it wasn’t long before I was mainlining Oreo’s evil cousin, the Twinkie. Even those hellacious yellow cakes of sugar didn’t cut it, though.

Tonight, I stand before you a broken man, feeding a three-carton-a-day Devil Dog habit.

I am a DevilDog-aholic. #SugarJunkie.

That’s one of many lame stories I tell as a part-time stand-up comedian plying my trade at various Manhattan comedy clubs. And while comedy began as part of a midlife crisis, I’m here to tell you it’s become a serious full-time strategy for me, my firm, and increasingly, my clients.

Comedy works

Check out these statistics:

  • 97 percent of employees believe it’s important for their managers to have a sense of humor, according to a study by HR consulting firm Robert Half International.
  • The two most desirable traits in leaders are a strong work ethic and a good sense of humor, according to the Bell Leadership Institute.

I insist that every one of my employees be trained in stand-up comedy. I’m not a frustrated talent agent searching for America’s funniest new PR person–I’m trying to improve employees’ presentations and listening skills, their ability to build rapport with any audience, and handle objections on the fly.

I’m also building rapport within my organization. Crain’s New York Business cited comedy as the reason it named Peppercomm NYC’s top workplace. My stand-up comedy tips will enhance your leadership skills, and differentiate you from the pack. If they don’t, you can heckle me at my next show.

1. Be self-deprecating.

Self-deprecating humor is especially powerful. I use it whenever something goes dramatically wrong in a meeting. Typically, the glitch is a technological one that sidelines my entire pitch. Instead of sweating, freaking out, or clamming up, I chuckle and say, “When it comes to technology, our motto is ‘Expect less.’ And, as you can see, we deliver on that promise.” It immediately defuses any tension in the room, displays my humanity, and gives us valuable time to fix the glitch.

Joel Citron, CEO and managing director of Tenth Avenue Holdings, a holding company that specializes in making private equity investments in small businesses, says, “People won’t take you seriously if you can’t laugh at yourself. You have to be as good a catcher as a pitcher when it comes to jokes.”

2. Be in-the-room.

How many times has one of your presentations been sidetracked by a late-arriving prospect or a multitasking decision-maker?

I always welcome a tardy audience member by asking, “Did you decide to do the food shopping before work?”

And I positively salivate when a multitasking executive starts making love to his mobile device. I’ll elevate my voice and say, “I appreciate how much my last point meant to you, and I’m honored to know you’re sharing it right now with your direct reports.” All eyes will turn on the multitasker who will grin sheepishly, set down the iPhone, and sit up straight.

By being in-the-room and acknowledging what the audience sees and hears, a smart executive can use distractions to her advantage. Remember, people partner with people, not robots. As Tenth Avenue’s Citron says, “Who can relate to a superhero?”

3. Fill the void.

Negative reactions don’t kill new business presentations. Silence does. In fact, reacting to a deafening silence from a room full of stone-faced, lifeless stiffs is what makes people fear public speaking more than death.

When my recommendations are met with either a yawn, a glassy-eyed stare, or snoring. I zero in on the perpetrator, and begin a one-on-one conversation. “What was it about today’s presentation that’s curing your insomnia? Whatever it was, let’s pitch it to CVS as an OTC remedy and partner on the patent rights, OK?” Bingo. The silence will invariably turn to chuckles, and possibly, just possibly, I’ll have saved a terminally ill pitch.

4. Display vulnerability.

The V-word is becoming an increasingly important tactic in every leader’s crisis plan. Whether it’s Barack Obama, Chris Christie, or Paula Deen, more and more politicians and executives are displaying vulnerability. “The One” shouldered blame for ObamaGate. Christie said he was personally hurt by the BridgeGate betrayals. And little ol’ Paula Deen cried her ever-loving heart out on the Today Show. But all three seemed a tad contrived.

People are simply too savvy and cynical nowadays to buy into a quick apology. Vulnerability is not a trait that a leader suddenly dons like a wool cap in a snowstorm. It’s a quality that you demonstrate each and every day.

“The best leaders are the ones who openly discuss their frailties, explain how they’ve overcome them, and teach a serious business lesson in the process,” says Citron. “Omnipotence rings hollow in business.”

5. Be emotionally full.

When I media-train executives, I always counsel them to display more emotion. After all, if you’re not passionate about your product, service, or organization, why should your audience care?

Emotional fullness demands that you tell the truth. All great comedians begin a bit by telling a true story, and then exaggerating it. Citron says he’ll only deal with honest leaders. “If an entrepreneur won’t tell the truth about himself, that tells me he won’t tell the truth about something negative in his business either,” he says.

In business, emotional fullness separates the wheat from the chaff. I’ll support an executive who’s fully invested emotionally–especially in times of crisis.

A few years back, we lost our largest account. It hurt, and it meant we’d need to lay off some key staffers. It was critical to convey confidence and business continuity, but I also needed to let my staff know that I, too, was mourning the loss. And so I quoted Abraham Lincoln, who after a setback early in the Civil War said, “I’m too old to cry, but it hurts too much to laugh.”

How to stop taking life too seriously

Life is uncertain; we don’t know what will come our way and what the future holds for us. The truth is, nobody knows about the future but, isn’t that a great thing?

It’s like going to watch a suspense thriller movie, we don’t want anyone to spoil it for us, we want to be surprised and amazed. We can make all the predictions we want “I think this will happen” or “I think this person will do this”. We watch the movie and nothing that we predicted happens, and that’s when we say “wow that was a wonderful movie”. We were captivated during the whole movie, intrigued by what will happen next.

Our life is fantastic; the only thing is that we lost the ability to enjoy the suspense. We want to know the end before we even start the game. But wouldn’t that be a boring life?

We need to stop worrying about everything and just enjoy the ride. At the end of the day, we arrived in this world with nothing and we will leave with nothing; there’s no special box we can take with us when we leave this place.

The only thing that counts is “did you make your life experience profound and intense enough?”, that’s the most important thing. We came here to experience life, not to avoid it. So, it’s time to live. We can either be excited or fearful about it.

We worry about tomorrow because we’ve already fixed in our minds what should happen and we’re afraid of what we think might not happen. But tomorrow still doesn’t exist. The reality is that there’s only now. What happened in the past is already gone and what happens in the future still doesn’t exist.

The great thing about human beings, that separates us from all the other creatures on this planet, is our sense of memory and imagination. Our memory keeps the past events alive and our imagination already produces what might happen tomorrow. Our problem is that we focus so much on these two things that we fail to appreciate the present. We worry and stress about everything, we manufacture misery in our mind and let our memory be a source of suffering. Yet, we forget stress is not a part of us. We can’t change what happened yesterday, but we can adjust our psychological process for it to not affect us.

Having a job, not having a job, getting married, not getting

married, having children, not having children; we find everything stressful. Yet, we forget we are the producers of our own emotions and how we perceive and deal with them.

If you had a choice would you rather be blissful and happy or miserable? It’s your choice. You can’t control outside events but you can control what happens within you.

How you perceive, feel, think, understand and express yourself will determine how happy you are.

For instance, when we fail in something we can use that situation to make us stronger or we can let us crush us. At the end of the day, failing is beneficial; remember, success comes to you not because you desire it, everyone desires it, but because you’re capable of it. There’s really no need to add fear and worry into the equation, if you’re capable of something then it’ll come your way and if not you learn from it, no one is perfect and no one is the same. You already achieved so much so far, even if you don’t realize it. Be happy with what you’ve accomplished, don’t take it for granted!

Really, there’s no need to be too serious. Bertrand Russell once said, “If you’re beginning to think that what you’re doing is very important, you need to take a holiday”. Every day take a holiday from your seriousness, enjoy life instead.

Seriousness comes from ourselves; we hold ourselves as important people. The truth is, we are just a speck of dust in this experience. We are like a pop-up on a computer; we pop in and we pop out. Life will still go on without us so, why not enjoy life whilst we’re still here? Loosen up your life a little bit, laugh a little more, involve yourself with people around you, do things that you think are not so important. Don’t do important things, do simple things. If you constantly do very important things, then your life will become dead serious. Now it’s time to be alive!

You don’t know if you’ll ever run faster than Bolt or become the richest person in the world. There’s only one thing that you must do to yourself, one thing you deserve, one thing that is 100% in your hands; you can live here as a joyful human being.

Life is not suffering.

If you ride life, it feels fantastic. If you’re crushed by it, it feels terrible.

How to stop taking life too seriously

Life is a journey. It has many ups and downs, but don’t take it too seriously There are many important things to worry about in life, but don’t let the small stuff get you down. Here are 15 reasons why you shouldn’t take life too seriously!

1. You don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow

You don’t know what is going to happen tomorrow. You could wake up and have a bad day, or you could have a bad day!

Don’t worry about little things that are out of your control. Live in the moment and don’t worry about what it going to happen tomorrow.

2. You don’t know what the future holds

You don’t know what is going to happen in the future. In fact, you can never be 100% sure about anything that is going to happen!

So don’t worry too much about it and just live your life for today.

3. You don’t know what other people are going through

You don’t know what is happening in the lives of other people. They may be dealing with something difficult and you don’t even see it.

So don’t make assumptions that they have perfect lives just because they seem happy on social media.

4. There are things that are out of your control

There are many things that you don’t have control over. It is something that we all must accept at one point or another.

It is okay to be upset about what you don’t have control over, but don’t let it bring down the good things in life.

5. It’s not the end of the world if something goes wrong

It is easy to take things too seriously sometimes. It can happen when you don’t get the result that you want or if something doesn’t go as planned. But don’t stress too much about it.

This isn’t the end of your life, and there are many more opportunities in store for you.

6.Life is short so enjoy it

Life is short and you don’t know when it will be the end. You don’t want to spend your life worrying about things that don’t matter or making yourself unhappy.

It is important to enjoy your life day after day.

7.Your problems are meaningless in the grand scheme of things

Your problems don’t seem to matter when you think about them in the grand scheme of things.

There are many people that don’t have food, water, or even a place to live and these people would trade their lives for your worries any day.

8. It’s impossible to please everyone all the time

It is impossible to please everyone all the time. You don’t have control over what other people think and you can never make them happy no matter how hard you try.

It is just something that we all must accept at some point or another.

How to stop taking life too seriously

9.You can’t control what other people think of you

You don’t have control over what other people think of you. You can try to get them to like you, but it is impossible.

So don’t bother too much about their opinions and just worry about yourself instead.

10. You don’t need to be a perfectionist

You don’t have to try and be perfect or worry about the small things that are out of your control. Some people want so much for everything in their lives to turn out perfectly, but it is impossible.

You don’t have complete control over what happens – just do your best with whatever you have.

11. You are going to make mistakes and learn from them

You are going to make mistakes in life. You don’t need to worry about it too much because that is how you learn from your mistakes.

Don’t let the small things get you down and just enjoy your day as best you can.

12. Life is a journey

Life is a journey and it can be difficult sometimes. It may seem overwhelming at first, but don’t let the little things get you down.

You don’t know what life has in store for you so don’t worry too much about it.

13. You are not alone

No matter how hard this all seems, just remember that you don’t walk this journey alone.

There are people that love you and want to help you get through whatever life throws at you.

14. You don’t know how strong you can be until it is time to show courage

It may seem like there will never come a day when we need strength, but it will happen someday. It won’t always be easy, but don’t give up and don’t let other people bring you down.

You are strong enough to get through anything that life throws your way.

15. Life is a roller coaster

Life can be so much fun and it feels like just yesterday you were on the highest of highs. But don’t let that fool you because life has its lows too – sometimes deep, dark lows.

You don’t know when these low points in your journey will come up but don’t worry about them! The high points will always make up for the low points.

Final Thoughts

Life is too short to spend it taking everything so seriously. So, take a breath and laugh at the little things in life that will make you feel better about yourself. Live your best life by letting go of negativity and embracing positivity!

How to stop taking life too seriously

Image Credits: Medium

We are rushing behind materialistic goals more than ever. In this process, we have forgotten to acknowledge the real essence of life. In an attempt to achieve our goals (which really is nothing but to be happy), we have forgotten to live in our present. If you too have fallen in this pit, it’s time to stop taking life too seriously. Here are 5 reminders for the same.

Reminder No1: Stop using others’ success as a parameter to measure your own success

How to stop taking life too seriously

Image Credits: Medium

Out of all the reminders, this is one is crucial since we all are guilty of it. Life is not about being ahead of others or better than others, it’s about being the best versions of yourself. If you only focus on reaching the finish line of the race, you will most probably not get the taste of taking part in the process of reaching the line. You will miss out on all the fun. Stop comparing your life and success to that of others. Each individual proceeds in life at their own pace just like you. Life turns out differently for everyone.

Reminder No 2: Don’t forget to live your life while running behind your career

While toiling to gain the sweetest fruits, don’t forget to live life. Pause, breathe, rest, and then resume. Growth is a slow process that cannot be changed. So give yourself the time to grow. Don’t keep rushing and exhaust yourself. In a wild attempt to achieve a bright future, don’t spoil your present. Being harsh on yourself is just going to stress you and cause distress.

Reminder No 3: Don’t work at the cost of your health

How to stop taking life too seriously

Image Credits: Mindfulreturn

The saying “Health is wealth” is immensely accurate. You will be able to move closer to your dreams and goals only if you maintain your health (physical as well as mental health). You must eat healthy foods, find time to exercise from your busy schedule, stay hydrated, and get enough sleep as well. Overworking beyond human capacity is going to put a lot of strain on your body and lead to various health issues.

Reminder No 4: Just like everything isn’t, life too cannot always be perfect and it’s okay

Life is a combination of highs and lows, sadness and happiness, good and bad times. Don’t let lows affect you much. Just like good times don’t last for long, bad times too don’t stay forever. Learn to take failure in your stride and convert them into opportunities to grow. Don’t forget that the best lessons of life are learnt during hard times. Life is just another word for imperfection so embrace your flaws just like you embrace your perfections. Maybe then, life won’t seem that hard.

Reminder No 5: Take out time for your family, friends, and more importantly, yourself

How to stop taking life too seriouslyImage Credits: Best Health Mag

Work and studies are definitely important, but we all need a break. Spend time with your parents, family, hang out with your friends or engage yourself in some hobby of yours. This helps in refreshing the mind and increases productivity. Discuss your highs and lows with them, it might help you to think clearly and move forward towards your goals with more positive rigor.

These are simple reminders you must not forget. Following this will help your mind relax and work with more interest and ability. What’s really the point of so much hustle if it won’t allow you to enjoy and stay happy in life. After all, aren’t we all hustling to build a happy life?

Here are some suggestions that might help when you become separated from your perspective.

by Judy Ringer

We can change our circumstances by a mere change of our attitude.

William James; 19th Century American psychologist and philosopher

I’ve noticed I often take my work, my life, and myself way too seriously.

I blow events out of proportion, demand perfection, and generally behave as if my needs are at the center of everything.

I agonize over small decisions, worry about personal interactions, wrestle with each word of a simple email, and wake up some nights with my heart pounding in anticipation of tomorrow’s presentation or with angst about what happened today. Was that good enough? What if the technical equipment breaks down? Why did I say THAT?! The minutest detail is not too small to escape scrutiny when I’m in this frame of mind – when life becomes very, very serious.

When this happens I lose my self, my center, and my perspective. I step out of the precious present moment and into anxiety about the future or the past. I forget that there’s nothing I can control except right now, right here, this moment and my availability to it.

Happily, remembering this personal truth is what shifts me back into the present. I begin to breathe again and slip seamlessly into the realization that right now, at this moment, I am okay. Sanity returns as I focus on what is at hand.

Vibrant and Joyful

I practice a martial art called Aikido, whose flowing and graceful movements belie the power behind them. Aikido is based on principles such as centered response and utilization of energy, and it has practical applications in the world of conflict resolution and self-management. Morihei Ueshiba, the founder of Aikido, called it the Art of Peace, and said that we must “always practice the Art of Peace in a vibrant and joyful manner.” Aikidoists try to remember this as we throw each other around the mat, smiling and having fun while we practice to perfect our technique.

As we push on into this new century, it is likely that life will become even more complex than it already is. Here are some suggestions that might help when you become separated from your perspective:

  • Acknowledge – Often all it takes to change your current stressed-out state is to notice it. As you bring your awareness back to the present moment, you regain a sense of perspective and possibility.
  • Center – Breathe. Smile. Be.
  • Call someone and talk about it, better yet laugh about it.
  • Read a poem.
  • Listen to music.
  • Take a walk or go for a run.
  • Dream up some practices of your own.

Use your growing awareness to lighten up, smile, live and love in a vibrant and joyful manner. And stop taking yourself so seriously!

About the Author

Judy Ringer is a conflict and communication skills trainer, black belt in Aikido, and founder of Power & Presence Training and Portsmouth Aikido. Would you like free tips and articles every month? Subscribe to Ki Moments!

You’re welcome to reprint all or parts of this article. Please include “About the Author” text, and a link to my Website. If you have any questions, send me a note at [email protected]

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    About Me

    The title of my book, Turn Enemies Into Allies: The Art of Peace in the Workplace, says it all. Through interactive presentations and individual coaching, I’ll help you transform conflict by changing your relationship to it. Aikido is the metaphor we’ll use to become more intentional and less reactive, to communicate directly and respectfully, and to create your life and work on purpose.

    About Ki

    Ki (pronounced “key”) is Japanese for universal energy or life force; it’s the central syllable in Aikido and the symbol you see in my logo.

    How to stop taking life too seriously

    Do you often wonder how to not take things personally?

    There is no need to take anything personally! It’s just a waste of mental and emotional energy.

    You might say it is easier said than done, but truth is that you can do something about it.

    Do you sometimes feel you have been offended? Often, you might have a wrong interpretation of someone’s words or behavior due to lack of sufficient information or missing facts.

    Sometimes, the offence is not real, and the so-called offender never intended to offend you at all. Does this justify feeling offended? You only cause yourself unnecessary suffering.

    So what if someone expressed some criticism? Does this justify thinking over and again about what he or she said? Will this help you in any way? The other person might not even be aware that you have been offended.

    On other occasions, even if the other person did try to offend you intentionally, why accept, think, or dwell on what he or she said? It is absolutely useless and unnecessary to participate in the game of hurt feelings.

    When you feel hurt, insulted and angry, it is very unwise and unhealthy to brood over it, or sweep these feelings under the carpet.

    It is also unwise to allow negative self-talk to take place in your mind, as this might aggravate matters. You need to pay attention to your thoughts and to your feelings if they start veering toward dwelling on any wrongs you believe others did to you.

    It is better, wiser and healthier to learn not to take anything personally.

    Learning how to stop taking things personally requires some effort and time on your part. You can learn to change your attitude and learn to react differently. This becomes possible with a certain degree of emotional detachment.

    Taking things too personally and too seriously, makes life difficult, and often brings unhappiness and suffering.

    When you take things too personally, you make yourself more vulnerable to hurt feelings, anger, frustration and unhappiness. Taking things too personally is like placing a heavy load on your back.

    When people disrespect you or do not treat you well, it is easy to take their behavior personally, to blame yourself and think you have anything to do with someone else’s behavior. Taking things personally is emotionally draining, and an unnecessary, constant reevaluation of your self-esteem. There’s a difference between being reflective and constantly taking slights personally, one is productive and lends itself to self improvement, the other is the opposite. Not taking things personally gives you more control over how you respond, your emotions and your energy level. Here are a few ways to stop taking things personally:

    Stop Worrying About What Other People Think

    At the end of the day, it really is not anyone’s business what people think of you, or anything else. You should worry about what you think of yourself, and what people you know love and care about you think of you, and that’s it. Strangers and aquaintances volunteering their opinion of you has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with them. The sooner you do not care what other people think, the more liberated you will feel, and you will have more of a sense of self.

    Know Your Worth

    You’re not going to believe what other people think and say about you, when you know who you are, and you like who you are. Having self-confidence, and knowing your self-worth is the foundation on which everything else is built: your achievements, your relationships, your ability to keep going when life and work gets tough. Doing the work to have self-confidence, and self-worth is the best work you will put in. The dividends will show in every aspect of your life, personally and professionally.

    Don’t Jump To Conclusions

    According to Psychology Today, when people make a judgement about you, or critiques, they are rarely about you. ” In fact, it’s almost always about them, their issues, their needs, and their desire to control you and/or a situation,” writes Dr. Abigail Brenner. To help manage your response to confrontation, know what you’re sensitive about, and what triggers your emotions so you can prepare yourself if someone mentions them.

    Let Things Go

    Frame painful experiences as lessons, on how to be stronger and how to better navigate bad situations. Do not let them make you angry or bitter, use them to make you better and move on. Holding on to pain does more damage to you than to the other person. So learn to let things go, make more room for joy and happiness.

    Fill Your Calendar

    If you are busy, it is hard to find time to think about other people and what other people think. Fill your life with family, friends and work that brings you joy, and prioritize accordingly. Chances are, the strangers and acquaintances that are passing judgment and making critiques are not going to cross your mind.

    Don’t Climb Down

    When someone disrespects you or is cruel to you, the worst reaction is to reply with more negativity and toxicity. Do not climb down the rabbit hole, and be part of the problem. It may be satisfying in the moment, but it won’t be in the long term, and will likely be something you regret. Take the high road, and let it wash off of you.

    Think about death often. Seriously. Not in an obsessively morbid or fearful way, but in the Buddhist sense of understanding that all things are transient. Events and people, with their anxiety, opinions and expectations, are all ephemeral blips on the cosmic radar. All the world's a stage and stressing over the show is just silly. Sit back and enjoy some popcorn.

    Reminding yourself often that death is just around the corner and no one knows when they'll run into it can free you up to waste less time focusing on the relatively unimportant things people tend to take too seriously, from petty arguments, to rent being late, to any number of seemingly overwhelming crises. Instead become more motivated to make better use of the time you do have and you'll likely find yourself too busy finding solutions to your "serious" problems to dwell on them.

    It might help to make you more friendly too, since you're aware that you might be the last person another may see or speak to. Who wants to be the dick that made someone angry or sad moments before they were hit by a bus?

    Also, understand that nobody knows what the fuck they are doing. When you're young, even into your twenties, you think that being an adult will mean you have things figured out. This is total bullshit. Most adults are just insecure and immature children in adult bodies, and they are fumbling along just as clumsily as everyone else. They just get better at masking it over time. Knowing that everyone is winging it 24/7 can help you to not regard your personal or professional fuck ups in too serious a light. Failure loses a lot of its punch when you stop believing it's the end of the world. Just always make sure to do your best and you'll sleep well knowing you did all that you could do, regardless of the outcome. We're not as in control of things as we like to believe, so stressing out when things don't go according to plan is irrational. There are always a number of factors, most uncontrollable, that determine failure or success. You are only one, and probably not the biggest.

    The happiest and most relaxed people are those who are able to laugh at both success and failure, knowing that neither means anything in the long run. Follow your heart, do what you love, be a force for good in the world to the best of your ability, and make it a point to help others be happy too. Not thinking of yourself all the time has a huge effect on keeping your own difficulties in perspective. There's always someone that has it worse than you, so make the best of what you've got and do it with a smile, knowing you're lucky. Cultivating a more selfless attitude strengthens your compassion and provides insight into the human experience that the more closed off people tend to miss, which goes a long way toward keeping them locked inside their stressful little self-referential bubbles of seriousness.

    Focusing less on yourself and more on others often also translates into you taking things less personally in general, as it wears down the ego to more healthy levels. So mistakes, conflicts and other glitches in the matrix are more easily brushed off. Taking ourselves too seriously is probably the biggest mistake of them all, because it creates unnecessary doubt and conflict within our own minds (between who we are and who we imagine ourselves to be), despite the fact that, generally, our expectations for ourselves and others are entirely arbitrary to begin with. We tend to forget this and overreact when they're not met, which is all kinds of ridiculous.

    tl;dr: Life is hilarious when you understand that everyone is full of shit for taking it and themselves seriously, despite the fact that they are going to die sooner rather than later. Live, laugh, and love. Relax. It's just a game.

    In life, most of us are hauling way too much around.

    Key points

    • For the most part, you have the freedom and autonomy to decide what burdens are necessary in your life.
    • Practice getting rid of possessions and responsibilities that you no longer need or want.
    • For at least a short time, try not saying yes to any new obligations, and see how that feels.

    How to stop taking life too seriously

    What’s weighing you down?

    The practice:

    Be less serious about everyday life.

    On the path of life, most of us are hauling way too much weight.

    What’s in your own backpack? If you’re like most of us, you’ve got too many items on each day’s to-do list and too much stuff in the closet. Too many entanglements with other people. And too many “shoulds,” worries, guilts, and regrets.

    Remember a time when you lightened your load. Maybe a backpacking trip when every needless pound stayed home. Or after you finally left a bad relationship. Or just stopped worrying about something. Or came clean with a friend about something that had been bothering you. How did this feel? Probably pretty great.

    Sure, we are no longer nomadic hunter-gatherers whose possessions could be carried in one hand. You know what you really need in this life; personally, I’m glad about good friends and a full refrigerator. But all the extra physical and mental stuff you lug around complicates your life, weighs you down, and keeps you stuck. There’s enough weightiness in life as it is without adding more.

    Putting this subject in a larger framework, consider the Hindu idea that God has three primary manifestations: Creator, Preserver, and Destroyer. I can’t do justice in this brief space to this view, but the simple notion that works for me is that there is a lawful and beneficial principle in the universe that is about pruning, emptying, completing, and ending.

    This positive “destroying”—very broadly defined—enables creating and preserving, like exhaling enables inhaling or emptying a cup of something bitter enables filling it with something sweet.

    Dropping loads enables lightening up.

    In general: Lay your burdens down. And rarely pick up new ones.

    Now the details: Pick someplace for storage—like a bookshelf, drawer, or corner of a closet—and clear it out of everything you no longer truly want or absolutely need. Give it away or throw it away. Notice how this feels—both anxiety and positive feelings. Sometimes we fear we will sort of blow away in life if we don’t have a lot of stuff. Then focus on the positive feelings and open to a sense of reward in dropping things you don’t need. Keep going with other stuff you don’t want or need, both at home and at work.

    Take a hard look at your obligations, responsibilities, and tasks. Maybe write down a list. Ask yourself: do I really need to do all of these things?!

    Open to that voice of wisdom in you that’s telling you what you can afford to drop. Open to a sense of freedom and autonomy: You get to decide what makes the most sense to do, not the “shoulds” yammering away inside your head. Decide what you can give to others to do—and get them to do it. Decide what you could stop doing, whether others pick it up or not.

    For a period of time (a day, a week, a year), do not take on a single new major obligation. Regard all new activities, events, and tasks as “guilty until proven innocent”—toss them in your backpack only if you are certain you truly want to or absolutely have to.

    Consider your relationships. Which ones feel weighty, entangled, encumbered? Then consider what you could do about that. Could you step back? No longer engage on certain topics (e.g., intractable health problems, conflicts with third parties, the past)? No longer perform certain roles (e.g., problem-solving, quasi-therapist, dating advisor)?

    Take a look at your mind: What weighs it down? Guilt about long-ago misdeeds? Needless anxiety? High, perfectionistic standards? Grumbling anger? Grievances? Passivity, lethargy? Doubt? Taking yourself way too seriously?

    Whatever it is, for a brief period of time—half an hour, half a day—totally drop it. At the first whiff, drop it. See what that’s like: probably pretty great! Then ride that great wave of relief and lightness and continue dropping those lead weights in your mind.

    Overall: If in doubt, throw it out.

    Play with feeling lighter in your body. As if you are lifted up by invisible helium balloons. Lighter in your step. Your head lighter on your shoulders.

    How to stop taking life too seriously

    In life, we can be incredibly hard on ourselves, and there are many situations where we might take things more seriously than they should. Being too stressed out about certain issues can lead to major anxieties long-term, and it can cause us to feel less happy and accepting of ourselves on a daily basis. Thus, it’s important to be easier and not take things too seriously in order to better our health and happiness.

    As a certified health coach, I work with clients on being more accepting of and loving towards themselves, and to try not to exacerbate issues and blow them up to extremes when it is unwarranted. Such added stress will only cause us to feel worse, and we will be less likely to problem solve efficiently and quickly. There are also some issues that are simply more trivial, but we tend to blow them out of proportions either due to the presence of other life stresses or a built up over time. When matters are not as important as they seem, it’s better to brush them off and move on in order to not get sucked into the negativity and insecurities at hand. Think of these eleven things that we shouldn’t take too seriously in order to start feeling easier, lighter, less stressed and happier overall.

    1. Witty Jokes

    Sometimes, jokes can come out wrong. I love the idea of being able to have a wide sense of humor and the ability to poke fun at yourself and those around you in a playful manner. However, sometimes witty humor can be misinterpreted and it can offend people if it is not expressed in the appropriate audience. Take a joke for what it is and realize that it was not coming from a malicious place.

    2. Being Wealthy

    Yes, having enough money to get by and create a happy life that you enjoy living is important; however, being the wealthiest person within your network should not be a top priority. Much research has shown that wealth does not equal happiness, and so while making enough for your needs and desires should be a top goal, becoming richer and richer will not necessarily lead to greater happiness long-term.

    3. Your Range Of Knowledge

    It’s impossible to be knowledgable about every subject in the world, and it’s important to be accepting of what you do not and to embrace how well versed you are on those given topics. Instead of agonizing over the information you are missing, focus on your positives and realize that others who might be experts on topics you don’t know might know absolutely nothing about your particular specialties. Instead, try and share information and learn from one another.

    4. Constructive Criticism

    Yes, criticism is phrased poorly can be hard to stomach, but instead of thinking of criticism as a negative, shift your perspective to appreciate it as an educational experience, where you can learn how to do better and perform more productively in the future. Don’t take such advice so seriously, as it does not mean that you are undervalued, less intelligent or a failure; it simply means you could make room for improvement.

    5. Your Crush Won’t Text Back

    Sometimes people get tied up with other things. Between work, other relationships, chores and travel, people get busy and are not always accessible via phone. Instead of jumping to conclusions and thinking that your man or woman of interest is ignoring you, give him or her some time to finish whatever is going on and reply. Stay positive and cut him or her some slack.

    6. Your Phone Is Dying

    It’s not a serious matter if your cell phone battery is draining. Nowadays, it’s very easy to find areas to charge your phone or to find a friend or co-worker who can lend a charger. Plus, while you might not be able to call someone, if you are in a familiar area on an average day of the week, you should be fine finding your way home at the end of the day. Not having Instagram for a few hours isn’t such a big deal.

    7. You Didn’t Sleep Well Last Night

    Unless this becomes a pattern, and you find yourself chronically sleep deprived, tossing and turning for one night is not going to suck the life out of you. While you might be a tad sleepier that next morning, a good workout and some energizing snacks throughout the day should help you stay alert. Head to bed an hour or so earlier to try and make it up the next night.

    8. You Got A Pimple

    Chances are, people won’t notice. Same goes for a frizzy hair day, a slight sunburn (which is bad for you though, so be sure to wear sunscreen and be safe!), and mismatched socks. We often feel insecure about inconsistencies in our wardrobe and personal appearance, but we overestimate how much people really care. Most people look at our faces and listen to what we have to say, without judging the little changes in appearance that can fluctuate each day.

    9. Your Parents Being Parents

    Parents are parents. While we seek out their advice on many issues, as their experiences are certainly valuable and we know that they are here to support us, it’s silly to take their inappropriate or overbearing comments so seriously. If your mom starts dancing in public, just laugh, as she doesn’t mean harm and it’s not that embarrassing. If your father starts to pry into your love life, just brush it off with a smile.

    While there are some issues that call for a more serious conversation or particular attention, there are so many little, trivial things that shouldn’t cause as much stress. Put things in proper perspective to understand when to laugh at certain things, brush them aside, or give them some serious thought.

    Do not take life too seriously. It can already be difficult enough without that extra stress. Life is easier and happier when you don’t expect it to be pleasurable all the time. It’s easier to enjoy life if you don’t take it too seriously.

    How to stop taking life too seriously

    Escape image by ThePixelman on Pixabay.com

    I love this one for obvious reasons. It’s very close to my Don’t Take Happiness Too Seriously and to my tagline, I take happiness seriously. So you don’t have to.

    “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.”

    Do Not Take Life Too Seriously

    It doesn’t mean you should only have fun all the time.

    Think About it the Logistics

    To constantly have fun would require constant planning so that the next few things are fun. That amount of planning would be exhausting.

    Not only that but the amount of fun you get from something once you do it wears off. You’ll need something a little more fun next time. You’d suffer…

    Expectation Escalation

    How to stop taking life too seriously

    That constant increasing level of pleasure wouldn’t just be difficult to plan, it would take tireless creativity. There are far better things to exhaust creativity on.

    Lower expectations are easier to meet, so don’t increase them naturally by constantly chasing pleasure.

    It will be expensive!

    Somebody’s Gotta Fund the Fun

    The food, drink, concerts, planes, trains and automobiles.

    The money will run out. When there’s not enough to funds for constant fun the pleasure would end. And let me tell you this:

    There’s no fun in FUNd!

    Okay. That’s not true. There are definitely fun ways to fund fun. Also, all the letters are right there.

    Let it Be

    As the Beatles said, let it be. Do not take life too seriously. It doesn’t have to be fun all the time. Trying to make life pleasurable and fun all the time would be exhausting. Sometimes you have to work to fund the fun. There’s a great chance you’ll enjoy the work. Maybe you’ll enjoy what you complete.

    You Will Never Get out Alive

    At the risk of being dark, the result is the same. Whether you enjoy and love life, or just miserably get through it, the end is the same.

    The Way it Ends May Not be the Same

    A little self-care might make the end a little better. Sufficient sleep, nutrition and exercise could mean the difference in a sick and painful last few years and a happier, more enjoyable last few years.

    So rather than constant indulgence and diversion, suffer a little nutrition and exercise.

    Constant Pleasure Will Not Make You Happy

    Too many desserts and drinks are delicious and enjoyable on many levels right now but will make you sick over the long term.

    The same with television and movies. Your older self really needs you to work on mobility, strength and balance.

    Give Yourself and Your Loved Ones Presents for the Future

    Give them a little inheritance or at least write down some stories and what you learn from them. Perhaps a blog or writing stories on Medium. Give your future self a healthy, strong, balanced flexible body and a clear and creative mind.

    Since you love quotes, you might as well check out Inspiring Happiness Quotes!

    Definition of take (someone or something) seriously

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    “Take (someone or something) seriously.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/take%20%28someone%20or%20something%29%20seriously. Accessed 15 Mar. 2022.

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    I have a serious tendency to take myself too seriously. I care a lot about the world and the people in it; I have OPINIONS.

    My nightstand will always have a Very Serious book on it – about refugees or religion or mass incarceration or justice – but I’ve been reminded again lately that I need to counter-balance that intensity with some lighter fare.

    I’ve written before about how the Shopaholic series taught me to lighten up, but it’s a lesson I need reminding of on a regular basis. Sometimes I need to remember that I’m not Superman or the Savior of the world, and somehow reading lighter books helps me to do that.

    So without further ado, here’s an eclectic collection of books that made me laugh, helped me to lighten up, gave me perspective, and snapped me out of my tendency to take myself too seriously.

    How to stop taking life too seriouslyIs Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) by Mindy Kaling

    I’m a big fan of the whole comedians-writing-funny-books genre, and this one is my favorite.

    “In Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?, Mindy invites readers on a tour of her life and her unscientific observations on romance, friendship, and Hollywood, with several conveniently placed stopping points for you to run errands and make phone calls.”

    How to stop taking life too seriouslyThe Martian by Andy Weir

    This book is what they were thinking of when they came up with the word “page-turning” and Mark Watney makes me laugh.

    “Six days ago, astronaut Mark Watney became one of the first people to walk on Mars. Now, he’s sure he’ll be the first person to die there. But Mark isn’t ready to give up yet. Drawing on his ingenuity, his engineering skills—and a relentless, dogged refusal to quit—he steadfastly confronts one seemingly insurmountable obstacle after the next. Will his resourcefulness be enough to overcome the impossible odds against him?”

    How to stop taking life too seriouslyHamilton: The Revolution by Lin-Manuel Miranda and Jeremy McCarter

    This book made me happy and it made me cry and also I learned things about American history that I did not know. No one said “light” has to equal “fluffy.”

    “Lin-Manuel Miranda’s groundbreaking musical Hamilton is as revolutionary as its subject, the poor kid from the Caribbean who fought the British, defended the Constitution, and helped to found the United States. Fusing hip-hop, pop, R&B, and the best traditions of theater, this once-in-a-generation show broadens the sound of Broadway, reveals the storytelling power of rap, and claims our country’s origins for a diverse new generation. The book does more than tell the surprising story of how a Broadway musical became a national phenomenon: It demonstrates that America has always been renewed by the brash upstarts and brilliant outsiders, the men and women who don’t throw away their shot.”

    How to stop taking life too seriouslyI’ve Got Your Number and everything else by Sophie Kinsella

    “Poppy Wyatt has never felt luckier. She is about to marry her ideal man, Magnus Tavish, but in one afternoon her “happily ever after” begins to fall apart. Not only has she lost her engagement ring in a hotel fire drill, but in the panic that follows, her phone is stolen. As she paces shakily around the lobby, she spots an abandoned phone in a trash can. Finders keepers! Now she can leave a number for the hotel to contact her when they find her ring. Perfect!

    Well, perfect except that the phone’s owner, businessman Sam Roxton, doesn’t agree. He wants his phone back and doesn’t appreciate Poppy reading his messages and wading into his personal life.

    What ensues is a hilarious and unpredictable turn of events as Poppy and Sam increasingly upend each other’s lives through emails and text messages. As Poppy juggles wedding preparations, mysterious phone calls, and hiding her left hand from Magnus and his parents, she soon realizes that she is in for the biggest surprise of her life.”

    How to stop taking life too seriouslyThe Secret Diary of Lizzie Bennet by Bernie Su and Kate Rorick

    A novel based on a YouTube series based on a classic. A++, would read again.

    “Twenty‑four‑year‑old grad student Lizzie Bennet is saddled with student loan debt and still living at home along with her two sisters—beautiful Jane and reckless Lydia. When she records her reflections on life for her thesis project and posts them on YouTube, she has no idea The Lizzie Bennet Diaries will soon take on a life of their own, turning the Bennet sisters into internet celebrities seemingly overnight.”

    How to stop taking life too seriouslyTalking As Fast As I Can by Lauren Graham

    Charming and funny and just the ticket when you need a little break from the stress of the world.

    “In Talking as Fast as I Can, Lauren Graham hits pause for a moment and looks back on her life, sharing laugh-out-loud stories about growing up, starting out as an actress, and, years later, sitting in her trailer on the Parenthood set and asking herself, “Did you, um, make it?” She opens up about the challenges of being single in Hollywood (“Strangers were worried about me; that’s how long I was single!”), the time she was asked to audition her butt for a role, and her experience being a judge on Project Runway (“It’s like I had a fashion-induced blackout”). Including photos and excerpts from the diary Graham kept during the filming of the recent Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life, this book is like a cozy night in, catching up with your best friend, laughing and swapping stories, and—of course—talking as fast as you can.”

    How to stop taking life too seriouslySeriously… I’m Kidding by Ellen Degeneres

    There is a chapter in this book called “The Secret of Life” and when you turn the page all it says is “KALE.” Ellen is one of the funniest people alive so a few hours spent with her book is a pleasure.

    “I’ve experienced a whole lot the last few years and I have a lot to share. So I hope that you’ll take a moment to sit back, relax and enjoy the words I’ve put together for you in this book. I think you’ll find I’ve left no stone unturned, no door unopened, no window unbroken, no rug unvacuumed, no ivories untickled. What I’m saying is, let us begin, shall we?”

    What lighter fare have you been reading lately? I’m always on the lookout for books that will make me laugh and help me to lighten up.

    In the meantime, I’ve just picked up Sophie Kinsella’s new novel, My (Not So) Perfect Life. I’m only a few chapters in and I’ve already laughed out loud, so: mission accomplished.

    How to stop taking life too seriously

    Sincerest apologies to anyone with this line in their dating app profile, but if you want my advice, you should probably reconsider immediately. Your intentions were of course in the right place, but to many well-seasoned daters, this highly prevalent statement is a major red flag.

    To me, this line means a number of things. It reads as code speak for “I’ll make offensive jokes and say ‘ugh, chill’ when you don’t laugh.” Another possible subtext is “I won’t put labels on our relationship and I’ll call you a psycho if you ask me to.” And what’s that? I’m getting a strong whiff of “I’m emotionally unavailable.”

    In my experience, no good has ever come of saying “don’t take yourself too seriously” in an in-person, real-life interaction. It’s a little like telling someone to “calm down” in an argument — one surefire way to have the exact opposite effect of the desired outcome.

    How to stop taking life too seriously

    But hey, that’s just my opinion. When I asked the good people of Twitter how they felt about this popular sentence on Hinge profiles, and whether they would respond to someone with it in their profile, the reaction was pretty interesting. With 569 people responding to the survey, 55.9 percent stated it’d be a hard pass if they spotted that line on someone’s profile. 24.1 percent said they’d give them a chance, and 20 percent said they wouldn’t care. Franki Cookney, sex and relationships journalist, described this line as “100 percent code for ‘I do not give a fuck about your opinion’.” As journalist Rosie Spinks put it in response to the poll: “Translation: I don’t want to deal with your emotions or anything hard because I am emotionally avoidant. I regard it as a deal breaker.”

    In the replies to my tweet, some said they associate this line with people who “cancel on you 3 times in row then tell you to ‘chill out,'” while others associated it with gaslighting, offensive jokes, toxic behaviour, and a refusal to take the relationship seriously.

    Writing about the Seriously Phenomenon in Harpy magazine, Althaea Sandover mused about the patriarchal connotations of straight men stipulating they’re looking for women who don’t take themselves “too seriously.” “These Seriously Bros want a certain idealised woman; one who isn’t ‘stuck up’ or ‘high maintenance.’ They want a woman who doesn’t think too highly of herself to ever date guys like them,” wrote Sandover.

    Straight male daters have pointed out that this line is very prevalent in women’s profiles, too, which suggests it really might be time for everyone to retire this hackneyed phrase.

    "While you may be tempted. this line is overused."

    Logan Ury, director of relationship science at Hinge, knows all too well just how much use this phrase is getting. “Your Hinge profile is your opportunity to make a great first impression. You want to stand out and show people who you really are,” Ury told Mashable. “While you may be tempted to write ‘I want someone who doesn’t take themselves too seriously,’ this line is overused.”

    “That means people will scroll past it. Instead, write specific, original responses that show us who you are. For example, ‘I’m looking for someone who loves puns and singing during car rides as much as I do,'” Ury added.

    How to stop taking life too seriously

    Aside from being overused and somewhat loaded in its meaning, this line just doesn’t make sense to me. Have you ever come away from an interaction and been like, “I like her! She doesn’t take herself seriously!” I certainly haven’t.

    It’s a very admirable quality to believe in yourself, to back yourself fully and — dare I say —seriously. Nothing is sexier than someone with (justified, empirically-backed) confidence in their own ability, talent, and aspirations (not to be confused with arrogance, delusion, and baseless confidence).

    Above all else, recognising your worth is honestly vital when you’re in the dating game. In order to be seriously considered as a partner by someone, you must take yourself seriously first. In a dating context, taking yourself seriously means knowing what you want and asking for it, and not settling for a nebulous, no-labels situationship if that isn’t what you’re looking for. Taking yourself seriously also translates as setting boundaries and maintaining them.

    Daters, if you’re looking for someone who’ll laugh at your jokes even when they’re not funny: just come out and say it. You might actually find someone willing to do that. But if you want to be taken seriously in the 2020 dating stakes, I’d recommend ditching the aforementioned tired line.

    To bastardise a famous RuPaul line: If you can’t take yourself seriously, how in the hell are you going to take somebody else seriously?